Mass Effect: Reaper Dreams

Know and No

"Tis absence, however, that makes the heart grow fonder."

Miss Strickland

May 7th, 2187

Ashley Williams

"Good to see you smile again, Ash," said Garrus. "I've been worried about you for the past day."

"Sorry about that," said Ashley. "Ever since I started sleeping in her quarters, I've been having strange dreams."

Garrus cocked his head. "Really?"

Ashley shrugged. "I suppose it just feels weird to be there, sleeping in her bed. Her stuff is still all around."

"Beats sharing a bunk," said Garrus.

"Yea," said Ashley.

"You sure it's just dreams, that all that's bothering you?" asked Garrus.

Ashley considered the Turian for a moment, then realized the obvious. "Joker told you what he said to me."

"Yea, well, you know Joker. In any case, it would bother me," said Garrus. "I'd have my head wrapped in the possibilities, over analyzing everything that was said between us. It's the kind of thing that can drive you crazy if you let it."

"I don't know what I'm supposed to feel," admitted Ashley. "I mean, it's not that I didn't care for her, but I'm just not that way. I don't know why it's affecting me the way it is."

"Ah," said Garrus. "I see, well if it makes you feel any better, I don't think it matters what way you are. Listen, Shepard was alien to me. Understand that humans, well, ah, you aren't very attractive from a Turian standpoint.

You're short and stocky, and dull... I don't mean stupid, but your flesh is flat toned, too smooth. Some Turians, not all mind you, are attracted to Asari because of the texture of their skin, the occasional sheen that's vaguely reminiscent of a Turian, but humans, not so much."

"Are you trying to make me feel ugly?" asked Ashley.

"No, no, sorry, I went off the track," said Garrus. "What I'm trying to say is that someone like Shepard, well, the rules just don't apply. She had a beautiful soul. We were all in love with her in one way or another. She was that kind of person. If she ever propositioned me? I don't know. It's crazy to think about, but how could I not take that opportunity?"

Ashley was surprised. "Is that why you and Tali?" she asked.

"Yea," said Garrus. "Turians and Quarians are perhaps closer in that regard so it makes more sense, sort of like humans and Asari, but it is still strange to most people, and it is not without its difficulties. In the end though, how you are is less important than how you feel in regards to an individual."

"I think I understand what you are saying," said Ashley. "Maybe I'm not being honest with myself, or maybe what I want most is just for Shepard to be alive."

"There's always that hope," said Garrus. "We haven't held a service yet because we don't know for sure. When we get back we should have news, and even then, well... We've been down this road before, haven't we?"

"But it didn't feel real last time," said Ashley. "This time it feels real to me, definitive, the end."

"I think you should pay Liara a visit," said Garrus.

Ashley shook her head. "Oh, I don't think that's a good idea, Garrus. We've never really been on the same page."

"That's all in your head," said Garrus. "I think it will do both of you good. It's times like these that push close friends apart and bring acquaintances close."