Badboy Kisses

Chapter 20

The hardest thing ever it sitting next to the person you love and not being about to even look at them, because you know if you do your heart will crack into a million pieces again.

I'm staring at the teacher but my ears don't hear a thing, I don't hear anything except Olly's breathing next to me. The memories keep flooding back and I beginning to start to think if ending our relationship was a good idea. But then again if he missed me, he'd show it he'd fight for me. Maybe this is what he wanted, maybe he got sick of me and our relationship. Whilst deep in my thoughts I suddenly got jabbed my someone in the side. I look over to see Olly "The teacher's talking to you." He says not even daring to look me in the eye that hurt, a lot.  I clear my throat, "Jamie are you okay?" The teacher asks with kind smile. I nod "Yeah" my voice comes out so small I was hardly able to hear myself. The bell sounds and Olly grabs his stuff and is the first one out of the class. I walk out the back doors and into the yard. I was heading to a place I used to come to all the time with Olly inside the woods. I walk over to a spot and sit down. I sit there for a short while before I heard someone walking towards me. I turn around to see Olly walking with his head down so he can't see me. He has a blunt and a lighter in his hand along with his school bag. I suddenly hear the walking stop as he realises I'm sat there. I turn around and he's staring at me with the eyes that made me fall in love with him. "Can I sit down?" He asks. I nod and feel his presence next to me. We both don't say anything for a while until he does, "I miss you ya know." I feel a tear run down my face I turn to look at him and try to talk but the words just won't come out. "Don't cry." He wipes my tear away and we sit there staring at each other. "I love you." He whispers. I couldn't take this any more, I pulled away from him picked my things up and left him there. As I left he lit his weed, he hadn't done that on his own since before we knew each other.

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Hours later I was sat in my room watching Netflix and eating crap food, my mom was out with business so I had the house to my self. It's currently 7:30pm and I'm already in bed. By 9:00pm my eyes were hurting from the screen and I felt sick because of all the food. I decided to have an early night, I went to close the curtains and as I did, I saw Olly on his bed with another girl on top of him. I recognised the girl, she didn't go to our school but she lived a couple of streets away. I stood there staring at him with hatred and heartbreak. Once he saw my tears running down my face I suddenly closed the curtains and went to sleep. I knew he'd go back to his old ways, it was just a matter of time.

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The next few weeks went past in a blur, every night Olly had a new slut on top of him. To be quite honest, I was jealous that he was able to move on so fast. It was like he never really loved me, it seemed like when he was kissing other girls so passionately he forgot all about me and what we had. The worst thing was that I still loved him and I think I always would. I decided to stop moping around waiting for a boy that no longer loved nor cared about me. Amy said there was a party downtown that she could get us into. I agreed, I needed to let my hair down for once. "Are you sure your ready for this? I don't want to force you into anything." She said staring up at me from my bed. I nodded, applying some lipstick and putting my phone, money, fake ID and keys into my purse. "I need to get over him one day" I said looking at my self in the mirror. I was wearing a dark blue tight Lacey dress and nude heels. I had a smokey eye and my hair was in loose curls. I turned around facing Amy I looked behind towards the window and saw Olly notice me, he looked angry and shut the curtains. I stood there for a while staring at where his face was. "Come on let's go." Amy said dragging me out the room.

Once we arrived at the extremely loud, full of drunk people club I sat at the bar on my own. Amy met some guy and was dancing with him, I was happy for her. Her luck with men was the worst, they all either cheated of left. I don't understand why, she was a gorgeous girl with an amazing personality. "Hi can I have a soda?" I said to the bar guy he nodded. I took a sip of the soda and looked around the cramped club. It was full of people, not having a care in the world. Dancing like it was the last thing they'd ever do, kissing each other like their life depended on it. Not having a care in the world and enjoying the loud crappy music and the company of the person they loved. Maybe it was a mistake letting Olly go, I should've lived my life to the fullest whilst we still had time together. I had lost him now, there was no way of getting him back.

