Thomas Brodie-Sangster Imagines.

92) Paranoia and Anxiety.

(Y/N)'s POV.

My mum told me everything was going to be fine. My dad told me to stay out of trouble. I told myself everything was going to end horribly. I left for my bus earlier than I should've and I just took a small walk around the block to compose myself, ready for the day. I just wanted to get out of my house, but I never wanted to leave. I wanted to go to school and get the day over and done with, but I didn't want to even look at the school gates. A new school is always a tantalising thing but starting at a new school and a new year ten is different. Further down the school no one cares. Year sevens welcome you with open arms, and I know from having witnessed it to my best friend... Who I had to say goodbye to. It reached half past eight and I walked into the school gates. The time from when I left the house to when I walked into the new place where I would be spending most of the next four years of my life seemed to fly by. I walked down the yard, people glaring at me from every angle, making me feel too paranoid to even breathe. I felt my chest beginning to stiffen and I quickly walked to where my head of years office was.

"Good morning (Y/N)." Mrs White, a nice and polite looking lady greeted. My new head of year. She seemed to be in her late forties/early fifties but she was still the nicest person I had met in the school so far. "Are you ready to start your first day?" I didn't reply. Usually I'm a bubbly and talkative person but this new school felt like a prison. "Is something bothering you?" She asked kindly. I just shook my head and held my gaze to the floor. "Okay... Well you have had your tour of the school. English is your first lesson, I hope you settle in okay." She extended her hand, my new timetable in her hand. I took it off her and stood up quickly, ready to leave and get it all over with.

"Th-Thank you miss..." I quickly left her office, not giving her anymore time to speak. I made my way to my English class and noticed I was a bit late. I could see all my new classmates already sitting down, the lesson in way. I felt my hand shaking as I reached for the door. I gently pushed it open, the door being a lot heavier than I had thought, causing me to struggle slightly. Faint giggles sounded from the class and I felt my cheeks beginning to flare. The teacher was stood at the front of the room and walked over to speak to me.

"Hello, you must be... (Y/N)? Am I right?" I froze. Not knowing what to say or do. I was just scanning the class, locking eyes with some of the people there and noticing some of them whispering between themselves.

"Uh... I... Yeah. I'm (Y/N)..." I was stuttering so badly. I hoped no one had noticed but I was far from right.

"Okay. If you would like to take a seat over there, I'm sure some of your new classmates will get you up to speed." He said politely. "My name is Mr Stevens." I felt like everyone in the room was staring at me as I walked over to my new seat. The tables were set up in fours and there were eight of them, four students to a table, except not all the seats were full (most were though). I sat next to a girl who looked like she really didn't want to be in school, someone who just could never be bothered with lessons and always want to mess around instead. Opposite her was an empty seat and opposite me sat a boy. He looked a little younger than he probably was and was relatively tall considering he was sitting down. He had hazel eyes and dirty blonde hair. He made eye contact with me as soon as I sat down but I couldn't hold it for more than two seconds. I put my head in my hands on the desk, feeling my cheeks flare up bright red as they were hidden. The lesson went by slower than any lesson I had ever experienced in my life. I didn't lift my head up since I walked into the room. The bell rang and I shot up out of my position, grabbed my bag, and headed straight for the door where I was stopped by Mr Stevens. "Miss (Y/L/N), did you take note of anything that was said this lesson?" I was the closest person to the door so because I had been stopped and the whole class had bunched up behind me. I heard several of the boys making comedic remarks.

"I... I..."

"Greenie was akip sir, saw her meself!" One of the lads laughed as he walked out of the door laughing, followed by everyone else in the class. I felt myself beginning to get worked up, I was terrified in case that happened, and it did. I moved away from the door and slammed myself down in the nearest chair I could find, my head rested in my arms ad my elbows propped it up on the desk. I noticed the last person to leave the class was the boy who was sat opposite me and he had a look on his, he seemed somewhat spry for me. He followed the others out the door leaving me and the teacher alone in the class.

"I know there is more to this young lady than there seems, and I can tell you have something on your mind. Is everything okay?" I felt tears beginning to form in my eyes and heard the door open again. Sir looked over and I heard a boys voice sound.

"Sir, I didn't get a homework sheet. Are you-" I turned my head to see who it was. It was the boy who was sat in front of me. "Hey... Is everything alright?" He asked politely as he came over to where I was. He could obviously see the tears, shining from the light, on my cheeks.

"I'm trying to help, Thomas, but I have another lesson I can't be late for. I'm teaching sixth formers, could you-"

"Of course Sir." He said, the teacher not even having to finish his sentence.

"Thank you. This class is empty for this next lesson. Let me write you a note saying I give you permission to be in here." He moved over to the desk and scribbled down something on a piece of paper then quickly left the room. 'Thomas' sat in the empty chair next to me and neither of us said anything for a short while.

"Is everything okay?" He asked gingerly, not wanting to make me feel anymore uncomfortable than I already did. I just shook my head. "You don't say much do you?" He joked, smiling awkwardly then retracting it. I smiled something small in the corner of my lips making Thomas smile again. "There's that smile." He grinned. I turned to face him and tried to smile bigger, but my vision was soon blurred by tears once again. I couldn't hold them back no matter how hard I tried. I let it all out, slamming my head on the desk. Thomas quickly wrapped his arms around my shoulders and hugged me tight. "Hey... Come on? Speak to me... I can help."

"No..." I sobbed. "You can't, you don't know what this feels like..."

"What? Being the new person at school? Being called the 'greenie' by the other people in the class? I do. I promise. I know exactly what your going through." I lifted my head up off the desk and stared blurrily into his eyes.

"What do you mean?..."

"I was the last new person here. I know what it's like to feel like everyone is staring at you and talking behind your back." He reassured.

"But this has never happened to me before... I'm not even this kind of person..." I sniffed.

"Well what kind of person are you usually?" He questioned, a small smile forming in the corner of his mouth while he tried to change the subject to lighten thee mood.

"Happy and bubbly. I've just been feeling so paranoid lately... Scared about not fitting in or anything, all this has lead up to anxiety feeling and attacks and it's hard to cope with sometimes..." He looked me sorrowfully in the eyes and extended his arms.

"These usually help me feel better?" I smiled weakly, stray tears still escaping my eyes as I leaned forward and entered his embrace.

"Thank you Tom..."

"I'll always be here if you need me, right?"

"Good that." I smiled as I pulled away.

"There's that smile." He repeated, making me giggle slightly. "Ooh, a laugh now too! Two for the price of one!" I moved back closer to him, back into a hug. I finally felt like I fitted in, at least in his arms. "Ever need anything, let me know. Come on. Lets get to geography." He smiled as he stood up, pulling me with him and towards the door.

"What if anyone says anything?.." I hesitated before stepping out of the door.

"We tell them the truth." He winked as he locked his hand with mine. I rested my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes for a short second as we walked down the corridors.

"Oh, why did I get called greenie?"

"We're reading The Maze Runner in class."

"I've read that! I really like that Newt character."

"Me too." Thomas smiled cheekily as he looked down at me.