Adrenalin

Chapter 22 - Hayden

She isn't holding back. She isn't scared. She isn't running.

After taking care of the whole protection issue, I look over at her in all her glory; her smooth skin in the dim light, her black hair sprawled out behind her, the dips and curves of her body all on display. And all for me.

Her cheeks redden under my gaze and she curls her knees up to her chest in an attempt to hide herself from me. She's cute when she's nervous.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Sydney asks quietly, self-consciously.

I grin and leave my position from the edge of the bed, crawling back over her, covering her body with mine. "Because you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

She wraps her arms around my neck, bringing my lips down to hers. I kiss her softly, sliding my tongue over her bottom lip. Her body responds, arching her back. Her breasts push against my chest and I fight my body for control.

Areas of mine touch areas of hers that have never been explored before. She moans in my mouth, pulling back for air. Her legs wrap around my waist, begging for more.

"Are you sure?" I mumble against her ear.

Sydney bites her lip and nods. "I'm very sure."

"I'll go slow, okay?" I reassure her. "Tell me if it hurts."

She freezes under me but she tries to hide it. I haven't even done anything yet. I pull back and look down at her, raising an eyebrow.

"Hayden, I –," she sighs and turns her head to the side, squeezing her eyes shut.

"What's wrong, baby?" I ask, kissing her cheek and her jaw.

"I'm not... I'm not –," she groans in frustration. "I'm not a virgin."

My heart stops for a second.

Right. Okay. Well, I assumed she was. That's not particularly a bad thing. Is it? I don't know.

"Oh." I say plainly. God, Hayden, you're a fucking idiot.

"It's not what you think, Hayden." She pleads, looking up at me. "I've never been with a guy like I have with you before."

I roll off her onto my back, staring up at the roof. I pinch the bridge of my nose. The thought of her and another guy like that together makes my stomach clench. Of course she's probably had sex before, I mean look at her, she's perfect.

But she said she's never been with a guy like this before...

"I'll explain everything if you want me to." She says, propped up on her side next to me. Her fingers trail over my bicep softly.

"How old were you?" I ask. I don't know if I want to know. Maybe I don't want to know. But I'm not going to pass up the opportunity of her being open. It's not often she's willing to talk.

"14." She answers.

14. Fuck me.

"Was it with a boyfriend or...?" I trail off, unable to think of someone else she'd sleep with.

"No." Sydney says quietly. I look over at her. She's scared, she's nervous, she's vulnerable. I've never seen her like this. I raise an eyebrow, encouraging her to elaborate more. "It was late one night and I was looking after the boys, waiting for mum to come home. She'd always have her clients over later when we were asleep. But it was late and she wasn't home yet, so he came over. I guess he got sick of waiting for mum and decided he'd settle for me."

She shuts her eyes, wiping the tears away angrily.

"Jesus Christ, baby, I'm sorry." I whisper, pulling her close to my side.

She wriggles out of my arms, opening the distance between us. "I screamed and cried for my mum, for my dad even." She sobs. "The boys were locked in another room. No one was helping me."

"Sydney, we don't have to talk about it –," I start.

"No. Let me get it out." She replies, sniffling and wiping her cheeks. "Mum came home eventually, but he was already done with me by then. She screamed at him, kicked him out, but she wouldn't call the cops. I guess she was too scared they'd find out about the drugs or the prostitution."

Her tear stained face goes blank and I can see her shutting down inside. "She told me to forget about it, that no one needed to know, that if I ever had a boyfriend, he wouldn't love me if he knew because I'm not pure anymore." She looks at me with dead eyes, eyes that usually brighten the room and warm me to the core.

"I love you." I say. It's the only thing I can say. I've never been good with words, never known the right thing to say, and somehow I don't think she's expecting a long speech on how everything is going to be okay. So I just repeat it again. "I love you, Sydney."

She takes a shaky breath. "I love you too." She looks down at her naked body and so do I. Fuck me, she's perfect. Her eyes switch to mine and I'm caught red-handed. She blushes and crawls off the bed, slipping her underwear and bra back on. I watch as she jumps back onto the bed again, curling her body around mine. She slips a leg between mine and I slide my hand onto her waist.

"We still have time to go out, if you like." I whisper to her.

She looks up at me. "Could we just grab some Chinese and eat in tonight?"

"Sure thing, baby." I answer.

She presses her lips to mine. "Please don't leave me."

"Never." I reply.

I run my hand up the smooth skin of her back, back down the curve of her spin and grab a handful of her ass. Her body reacts instantly. "You are so sexy." I mutter against her ear. She moans my name in response and there's nothing I can do to hide my arousal now. Sydney looks down between us and grins smugly.

"Down, boy. At least take me out to dinner first." She laughs.

"You're evil." I growl, pushing her onto her back and pinning her arms above her head. She wraps her legs around me, intimate places touching once again. "So fucking evil."

"I'm not doing anything." She says innocently, moving her hips upwards against mine. I drop my head and sink my teeth into her neck to stop me from moaning some extremely inappropriate things.

Taking advantage of my momentary weakness, she slips from my grasp and pushes me off. "No seriously, I'm hungry. Let's go."