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"Woooo!!!" I screamed as I danced my ass off with an equally drunk Amy next to me. I decided to stop being a Scrooge and have a drink, looks like I had one too many. "Jamie I'm gonna go with Zac!!" She laughed. I had no idea who this guy was but I nodded and smiled like an idiot. "Can I have a vodka and soda please?" I asked the bar man and gave him the money. I stood on my own bopping my drunk head to the music. I saw Amy and went to make my way over to her. As I scuttled over I tripped over something I looked up to see it wasn't something but someone. "Whoops sorry" I looked up laughing. My smile dropped as I saw I have fallen for Olly. Literally. "Jamie you're drunk" A very sober Olly said as he took me to a seat next to the bar. "No I'm not am I not allowed to have some fun?! Looks like you did with all them sluts all over you but you didn't see me complaining then." I shouted above the music. "Jamie" he said he was lost for words and I wasn't surprised what was he meant to say to that. "Come on" he said getting up. "No I'm staying here" I said refusing to stand up." Olly closed his eyes taking a deep breath and did a very unexpected thing. He lifted me up and threw me on his shoulder. "Get the fuck off me!!" I shouted as I pounded his back. "Must say Jamie your arse looks amazing in this dress" he said. I rolled my eyes and stopped hitting him it obviously was to no point. Letting me go he put me in the passenger seat of his car and got into the drivers seat. I sat there in silent, honestly I was pissed off and upset with everything and even though I was drunk the feelings weren't gonna go away. "Hey" he said keeping his eyes on the road. "You okay?" I carried on looking out of the window. "No, but it's okay" I said. I was still drunk but I was trying not to be. "Jamie I miss you a lot you know." I shut my eyes. "No Olly you don't get to say that, you can't just fuck half the girls in the school and you can't just parade them in front of me at school and leave your curtains open for me to see. You can't make me feel like you never even loved me and say you miss me. Because it's not fair! Do all that shit and leave me in your past because that's how it's supposed to be. I broke up with you because I didn't want us to get more hurt when we went to college. But honestly it was the worst thing I ever did because I miss you more than ever and knowing your next door and so close but so far is killing me and I just can't handle it. But you can because you've moved on to dozens of other girls. But I haven't I'm still mourning over the memories we had and the kisses we shared. You just can't fucking say you miss me!" I shouted. The rest of the car journey was silent. I guess he didn't know how to respond and if I was him I wouldn't of known either. We arrived at his house to find no one home. I sat on his couch with my head in my hands for a good 30 minutes, I could feel Olly's gaze on me. "Jamie I miss you like crazy every single day I look threw that window that brings back the world of memories. I watch out for you at school to see if your okay. Those girls, they are nothing to me and they know that. All they were was a distraction from the real person that I loved because I thought you stopped loving me. I thought it didn't bother you that we weren't together anymore. I didn't mean to hurt you I could never do that to you because you were my first love of my life and you are nothing like the rest of the girls and I was proud to call you mine. And when you broke up with me it was like my world came crashing down, I went back to my old ways and everything went wrong again just like before I met you. You bring the goodness out of me and I thank you for it. I miss you like crazy and after all these months my love for you hadn't faded one bit." He was getting stressed as he was running his hands through his hair rapidly. I got up from the sofa and went over the arm chair he was sat in. I bent down to his level and kissed him. I kissed him like my life depended on it. I pulled away from him "I love you". I snuggled into his neck and fell asleep, maybe things could go back to the way they were. "I love you too" he said as he kissed my head.
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Omg hi!
Sorry for the late update I've been extremely busy with school recently and I've hardly had time to write it took me so long to write this chapter but it's a long one so I hope you enjoy it! I don't even know if anyone is even reading this anymore lol. But happy new year!! And if you celebrate I hope you had an amazing Christmas!!

Next update soon - bye xxx
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