Chasing Colours

15. Leah Fischer

(Edith)

I stood there, motionless. My face showed no change of expression when I heard my sister's pained voice. I stared into her puffy, tired eyes and looked back at the officers who had been carrying her. Pretending that I didn't hear a thing, I said sternly,

"Thank you, officers. I would be pleased if you could just lay her down on the bed. I can take care of the rest."

The burly officer with Ingrid in his arms nodded softly carrying her into the bedroom. I looked back at Ingrid's dishevelled head and unevenly heaving chest. Her eyes were closed and breath, ragged.

I turned back and guided the officials out of the house. I thanked them earnestly. They left as soon as they had come leaving me in the strangeness of the eerie silence that had surrounded me at that time.

Without wasting a minute more, I went into the kitchen and got some hot towels for Ingrid. I didn't know what was going on in my head. I felt inhuman. Mechanical. My hands were working by themselves. Emptiness surrounded.

I sat down next to my sister's wounded form after I had cleaned her up. Trying my best to be as gentle as possible I applied the green slimy medicine on my sister's gruesome wounds. I would withdraw every now and then when I felt her wince in pain.

I kept the medicines aside. I started to get up when I saw my sister's eyes fluttering close when I felt her wounded palm grab my wrist almost painfully.

She opened her mouth to speak, her voice hoarse and unclear

"She was upstairs with Frau Arnet and Frau Weber. She had sent me to the basement to prepare the bed while she fed Frau Weber. Frau Arnet was making the medicines. I don't know when and how it happened. The walls started to crumb. I saw red and yellow everywhere. Everything started shaking violently. I heard deafening sounds. So loud, Edith! The ceiling started to break and I got stuck. But it was all over within minutes. There was smoke everywhere. I couldn't see a thing. I guess, I had passed out for some time. A while later, when I opened my eyes I met with some officers but other than that, there was nothing. Just rubbles of stones everywhere and black air. That's when I was told that I was the lone survivor of the street. There were heaps of dead bodies being taken out of the ruins and loaded. I tried to find my back to Frau Arnet's house. But, there was nothing to find, Edith. No remains. No sign of any living soul."

She broke down, bursting into tears, trying to escape desperately from the bitterness of the truth. I ran my fingers, lightly through her light blond hair opening her knots.

Through her tears, she forced out words to speak, "I won't have anyone to call mama again, Edith. I don't have mother anymore."

I laid down next to her as she hid herself into my chest, crying like a child on the first day of his school. I let her cry. My eyes drooped a little at her sight but I couldn't find words to speak. I had lost my voice.

A void had taken place of the tears in me. You know those moments when you are just so hurt that tears don't come out and you just feel hollow? It was a moment like that. There was a strange coolness taking place of the warmth in the house.

It felt like I could rush downstairs and find my mother humming in the kitchen making me an apple pie. I wanted to call out to her and hear her yell at me not to scream so loud but something told me to let go. I knew I wouldn't hear her say a word again. I wouldn't feel her warmth again. The truth was bitter and the truth was that my mother was dead.

I wondered if she would be here with Ingrid and me if I had told her the truth about where Arno and his family was. I wondered if she would be here if I had acted more responsible towards Arno and his family's safety. From Arno it struck me that even Rosa Weber was gone. How hadn't I thought of that? Arno and Hans were orphans. Their drooped faces rushing into my head. I felt a gush of guilt fill me. A drop of tear instinctively drop down my emotionless face. Was I at fault?

"She loved you, Edith."

I looked down at my sister.

"More than anyone. She was proud of you. Your bravery. Your faith. She never blamed you. She was always on your side. She still is. She is with you." Came Ingrid's muffled voice from my chest, her eyes still shut.

I felt my lips quiver. I shut it tightly and clenched my eyes shut to prevent tears from coming out. I slightly nodded and kissed her forehead, softly. I took a deep breath letting air out of my mouth.

Nothing was the same. Everything was falling apart. Our lives was taking a new turn. Unknown, uncertain and frightening. I wondered what else was in store for us and what would become of my story.