Lost Memories

Guilt.

Jade's

Hindi ko na inisip kung tama ba na tumigil ako dun, at tingnan lang ang mabilis na kotseng parating na sakin, i was ready to stop the chaos in my mind, and the pain of being betrayed by the person that mattered the most to me. Yes, it was selfish to think that way, to just end this all unbearable feelings and leave it all to them. Hindi ko na din kaya, gulong gulo na ko. I just wanted it to end.

And suddenly, someone pushed me away from my ending. Nagulat nalang ako ng magising ako bigla, nahihilo. Naramdaman kong may tumulong dugo sa ulo ko, and i felt a little cut in my head. i turned to look at who had pushed me, the car was already gone, and i saw althea laying all covered with blood, my heart breaked into million pieces, i frozed there, before i could even got up to check on her, i cried, this was all my fault, i didn't even let her explain. "Althea! Please, stay with me." My tears felt endless, she tried to looked at me and closed her eyes, it was unbearable to see her like that, i'm so scared to lose the person i love the most, my partner, my bestfriend, my one and only althea. When she closed her eyes, the flashbacks begun, and i remembered everything. All of it. Did i really have to lose althea for me to remember everything? It was unbelievable. "Althea!!! Naalala ko na na lahat, please don't do this to me!!!" I'm trying to wake her up, but she didn't. "Tulong!!!!" I shouted, i couldn't take this anymore, i feel so helpless.

Someone with a good heart helped me out to take althea to the hospital, they rushed her right away to the OR to clean her wounds and cuts. I couldn't take it. I sat down, crying. This is just a nightmare. It can't be happening. And, the doctor, suddenly called my attention, i got into my feet right away, i was all worried.

"Excuse me? Are you a family or a friend, of Althea Guevarra?"

"Ahm, I'm her, .. I'm her Girlfriend. She lives with me." The doctor, raised his eyebrow and his jaw dropped to what i've said, i didn't even care about what he thinks. "Oh. Ahm, sorry about that. Well, She's in the ICU right now. She's fine, but still unconcious."

I came right away to the ICU to see her.
I just cried there, looking at her. Pleading her to fight for me.

"Althea, please wag mong iiwan. Please hindi ko kaya. I'm sorry, kasalanan ko kung bakit andito ka." Umiyak lang ako ng umiyak, nakayuko sa kamay niya.

It was then i realized 2days have already past and althea is still unconcious. Every second of it, felt harder and harder. Batchi, wila and miggy came to see her, also my family.

Batchi took miggy home, an hour ago. I could see the pain in their eyes. I stayed with althea, waiting patiently. Batchi brought me some clothes and food, ayoko kasi iwan si althea.

"Lablab, gumising ka na jan oh. Sorry na! Hindi ko na to kaya, please hindi ko na kayang ganyan ka." I cried again. At napayuko. Nagulat ako ng may humawak sa ulo ko, kaya tumingala ako, i saw althea looking at me and smiling. "Althea!!!" I hugged her, at lalo akong naiyak. "I'm so sorry lablab, sorry na hindi kita muna kita pinakinggan.." She held her fingertips to touch my lips. "I .. heart you." I just stared at her, still crying. "I heart you too, sobra althea. And you know what i, i already got to remember everything."
I hugged her again.

The doctors made some test to make sure althea is all good to get home.

althea looked a lot better now, it was already a week ago when she got out of the hospital. She recovered fast. I've given all my time and effort to make sure i take good care of her.

Days, weeks had past by and everything came back to normal. I'm just so glad that everything is in the right place now. Sinubukan kong mag drive ulit para ako naman ang maghatid kay althea sa trabaho at kay miggy sa school. I knew in my heart my love for althea became stronger to all that had happened, i love her more and more each day.

It's sunday, Miggy and Althea were playing ball in our garden, i came out to join them. I got some meryenda. When the doorbell suddenly ranged. I saw Althea, opened it. Hindi ko masipat kung sino ba ang bisita at tulala lang siya, so i walked towards her, and hugged her from the back. Smiling, Tulala pa din siya, i got confused kaya tiningnan ko na kung sino ba yun. And It was cathleen.

Okay, it was cathleen. Although years have already past and it was a long time ago, pero si cathleen pa din yun. The woman who took althea from me. Althea made sure na wala na silang contact ni cathleen, right after they broke up. Wala na din daw siyang balita dito at, sa pag kakaalam ni althea, wala ding balita si cathleen sakanya. So Bakit ba siya nandito?

"Ahmm, Hi Althea.. And Hi jade!" She looks like she saw a ghost. Nasurprise ata siya to see me and althea back together again. She then looked away from me. And turned to althea."I just came to see you althea, i heard what happened to you kaya kinulit ko si wila para malaman ang bahay mo, to visit you."

Sa totoo lang naiinis na ko. Kaya hindi ko na napigilan. "Hi cathleen, well ahm. Althea's all fine now and happy, right lablab?" I turned to look at althea, smiling. "Ah eh, Oo okay na ko matagal na din yun."

"Ah okay, it was nice seeing you again althea. Happy for you. I should probably go." She looks disaapointed. Na-guilty ako pero i didn't even bothered. Pakiramdam ko threat siya sa masaya at maayos kong pamilya.

"Wait, cathleen. Bat di ka muna pumasok, meryenda muna tayo." You gotta be kidding me. Parang hindi ko ata kaya to. Nagulat ako sa sinabi ni althea. So i just nod. Cathleen smiled and entered. Miggy ran after her, and hugged her. "Namiss po kita Mommy Cath."

Okay. Okay. Mas lalo na ata ako naiinis. at okay, nagseselos ako. Nagkwentuhan pa sila ni althea kasama si miggy. At tahimik lang ako. Tintingnan ko lang sila, I can see happiness in their faces. And i couldn't take it.

"Lab, akyat muna ako ah?" Althea turned to me, confused. "Oh bakit lab? Are you okay?"

"Ah eh, sumakit lang bigla ulo ko. Kaya magpapahinga muna ko," i turned to cathleen, "thanks for the visit cathleen. It was nice to see you again." The truth is, hindi ko na kaya pang tingnan sila. It felt like cathleen is trying to steal my family. I turned away, I didn't even bothered to hear what they have to say.

Umakyat nalang ako. I jumped in the bed, and just lay down there. I need to stop thinking. Even if there was this little doubt about althea's love for me.