Emergent

Chapter Sixteen

"Different?" Tobias asks, no sarcasm left in his tone.

Before he could ask any more questions, I stand with a sigh and walk to the kitchen, gesturing for him to follow. He doesn't ask anymore questions, and I don't prompt him to. As we reach the counter, I halt and press a transparent button on the counter. I turn to find Tobias behind me in complete bewilderment as the counter-top folds inward and a series of computer screens arise. I turn my attention back to the screens and prick my finger on a needle sticking out of a monitor. I stand back as the computer pulls up my files, watching Tobias' reaction.

We both watch as the monitor sifts through everything, my medical records, grades in school, my ranking in the Dauntless initiates, and eventually landing on my blood results. I break the silence when I can officially answer him. "You see that?" I ask pointing to a listing that is in complete gibberish. He slowly nods, comprehension still failing him. I tap the screen in the area of the listing, which pulls up an illustration of my body. It zooms in to my head, locating a small black speck on my brain. "That, that is what started all this. Cara thinks I was born with it. It, well, it is a speck of defiance really. It allows me to view things in a different light. I am not swayed by other's opinions, which makes sense being I fell in love with you despite all the myths the other initiates told me about you." I say with a small smirk, and Tobias nervously chuckles. I sigh as I understand that I need to explain more. "Basically, I sense the tiniest thing wrong with a situation. It was why I knew something was up with factions since I was little. It is why I ran away the other day when nothing was really happening-I ruin things for myself. The only times I have been truly happy have been, well, with you." I continue bashfully, blushing in the last sentence.

"So this thing makes you a fighter. Makes sense." he responded with a chuckle. "But I don't understand why isolation was necessary."

"Fighting factions was a worthwhile cause, it needed to be fought, and so I followed my instincts and defied it. But, Chicago is at peace now. It may not be perfect, but that is just the problem. We are afraid I will sense something wrong at a random time and freak out. We don't need a revolution for nothing." I answer, but Tobias only hums in a discreet disagreement. I try to reassure him it was the right thing to do. "It is like an explosive version of anxiety. And angst, I guess. She said th-"

"Wait, who is she?" Tobias cuts me off, and my insides begin to churn.

"Cara..." I reply quietly, didn't he hear me before?

"Cara." He recites bitterly, and I shake my head. What is his problem with Cara? "This has to be the fifth time you have said her name today, Tris!" He shakes his head, looking at the ground now.

"What do you mean? What is wrong with Cara?"

"It isn't what is wrong with her, but what made her so special she got to know you were alive!" He yelled waving his hands in senseless gestures. "I-I would have been here for you. I thought you knew that. Whatever this thing is in your brain that you think is going to destroy the world or whatever, I would have tended to it. I would have helped you, Tris! And you didn't even manage to say goodbye. I mean-Caleb showing up at your door was a mistake! An accident! If he hadn't taken mail duty that day, we wouldn't know you were alive! Well-we as in everyone but Cara." he finished with a sour snicker.

I don't know what to say, or what to do. Paralyzed with confusion and anger and a whole other mixture of emotions, I don't even move. I thought I would have been crying by now, the yelling setting me off, but I don't even well up. I just stand there, dumbfounded as he continues his rant in mutters under his breath. "I-" I try, but can't even sputter a sentence.

"Don't. Just-I just need a minute, okay? This is-this is a lot to take in." He concluded in a calmer tone, turning to the door and exiting.

After a minute of composing myself, I hurry to the window to make sure he hadn't left. But no, he I find him sitting on my front steps, staring outwards to the woods. I contemplated going out to him, but I decided to let him think for a minute. He did ask it of me.

After about twenty or so minutes, I finally bring myself to interrupt him as I see snow begin to fall, knowing he wasn't wearing a jacket of any sorts. I grab a blanket and wrap it around myself as I step outdoors, the cold dusk air stinging at my lungs.

I say nothing as I sit down next to him, wrapping him in the other half of my blanket. He smiles softly in appreciation, but doesn't say anything. Neither do I for a while, and we both sit in cold silence studying the trees before us.

"Cara, she knows a lot about me." I begin, breaking the silence.

Tobias snickers. "Go figure."

"She knows a lot about me because she knows nothing about me." I finish in a harsher tone than before, angry at his assumption that I chose her over him. He finally turns to face me, awaiting my next statement.

"Cara and I were never on good terms. I did kill her brother, after all. But she was a big help. She discovered this, and we knew we were so close to winning our battle. Peace, at last, was in our grasp, but the only way to actually get it was to remove myself."

Tobias nodded, but it was obvious he still wasn't sure why he was left out of the equation.

"We tried to keep our knowledge basis to a bare minimum. It was Cara, David, and I. But David sacrificed his memory and...that is a story for another time." I cut myself off, trying to not confuse him any further. "Cara found it, so she would have to be in the know. She knows me biologically, but not personally. Not like you. You-I didn't want you in the know."

"Why Tris? Why not? You know I love you, you know I would have taken care of you. Don't you?" he chokes, his eyes glassing over.

I place my hand over his. "I do, Tobias. I do know that. But that is the problem- I couldn't let you throw your life away. I was hoping that you would move on and get married and have kids and a life of normalcy. I knew it was the right thing then, and I still think so." I mutter, looking down at my lap as my own eyes begin to well up.

Tobias' hand comes under my chin and tilts my head upwards to him. "Tris, there is no 'moving on'. I love you, more than anything, and that is all that matters to me right now. I want to be with you, this isn't throwing my life away, this is restoring it. I love you, Tris." he repeated, the tears stinging at my eyes beginning to fall from them.

I smile at him, beginning to really cry. "I love you too Tobias, more than you'll ever know." I whisper before placing my lips lightly onto his.

We were reunited before, but it didn't feel official until right now. Now we are here, the two of us together again, and it felt wonderful.

The sun fully descended from the sky as we reentered the house, ready to officially pick up where we left off.