I kiss boys

Hurting

The week is flying by really quickly. Zen had got really anxious on sunday and after we went out to eat he had me drive him back to his apartment. He hasn't talked to me since then and it's currently friday. I'm in my science class right now and Zen has the same class as me. Every now an then I would turn to look at him, but then realize he's already looking at me. I turn away really fast every time it happens. It's sort of a natural instinct. Back in high school before I came out to everyone I would always endlessly stare at the guys in my classes and most of the time they caught me and I would get used to turning my head away very quickly, so I guess I did it too many times that's it now a habit. Which is a bad thing because I should be confronting Zen not avoiding him. So, I told myself I would talk to him when class ended.  After class I stood up and marched over to Zen before he could collect his things and leave. "Zen?" I said sternly. He stopped packing up his things for a minute and then continued like nothing happened. "Zen? Seriously, what did I do?" This behavior was weird even for Zen. He only sighed. I grunted and turned my back to him. "Whenever you're ready to talk, come find me. You should know that I'm sorry for whatever happened. I thought you wanted to be friends. I guess I was wrong." I let my feelings slip out of my mouth without a care in the world. I hate when people ignore me. I left without another word.
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All my classes were over now so I headed back to my dorm. When I got out of my car I heard an unfamiliar voice call my name. "Hey, Ashtyn!" I turned around to see a group of guys coming out from behind the dorm building. "Uh, Yeah?" I looked around me to see if there was any other person that they could possibly be talking to, but nobody else was around. With a sigh, I walked closer to the group of athletic guys. "We heard that Zen has been messing with you. So, as a welcoming to our college we took care of it for you." He gave a devious smirk while his buddies did a synchronized laugh. I was confused, what did they do to Zen? "What do you mean?" I questioned. He looked back at his friends and then at me. "Let's just say he needs a little nursing to get back to normal." His smirk turned into a full on demon grin and his friends were grinding their knuckles into the palm of their other hand. "You beat him up!?" I was now way past angry. He only nodded and patted my back attempting to walk away, but I grabbed onto his shirt collar and pulled him close to my face. "I swear if you ever lay a hand on him again, you'll be the one getting beat up! Nobody messes with my Zen!" I wasn't even worried about what I was saying. I knew I just had to throw a threat out there somewhere so this boy knew I was serious. "Where is he?" I yelled in his face. "Behind the building." His face never showed any fear. He still had on a obnoxious smug demeanor. I pushed him off me and he stumbled into his group of friends. The last thing I saw was his friends gripping on to his arms and pulling up straight, but I could care less, I was already running as fast as I could to the back of the building. when I got there, Zen was crumpled up on the wet cement. He was holding his stomach and moaning. "Zen!" I cried and kneeled down beside him. "Ash?" He choked out. I placed my right hand on his cheek. "I'm sorry." He said. "For what?" I asked totally forgetting that an hour before he wouldn't even speak to me. "I was just afraid. I want to be your friend. I always have, but I didn't want you to have to deal with what I go through everyday." He struggled to get his words out. His lip was cut and blood was smeared all over his face. "You didn't want me to get involved in stuff like this?" I asked. "Yes, it wouldn't be fair." I could tell there was more to be said, but I knew he was holding back for a reason so I let it go. "Okay, come on. Lets go to the medical field." I carried him to my car and placed him in the seat. We drove to the building where the medical majors went to. When I first came to this college I had learned that the medical area was always open to injured college students plus its way cheaper. Possibly even free if Zen didn't have any broken bones. One of the students and a professional looked him over and told me he was to stay in the infirmary over night just in case. I sighed because I didn't want to leave him, but they wouldn't let me stay either. So, I got back in my car and drove to my dorm. I told the medical student that I would be back saturday morning to pick him up. All I had to do was wait it out. I went through every possibility in my head on why those jerks were beating Zen up, but I didn't have enough evidence to prove any of it. I began to get nervous and worried about Zen. Did he go through this everyday? I wondered why he got beat up when everyone basically worships him here. If one things for sure, its that no matter what, I was determined to figure out why Zen was being so strange before and now getting beaten to pulp.