Finding my angel, facing my demon

Time to make a choice

"What happens now?" Alison asked in a small voice. In all my years with her I had never seen her act that way. She looked like she needed me to take care of her. I hugged her tightly and kissed the top of your head.

"You should go to bed. I can come back in the morning and we can talk. Hanna said that she..." Alison cut me off before I could finish.

"I don't want to talk about her right now and I would really like it if you would stay with me. Not like for sex or anything but stay with me like you used to." Alison looked at me and for the first time in three years I felt hope.

Part of me wanted to make some wise joke but I knew better. Alison was going through a hard time and it would be cruel of me to make jokes. I nodded and we both talked for a while longer. Our conversation went from sad and depressing to lighthearted and nostalgic. We spoke of our good times and how much fun we had had. She even commented that she had far more good memories than bad, which was why it was so hard for her to believe that I had left her. That put a bit of a damper on my parade. Midnight arrived and I asked Alison again if she really wanted me to stay. She technically still had a girlfriend and I was unsure if she wanted me there for the right reasons.

"Yeah, silly. Come on. I am getting tired." Alison smiled in a way I hadn't seen her do in years. She looked truly happy although I had no idea why. We had only talked about idle things. Her dad and brother, my parents, our careers, our past. Nothing of real importance but in the end I guess they were the only subjects that really mattered. We didn't need to talk about Hanna or Aria or any of the bad things that had happened. The time for those conversations would come soon enough. That night we were happy to just talk with each other like we had when we were younger.

I pulled Alison tightly into my arms and hugged her. "I have missed you a lot, cara. Goodnight." I knew the house well enough to know that there were two guest bedrooms. I started to head that way but Al grabbed my hand before I could go.

"Stay with me." she repeated. For one fleeting moment I mistook her intention and got a little too happy. When I remembered her 'not for sex' comment I floated back down to earth and followed her to her room. We tossed me a pair of boxer shorts and told me to change. She wanted me to change into only a pair boxers in front of her? I was astounded.

"Grow up, Emily." she chided. She reminded me of my mother, sometimes. She always had. She was so caring yet so bossy sometimes. "I appreciate how noble you are being but we have seen all there is to see with each other and if I remember correctly you like sleeping topless. I remember liking you sleeping topless too."

"Cara, if I didn't know better I would say you are trying to seduce me." I laughed. I always called her 'cara' meaning beloved in my native Italian tongue. Alison was familiar with the Italian language. She even learned enough to speak it with my grandparents. One of the many reasons why I loved her so much.

I got a deep throated laugh from my cara that made my insides melt. She seemed so happy in such brief, fleeting moments.

"I wouldn't have to seduce you." she said in a husky and very sexy voice. She looked at me that certain way (You know the way that makes you know she is thinking dirty things) and I found myself struggling for air. She laughed again and brushed my reaction aside.

You have become cruel Alison." I growled as I changed. I decided to leave my bra on to keep temptation at bay, mostly for my sake.

"Oh" she giggled. "What a bummer. I was hoping to see some of the goods." She idly pointed at my chest.

"Don't forget that I know exactly how to get your motor going too, Ms. DiLaurentis." even as I joked I remember happier times. There had been a time when I had called her by my last name. It was small things like that that made me wish for the old days. I continued to smile though and I trotted off to her closet while she made herself comfortable in the bed. I found an old long sleeve tee shirt hanging in the back of the closet that appeared that it was about five sizes too big for Ali. I slipped on the shirt, with my bra on, and I pulled the boxers off. I only buttoned the shirt half way, exposing most of the front of my bra but my panties remained covered. If she wanted to play hardball then I could too. I fluttered out of the closet and I showed off my new attire. My poor Alison's jaw almost hit the ground.

What's wrong, cara? I thought you would like it. You wanted to . . . How did you put it? Oh yeah. 'See the goods.' Right?" I laughed and got into the bed next to her.

"What were you thinking about?" She asked after we both got comfortable in the bed. "Right before you went into the closet, I saw a sad look on your face. What were you thinking of?"

She knew me too well. It was almost unfair. I could never have a private thought or emotion with Alison around. I loved it. But the memories still hurt. "I called you Ms. DiLaruentis ." I murmured. "There was a time when I called you by a different name."

"Don't get all sentimental now. I remember that we were about ten minutes away from getting drunken tattoos that one night." Ali giggled a bit but I could sense the pain in her voice. "Do you remember what I was going to get?"

Of course I do." I laughed. Part of me wished she had actually gotten it. "You were going to get my last name on your hip."

"Yes, I was." Alison whispered into the dark. I could tell that she was thinking of our past.

"Sometimes I wish you would've." I told her as I turned onto my side to face her. The soft moonlight entering the room through the window lit up her face in the most sensual way I had ever seen. "I kind of used to wish that you were marked with my name for everyone to see."

I got another laugh from my gorgeous ex. Just looking at her took my breath away just like it always had. Unperturbed she continued talking, "You know, no one would be able to see it unless they got really close."

"I know." I told her gently. "But that's kind of what I wanted. I wanted every woman who got that close to you to know that you belonged to me." I couldn't believe that I had just told her that. Thankfully she didn't say anything about it.

"What about you? You never got my name on you. That wouldn't have been exactly fair." she was trying to make a joke but she was wrong. Oh so wrong.

I hopped up from the bed and turned the light on. Alison looked at me quizzically when I walked around the bed and I stood in front of her. She really looked confused when I hooked my fingers in the waistband of my panties and I wiggled them down a bit.

Relax cara." I laughed. I pulled one edge of my panties down and I showed her the tattoo that had lived there for the last three years. "I got this the night before our last fight. It was a surprise for you but I never got to show you. I could never bring myself to get it covered up. Not even when I got married."

I flinched a bit when Alison reached out to touch the tattoo. Her finger traced the cursive letters. The words Mrs. DiLaruentis were permanently marked on my right hip inside a heart.

"I can't believe you never told me." she whispered as her finger lingered a bit longer than necessary.

"Everyone I have been with since I left has known that my heart belongs to you." I grasped her hand and kissed it before I hopped back into the bed. There was an odd silence for a few moments before she spoke.

"You left me." She muttered. As if I hadn't remembered. It was my greatest regret by far. "It isn't fair for you to come and show that and pretend like nothing happened. You broke my heart."

I feel like you guys don't like this story much, so I might not continue with this story. Sorry guys I don't find this point any more. :/