Chasing Colours

17. A cold night

(Edith)

Remaining still in my brother's hug, I look up at him with my lips slightly parted. Heavy huffs of white air came out of both our parted lips. There were tears in Albert's eyes, sliding painfully down his bruised cheeks.

I tried to take a deep breath and guided Albert inside the house. No sooner had we entered the house, father and Ingrid immediately got up from their places, staring at intently at Albert's staggering form, their faces showing a mix expression of surprise and happiness.

They did not move an inch from their places upon seeing him but kept staring with their eyes widened by a fraction. I placed Albert slowly down on the couch.

After some moments of awkward silence, I heard Ingrid speak up almost too quietly, "Albert... your hand..."

I just then noticed one of Albert's shirt sleeve hanging loose on his side. He had lost his left arm.

Albert managed to force a smile onto his face and looking straight up at Ingrid he said, "I am the remains of a bizarre war, Shweschter. A hand means nothing in front of all the horrors I have witnessed."

Ingrid retreated back without saying anything further. Albert turned his attention back to the floor. I kept my gaze at my brother.

From the corner of my eye, I watched my father walked up to him and placing a palm lightly on his shoulder, he spoke in a wavering tone, "Alfred... Where is he?"

I realised his palms were shaking, like something shattering, slowly, almost painfully but he was trying to keep it together.

Albert didn't meet his eyes, instead he kept his gaze on the floor like it was the most miraculous thing on Earth right then.

After a while, he shook his head, "I am sorry I couldn't protect him."

That was all he said.

For a moment I thought father would slap him for not being responsible like he used to when he was a kid or he would just proudly state that his son died a hero. Nevertheless, he did none.

I watched my father fall to his knees, his face hidden behind his palms and tears rolling down his cheeks. And that was when the freezing chill of the night hit me.

Why is the night so cold? When will I feel the warmth again? It's so quiet. I am scared of this dark. The silence is deafening. I can't hear your voice but the noise of all the screams. This loneliness is suffocating. I want to sail through the skies. Release that dove inside. Fly higher than the clouds. Ignite and shine. I want to be free. I want to find the colours and stop chasing them.