I'm not crazy (Scomiche)

Chapter 1

P.O.V.  Mitch

     I've spent years inside of these four walls. The 'All Saints' asylum. I'm not crazy. Yet somehow the blinding off white colour of the walls makes me feel less sain by the minute. I spend most of my time sitting in a corner, listening to music, isolating myself. Nobody comes to talk to me anyways. Not my old friends, not my family. Who wants to talk to a 'Crazy'? They labeled me as a danger to myself and others. I'm not crazy. I'm not.

     I was put in here when my boyfriend, Jackson, tried to rape me. I wasn't ready, I panicked, my thoughts weren't rational. My vision became a blurry mess. When it cleared up, there was a baseball bat in my hand and Jackson was on the floor. There was a dent in his skull. I called the police. I didn't mean to. I'm sorry. They questioned me and now... now I'm in here. I did what I had to do. I'm sorry. Weeks later, the police came and said that he was alive, but he would need speech therapy and would most likely never talk again. I'm sorry.

     I've been in here for six years. I forget what outside looks like. I crave it's sight and smell. I'm only allowed out of my room for meals, even then I have to sit in a separate room from all of the others to eat. I hardly ever get violent with the workers, but sometimes I just snap. They are not things I'm proud of. One time, a doctor wanted to put me into a coma. I wasn't having that, I grabbed the needle and almost stabbed him. I would have to, if it wasn't for Kirstie. 

     Kirstie is one of the only people that actually talk and listen to me. She is one of the phycologist/nurses to be put on my case. She is the only one who isn't afraid of me, and the only one who has ever stayed longer than a month. Like I said before, who would want to talk to a 'Crazy'? She gets that my jokes are just that... jokes. Empty threats. I don't let many people touch me, give me needles or put me in a straight jacket, but I will Kirstie. She is the closest thing I have to family.

     I just wanted a normal life. A boyfriend, a job, a family, a house. I swore I'd never be this. But that's the thing about people; in the end they become the things they swore they'd never be. So, I'll sit in my corner, listen to music loud enough to block out the world and wait for the door to unlock. Food or medicine.

     A few minutes later, mabey an hour, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Must be Kirstie. "Lunch already? It doesn't feel like it is 12 yet." I said while I pulled out both of my ear buds. I hadn't looked at her yet.

     "Well, it's not. Hi, my name is Dr. Hoying. You are... Mitchell?" A lower voice said. Taking me by surprise. I looked over to see a tall, blond guy. He looked cute. It left me wondering what I looked like. Probably awful. I used to look good, but now I haven't had a good haircut in a long time and I don't get to decide what I wear. So that tells me just about all I need to know. I realized that I had been starring at him and that he asked a question when he raised is almost invisible eyebrows.

     "Uh, Mitch." I replied as quickly as I could. He's going to leave, don't get attached. I turned my head back to the wall. Pretending like the brick was the most interesting thing in the world. I wanted him to leave.

     "Okay, Mitch it is." After a pause of silence, he spoke again. "So Mitch, this paper here says that you attacked a few doctors and nurses here. Is that true." He asked, he seemed completely calm about it. Time to have some fun.

     "Yes, and I would leave now, before I maul you. I'm pretty insane." I said calmly. Trying my best to keep the smile in my voice hidden. I'm pretty sure I failed miserably because he chuckled. I shot him a look that said 'I'm serious.'.he opened his mouth like he was about to say something, but was interrupted by Kirstie coming in the room.

     "Mitch! Good news! I got this really cute guy to come work with you. I want you to be nice. I have a good feeling about this one!" She said obviously not paying attention to her surroundings. I nodded over to where Dr. Hoying sat.

     "That one? Too late." I replied. I watched as Kirstie's face turned a bright shade of red. Probably realizing that she just called him cute. She shot me a nasty look. I raised my hand in surrender. Dr. Hoying stood uncomfortable in the corner opposite of mine. She knelt down beside me.

     "Mitch, honey. What did you say to him?" She whispered. I hate when people talk to me like I'm a toddler.

     I leaned over to her ear. "I told him that I would maul him." When I backed away she hit my shoulder. She stood up and gestured for the uncomfortable man to follow. He gave me one last glance over his shoulder. I just watched him leave. When the door shut, I walked over to it as quietly as I could to press my ear to the door.

     "Don't believe what he said. He's just used to people leaving, so he pushes them away. He is actually very nice. He's difficult, this job won't be easy. Don't tell him, but I'm leaving soon. My boyfriend and I are moving. I don't want him to be alone. I am usually the only person he trusts. If you don't want to, I'll find someone else."

Crushed.

     "It's okay. I'll do it." The other replied. 

He's doing it out of pity.

     "Thank you." I ran back to my corner as they walked back in. They both smiled at me. I just looked away and ignored the burning in my throat that told me that I needed to cry.

     "Hey, Mit-"

     "Go away." I spoke sternly but in a loud whisper. Kirstie took a step toward me, but I gave her a warning look. She backed away. Dr. Hoying stayed a second longer. I glared at him, the water building on my eyelids. He nodded his head and left. Leaving me alone. I cried. I sobbed rather. I don't know what I was crying about but I just needed it all out of my system.