I'm not crazy (Scomiche)

Chapter 15

I slowly got up to walk to my own room. I needed to be alone, I needed to drown out my thoughts. I marched up the stairs and reached for my doorknob, but froze. I turned a bit to look at Scott's door. I wonder if he's okay. I could check. I don't really want you to go in there... I remembered him saying. Of course. Why would he risk having a crazy person in his room? I shook my head at that thought. 

Despite my desperate want to go open the door and snuggle with Scott in his bed. The indescribable want to be wrapped in his strong arms. With an exasperated sigh, I turned back to face my door and walked in. My corner looked very welcoming. I ran to it, but not before graving my iPod and earbuds. The first song that played was 'Halow' by Beyoncé. I started quietly humming along. Humming turned to mumbling, and mumbling to quietly singing. 

I felt someone pull my earbud out. My head turned to the person right away and I pushed further into my corner out of fear. "Calm down, it's just me." Scott said. I relaxed a little bit. "You have a beautiful voice. You like Beyoncé?"

I blushed a little. "No." I lied. He shook his head with a bit of a smile. Quickly, he reached down and grabbed my iPod. I tried to grab it from him, but using one hand, he reached around my body and held me still with my arms restrained beneath his one. "Give it back, Scott!" I tried to squirm for my freedom, but he was a lot stronger than me. I watched as he scrolled through my playlist. A small smile played at the corners of his lips. 

He's going to think you're too feminine. He's going to laugh at you and call you crazy and bring you back to 'All Saints'. He continued to scroll. "Beyoncé. Beyoncé. Beyoncé. Beyoncé. Shall I go on?" I hid my face in his chest. I listened to his chuckle. "I love Beyoncé. We should have a dance party some time." 

I looked up at him. "Really?" He nodded. "Oh, uh, what did you want when you first came in here?" A look of realization flashed across his face.

"Listen, come downstairs and sit on the couch. I have to talk to you about something." He walked out before I could even ask what it's about.i became very nervous. I followed him anyways. He was in the kitchen so I went and sat on the couch to wait. The anticipation was killing me. I wanted to know, the other bits of me were dreading the knowledge with everything I had. 

A few minutes later, and Scott walked in. He sat beside me. His refusal to eye contact made my palms sweat. "So, I felt that you should talk to me about that thing that's bothering you." Nope. I decided to play stupid.

"What thing?" He gave me a look. He must've know that I was trying to hide it.

"You know very well what thing. That thing that keeps you up at night. That thing that haunts your dreams. That thing that you were admitted for. That thing that makes your mind race and body tremble in fear. That thing th-"

"OKAY!" I cut him off. I just wanted it to stop. I wanted the memories to stop. He had no right to bring this up. I could feel my brain start to cloud, my body start to tremble. Then, two strong, comforting arm around me.

"Mitch, calm down. I have you. Tell me what thoughts are running in your head."

"No." I came out barely above a whisper.

"Mitchie, talking helps." He was talking to me like I was a child. When did he turn into this person? I hated it. 

My body was shaking violently now. "I'm not a child. I'm not crazy." I said through gritted teeth.

"You're acting like one." That tipped me over the edge. I felt his arms tighten. "Don't let it happen Mitch. I only have means of helping. I don't think you're crazy, or a child. You are Mitch. I am Scott. And what happened to you so long ago, whatever it may be, it haunts you. It makes you feel insane. I want to help you, but I can't. You won't let me." He pulled me into his lap when I tried to thrash at myself. "Don't let your thoughts win, Mitchie." I hurried my face in his neck. Inhaling his sent made me more comfortable. "Is it over?" 

"Mmhmm." I said tiredly. His fingers trailed up and down my back. It was soothing. I should tell him. Do I trust him enough though? Of course. I pulled back to look him in the eyes. "Promise you won't leave, promise you'll still be here?"

"Always." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Recounting all of this was painful. I felt a single tear drag down my cheek. "A few years ago, I fell in love with a man. He told me he loved me, and he said he'd never hurt me. Held me tight as I slept. But one day, he got tired of me or something. He tried... he tried to do... things. Things that I wasn't ready for. I told him no. I fought and declined as gently as I could. He kept at it though. He almost did it too. He would have if I didn't... if I didn't..." I looked up and he looked terrified.mi should stop. Your going to hurt him and he's going to think you're for real crazy. Well, maybe you are. No. No. "Should I stop?"

"No. Keep going. You're doing well." He traced his finger tips up and soothingly back down my back. This encouraged me to continue.

"If I didn't hit him over the head first. I blacked out. I don't remember doing it. I panicked. When my visioned cleared, he was laying on the ground with a dent in his head. In my hand was a bloody baseball bat." I was scared to look up. I didn't want to see his reaction. I waited for him to announce that he was bringing me back to 'All Saints'. Instead, I felt two of his fingers gently lift my chin up, forcing my gaze to meet his. 

"I'm sorry. That should never have happend to someone as beautiful as you." His fingers remained under my chin. "I hope that whomever you fall in love with next is a million times better than that trash could even think of. He should hug you often. He would laugh with you, and cry with you. Support all of your decisions no matter what crazy thing pops into that mind of yours. He should cuddle you and make butterflies flutter in your stomach. Most importantly, he should kiss away every problem and sometimes just to make you smile." I watched as his gaze trailed from my eyes to my lips. "Don't freak out." He quickly leaned in and pecked my lips. It lasted less than a second. 

He pulled back to look into my eyes. I looked into his. "So, he should be a man like you?" He leaned in again. This time, he captured my lips for a kiss that lasted an eternity, it felt as though it had only been mere seconds. My eyes fluttered shut and I knew for sure now, I was in love with Scott Hoying. He wouldn't hurt me ever. When he pulled back for a second time, he waited until I opened my eyes. "I'm tired."

"I know." He lifted me like I was a child. My legs were wraped around his waist and my head was, once again, in the nape of his neck. His hands were on my back to hold me up as he carried me up to my room. When he laid me there, he went to walk out. I grabbed his hand to stop him. "Stay?"

He leaned down to kiss my forehead. "One step at a time Mitchie. My Mitchie?" I nodded frantically earning a small giggle from my boyfriend. "Alright, great! Goodnight then, my Mitchie." Than he walked away, making sure to flip on the light first. He left me disappointed, but I was also left with a huge smile on my face. He was the best boyfriend I could ask for.

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A/n: you all better love me. If you have any suggestions, good or bad, I will take them. I'm open to anything. If you don't want to comment it, than message me. Or not, it's up to you really. Love you all! Kiss kiss!                   -LinesOfBlack (Rhiannon)