Learn to love again

Chapter 10 Do you, Will you? Go out with me?

Jay's pov

As we began to walk towards Justins beach house, he intwined our fingers and began to play with them. Gentily rubbing my hand with his thumb. I leaned my head on his musculer shoulder, taking in the smell of his colon. I looked up to his face and be the way his brow was furrowed i knew he must be in deep thought, about what? I wondered. suddenly I stoped walking, jolting Justin's back to the present.

"what? What's wrongh?" he seemed throly confused, but i just couldn't take it any longer, i had to know.

"What are we, like are we dating, or what?" i question, he continued to play with my fingers, but his eyes were boring into mine.

"Jay, you don't know how much i want to go out with you, but it's just, i can't."

" YOU , can't so yu mean your just going to kiss me and say, 'were just friends.' What are you afraid of what the press will think when you have a girlfriend with bruises! Because if thats what you want then, Good BYE!" i was know furious with Justin, how could he just, just kiss me and then just wnat to be friends?

" Jay, you don't get it. I want to go out with you, so bad, it's just. I'm scard." He voice began to crack, this was a sid of JUstin i'd never seen befor. i wanted to feel sorry, to feel bad. But my nasty side came out and befor i knew it i was yelling.

" Your scard, Justin you don't know what scared is! i have been scard, i wake up in the moring just to be told i am a mistake, ugly, will die along, and i get beaten so hard sometimes it's only by the grace of god i'm still alive and you tell me your SCARD.! Don't try and give me that crap Justin!" i hadn't realized but i had started to cry, something i hated, expesaily in front, of people, but for some reason justin made me do thing i hated.

" Jay, i'm sorry about your mom, but you don't know what it's like, i mean the fans.." I caught him off befor he could finish.

"Justin, it's always going to be the fans, the fans will always come first so you know what? Were through before we've even started.!"

Justin's pov

As we began to walk towards mine and my moms beach house, i could aready smell the grill chese. I reached for Jay's hand intwining it in mine a gently began to fub her hand with my thumb sending samll shcok waves throught my body, like when you touch a light socked and it zaps you. when suddenly she stoped walk gerking me back to reality. she began to question me on why i hadn't asked her out yet. I was caught off gard and began to muble something about the fans, the presss, and how she would never be left alon. I knew they were stupid excuses but i didn't what to say. your scard. the stupid voice said and befor i could do anything those exact words left my mouth " I'm scard." Welll that did it i put her over the ege and she began to yell, and scream, and cry slow angry tears began to fall down her face, she ignored them and quept yelling i stood there in shock, what had happend to the girl i had been macking off with just a few minutes ago. that girl was gone, and this girl i didn't like. I my disper i mubled somthing about the fans, she yelled somthing i didn't her i was to intend on taking her in, her feature, her, her everything. She took off running, just like always, and i beging and i being madly in love, i followed right after her, suddenly i regreated everything i had said, i mean what would i think if i hadn't been famouse, if i didn't know what it was like and more than anything if i didn't have a loving mother and a father, just a call away.

No pov

Jay ran up the front steps, the wood slaming agaist the old rotten wood, until one board gave loose causing Jay to fall on her face, she bite her lip until it bleed. she wiped her bottem lip, still biting back teaars. She slamed the door,took off running up th the stairs ignoring her grandmother who stood in the kitchen.