Last January

130812

Jongin absentmindedly bowed to everyone who said their condolences to him. It was his parents' funeral, but he felt like he was out of place. Some were people who he had never met before, some were people he didn't recognize and so on.

"So what are your future plans after this?" His uncle approached him and pat him on the shoulder. Before Jongin could answer, his step aunt intervened, "You can live with us if you want and back to hometown. We have always seen you as our own son"

Jongin had to fight back a scoff. He nodded politely and said, "I'd figure it out," and then excused himself. He would go back later when all of this people are gone from the place. Being here only made him feel suffocated more and more. His soul had already been begging for fresh air and a taste of nicotine.

Before he exited the room, he gazed around the room one more time. He saw a middle aged woman he never knew, sobbing hysterically in front his parents cremated body.

"This is just so fake," he mumbled under his breath and just so suddenly, he had this urge to laugh.

Why do people care when it's too late?

Where were all of them when his parents were still alive?

Jongin shook his head lightly and exited the room. "Where is the smoking room?" Jongin asked the suster who passed by.

"You are allowed to smoke on basement or rooftop."

"Thanks," Jongin replied and decided the rooftop would be nice. He walked towards the lift but then changed his mind and took the stairs instead. He need more time alone.

He felt the fresh air surround him as soon as he opened the rooftop door, feeling relaxed and weights were lifted from his shoulder for the first time. Jongin hummed his favourite song while his hand took out his cigarette from his tuxedo's pocket.

He lit his cigarette and then sat at a corner of the rooftop. His head propped on the barrier. Jongin loosened his tie and yawned. He had yet to sleep at all, after his parents' car accident. He still needed to hold another funeral at his parents' hometown the next day. More people he didn't know would show up. And that meant more fake tears. More things to take care.

"This going to be last time I attend funerals" Jongin promised himself and threw away his cigarette before he fell into a deep slumber.

                               ⇔

Jongin woke up when he heard someone's footsteps. He rubbed his eyes and his shoulder tensed when his vision became clear. A man wearing hospital patients outfit stood so close to the end of rooftop. There was a large gap between the barrier. One more step and the said man would fly freely into the ground before death.

Jongin was already fed up with his parents' death. He didn't need to see another death take place in front of his eyes. Maybe he couldn't stop his parents' death because after all, the accident was inevitable. He couldn't rewind the past to make his parents alive.

However, he could save this man.

Jongin got up, trying to not generate any sound. He held his breath as he approached the man from behind. The man seems unaware of Jongin's presence. He couldn't see the man's face since he was facing the latter's back.

Without thinking twice, Jongin grabbed the man's waist and pulled him. The act caused him to lost his balance and fall flat on his back. "Shit!" Jongin hissed.

The man shrieked and landed with his butt on top of Jongin's crotch. Jongin realized how awkward their position was and somehow it was funny to him. He couldn't help but chuckle.

"W-what are you d-doing?" The man stuttered. He managed to stand away and turned his body away from facing Jongin who still laid down on the ground.

Jongin lifted his head to see big eyes and heart-shaped lips staring at him. "...Saving you?" Jongin said with glimpse of hesitation.

"Saving me?" The man was dumbfounded.

"I though you were going to jump and break your body."

The man's lips turned to a straight line. He shrugged and said, "Maybe. But it's none of your business"

"What's your name?" Jongin asked, changing the topic.

"What?" The man was once again dumbfounded and taken aback with Jongin's words.

"Your name." Jongin repeated his words but it sounded more like a command this time.

"Do Kyungsoo. You?"

"Kim Jongin"

Jongin started to think hard about how to make this stranger named Do Kyungsoo to feel better. He looked up to the sky and an idea popped up. A little smirk appeared on Jongin's face. "So, Mr. Do Kyungsoo, could you help me get up?" Jongin extended his hand to Kyungsoo.

"O-okay..." He replied hesitantly. Kyungsoo grabbed Jongin's hand, attempting to pull him. He wrinkled his nose, because Jongin weighed heavier than he thought.

On the other hand, Jongin tried to hold his laugher when seeing Kyungsoo's hard attempt to help him get up. It's not that Jongin was too heavy or the fact that Kyungsoo's body is smaller than him.

From the start, Jongin had no intention to get up at all. His smirk grew wider when instead, he was the one who easily pulled Kyungsoo down. Kyungsoo was startled and lost his balance again, but this time he fell flat on his stomach, on top of Jongin.

"What the-" Kyungsoo's eyes widened as Jongin's face was only a few inches away from him, he abruptly rolled his body to the other side. His heart beating so fast and his cheeks flushed.

He ready to opened his mouth again but Jongin snapped first, "Before you scold me, you better look at the sky first" Jongin said calmly.

Kyungsoo shifted his gaze into the sky. He stared at the view with fascination. For a moment he just lay there watching as the blue sky turn into shades of purple, yellow, and orange.

"That's... beautiful..."

                                ⇔

Author's note:

I told you this story won't have a happy ending.

Nevertheless, I never tell you this story wouldn't have a beautiful beginning.

"It's like I'm reading a book and it's a book I deeply love. But I'm reading it slowly now. So the words are really far apart and the spaces between the words are almost infinite. I can still feel you and the words of our story but it's in this endless space between the words that I'm finding myself now. It's a place that's not of the physical world. It's where everything else is that I didn't even know existed. I love you so much. But this is where I am now. And this who I am now. And I need you to let me go. As much as I want to, I can't live your book any more."

Goodbye dear readers,

Time to live your own story because this time I can't live your story anymore, previous.