Depressed | Phan {EDITING}

two

(edited)

"So what are you going to do today, Phil?" my mum asks me, opening up my curtains.

"I was just going to relax a bit," I reply, shrugging.

She sighs in disapproval, and begins to lecture me on the importance of studying and exams. Although, I quickly tune her out with thoughts of what I'm actually going to do today. Hopefully I'm going to be able to talk to Dan again.

"You've got your A Levels coming up soon, Phil. You really should be working on those instead of lounging around doing god knows what."

My mum has always been like this. All she wants is for me to get straight A's in everything and go to the most amazing university in England. She doesn't even consider for a second that I might not want to do any of that.

A consequence of this, besides the enormous workload, is that my wellbeing gets pushed to the side. She's never been the sort of mother I can go to with my problems, and she never will be.

"Fine," I mumble, lying through my teeth

"Good. I'm going out for the day, so I'll see you soon," she says, shutting the door behind her.

As soon as I hear the sound of the front door closing, I rush to pick up my phone and open my messages.

Phil: Hey!! What are you up to? \(*^▽^*)/

Dan replies almost immediately, causing my breath to catch in my throat.

dan: nmu

Phil: My mum wants me to study for A Levels but I've already studied so much this week ಥ_ಥ   

dan: ur 17? or 18?

Phil: I'm 17! v(=∩_∩=)ﾌ

dan: same

dan: i want to get to know you phil

I furrow my brow in confusion at his text. No one ever takes any sort of interest in me - so why now?

Phil: Why? (O.O)

dan: because i feel like you're the first friend ive ever had

As soon as I read the message, a wide smile spreads across my face and I start to feel giddy.

Phil: Aw that's so cute!! Thank you! x ★~(⌒‿⌒✿)

Phil: Well....

I suddenly feel stuck for words, unsure of how to describe myself. So, I start with the basics.

Phil: My name is Phil and I am 17 years old. My Birthday is on the 30th January. My favourite band is Muse and I'm allergic to cats? I also really like lions and I have a ton of house plants ヾ(〃^∇^)ﾉ

dan: you sound like a great person phil

Phil: Aha I'm nothing special ✿◕ ‿ ◕✿

dan: i hv 2 go

Phil: Oh okay

Phil: Bye! ヾ(＠＾▽＾＠)ﾉ

I frown a little at how suddenly he left, but shrug it off. I'm overthinking everything again.

***

PJ: Hey Phil, want to come round and have a video game night with Chris and me?

I smile at the fact that they remembered to invite me - for once - and quickly type out a reply.

Phil: Okay then ●‿● What time should I come?

PJ: Like... 7?

Phil: Sure, see you then (*^-^*)

I place my phone back onto my bedside table and look over at my desk to see piles of revision. How unappealing.