•May 11, 2010 0 days until suicide•
I stood here looking at myself in the mirror. I looked down at my sweatshirt that lied on the chair. I shook my head.
"I don't need it." I said walking away.
I turned to see the small piece of folded paper. I walked up to it. I read it. It was the note.
Dear family,
I'm sorry to say this now but I need to go. I'm not meant for here. I'm meant to die and I'll be gone soon don't worry. The date will be my graduation: May 11, 2010. Goodbye.
I folded it back up and put in my pocket.
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"There he is!" My mom screamed. I stopped at the bottom of the steps as she pulled me into a hug. "My boy, graduating from high school."
I smiled. "Did you notice anything different mom?" I asked her.
She backed away. She looked at me then a smile came across her face. "Finally not wearing a sweatshirt." I nodded.
"Ashton!" Harry yelled wrapping his hands around my waist.
"Hey." I said bending down to him.
My mom walked into the kitchen. "Do you want anything to eat." She said.
I shook my head. "No." I said. Then I heard a horn blare. I looked out the window and saw Luke's car. "Luke's here mom!" I yelled.
"Okay, see you later sweetie." She yelled back. I sighed walking out the door.
Don't be too sure about that.
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"Are you excited?" Luke said as I got in the car.
"Very. Finally get to leave hell."
He laughed. "You're not wearing a sweatshirt?"
I breathed in. "Nope. I thought last day why wear one, I won't be seeing these people ever again. So why not show off my scarred skin."
Luke smiled. "I'm happy you feel confident with yourself now."
I smiled back at him. "Well it's the last day make the best of it."
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"Last day." Our English teacher said. "We've all survived our last year. It's been a tough year for all of us, more so for others." He glared at me while he said it.
I looked down. Out of the corner of my eye saw someone reach over next to my seat. They sat up with a piece of paper. I felt my pockets. It wasn't there. I looked over to the person. Shit.
"That's mine." I whispered. They looked over to me.
"Here." They said. "What is it?"
"Shopping list my mom gave me." The person nodded and turned away.
Then the bell finally rang. The class cheered. I watched as everyone ran out of the class room.
"Mr. Irwin," my teacher said. I looked up. "It's been hell of year for you hasn't."
I nodded. "Yeah, hell of year."
"You'll do fine in college. Have you applied for one?" He asked.
I shook my head. "I can't leave my mom with my brother and sister. My mom's boyfriend got arrested and I don't have my dad anymore so I'm all they have." I looked down. "I don't have time for college."
He sighed. "You're a good kid Ashton. It seems all the good kids get the bad lives. It gets better." He stood up. "It's time for both of us to leave."
"Mr. Grimes, thanks for this year." I said. He turned to me and smiled.
"You're welcome." He said. "Come back here anytime you want next year."
There isn't a next year for me.
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"I'm home!" I yelled walking into the kitchen.
"Ashton!" Someone yelled as they pulled me into a hug.
"Grandma." I said surprised.
"We came down for the weekend. We came to see out grandson graduate."
"Well this a great surprise." I said with a smile on my face.
"Ashton, why don't you go and get ready. We have to pick up Lauren and Harry from school." My mom said.
They won't be seeing me.
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I looked at the robe on my bed. I sighed and walked into my bathroom. I closed the door behind me and locked it.
I looked around and saw the shine of the blade. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the paper. I unfolded it. I bent down to the door and slid it under.
I heard footsteps in my room. "Ashton!" My mom yelled. I then heard her walk up to the door.
I reached for the blade. It slide out of my hands and dropped to the ground, making a clinking sound.
"Ashton!" My mom yelled banging on the door. "Ashton I know you have that blade in your hand put it down!"
"Look at the paper mom!" I yelled holding the blade closer to my wrist.
"Ashton!" She yelled. "Don't you fucking think about it!" I shook my head.
"I'm sorry." I said cutting downwards. I fell to the ground. Darkness.
Life can be gone in a second weather you or someone else takes it.
Life is valuable. Life can only happen once. Your life can only happen once.
Note: This isn't the last part. I have 1-2 more parts.
This story was hard to write. This being a real life topic, it hurt to write these things. But if you ever, ever think about suicide don't do it. It's not worth it. You don't just kill yourself you kill everyone around you: your family and your friends. If you ever need me for anything, you can DM me on here, my Instagram (thefault_in_our_5sos), or my Twitter (musicshopafi). I'm here for anyone.
Goal: 10 votes and 6 comments.
