I don't own The Princess Bride from which the first half of the dialogue and characters comes.
. . . . .
"Have fun storming the castle, boys!" Merlin called.
"Think they've got a chance?" his wife asked.
He ran the odds in his head. He had seen enough by now that he was rarely wrong. "It would take a miracle." He thought back some more over his own adventures, and he cheered quickly. Miracles weren't nearly so rare as you'd think.
"Goodbye!"
He watched them walk away. It felt a little wrong not to go off storming it with them. Then again, being Miracle Max was the most fun he'd ever had.
He turned to the woman beside him. "I'm not a witch, I'm your wife?" he repeated. "Since when are those mutually exclusive concepts?"
She sniffed. "Oh, hush, you. You're no better. A BLT? Honestly?"
"Speaking of BLTs, I don't suppose - "
She whacked him.
