Hello my cuty!! So so sorry for not updating for such long time. But now I'm back! So here we go!
Chapter - 12
Things not to say or do at a funeral..
p.s. I know this might be quite mean but I really couldn't resist. Sorry!
1. Ask whose funeral it is.
2. Videotape the burial (rolling on the floor).
3. Wear something pink.
4. Offer tissues to mourners, for a reasonable price.
5. Gasp and say you think you left your oven on.
6. Shout "Bullshit!" during the eulogy.
7. Take bets on the next person to go.
8. Tie a fishing line to a five dollar bill and see who's really mourning and who just wants to be five bucks richer.
9. Try to convince someone who's weeping to go out with you.
10. Whistle a happy tune.
11. Eat popcorn.
12. Applaud after the burial.
13. From behind a tree at the cemetery, yell something Godly into a megaphone.
14. See how much Easy Cheese graffiti you can spray onto the coffin before somebody postpones the funeral for a wipe-down. Offer to supply the Windex.
15. Ask if anyone has seen the old "saw the casket in half" trick.
16. Put on a hand buzzer and slap one of the pallbearers on the ass.
17. Tug on the coffin while the pallbearers are carrying it. Try to hang from it.
18. Ask if anyone knows a five-letter word for "decomposition".
19. Tell somebody your iguana died. See if you get any sympathy.
20. Flip open the casket and run.
21. Make phone calls.
22. Receive phone calls.
23. Check e-mail.
24. Hold a protest near the grave site. Claim that the cemetery uses non-union gravediggers, or yell something about sacred Indian burial ground or groundhogs being threatened with extinction.
25. Hand out flyers during the burial promoting an after-party or special prices on dry cleaning. Even better, two-for-one tombstones for one week only.
26. Start a sing-along.
27. Fake a heart attack.
28. Before the body is lowered, announce that the guy in the back told you he wanted to say something.
29. Ask everyone to join you in prayer. Say something profane in Latin. See if anyone notices.
30. Tell the deceased's mother that you're bored.
And finally...
31. Introduce yourself as "the guy who killed him".
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Things not to say (Completed)
HumorHere you are going to find some lists of things that you should never I mean ever in your life should say to your teacher, on a date, to your boyfriend, girlfriend and well you know the rest ;) P.s. some of the stuff here is from internet and some a...
