Resurgent

Chapter 3

You feel you are missing something in life? Well, guess what? You're not. Because I am sure that nothing sucks more than loving someone and seeing them die. I didn't actually see Tris die, but I could visualise it. David shot her, and I know he saw her die. Cara saw the CCTV footage, and I was passing by the room. I caught a picture of Tris. She was lying in the floor, in a pool of blood   as the life was sucked out of her. Of course I didn't - and couldn't - stand there and see the entire thing. But I had visions about that later on. So maybe seeing the footage increased my pain, my longing for Tris.

It hurt me more than usual that day. One year had passed since she was killed.

Enough, Four! My conscience yelled at me If you're going to be paralysed with grief like this, you ain't getting nowhere.

I am off to work in my car. The day is going just as it usually does. I go to my office where I have taken up the job of an self-defence trainer, and sure the job pays well; then I work for a few hours and get back home. I made some friends in here too. One of them is a guy one year younger to me, from the fringe, Colin. I never knew him back then, and he says he had chosen Erudite at the Choosing Ceremony. When I first met him, and he told me that, I looked at him with resentment. He must've noticed that, because he said that during the major attack when he learnt about Jeanine's plan, he left Erudite and became factionless.

He's working with me, except that I am a self defence trainer and he is an engineer. But we work in the same office , although in different departments.

"What's up, Four?" Colin greets me when I enter the office.
"Hi, Colin."
"You look sad. May I ask why?"
I shake my head and say ,"You Erudite people act politely and then just explode one day with the most evil plans of THE CENTURY!"
"Oh, my God, Four! I AM NOT ERUDITE! And you're not technically Dauntless, either,now that we are no longer in the fringe."
"Dauntless is in my blood. Nothing takes it away from me. Not even death."
"Oh," he says, "You're thinking about death. So that means you are apparently sad. Which thereby concludes to be-"
"Shut up, Erudite," I say.
"Erudite is in my blood, you see," he says with a smirk. I laugh. See , that's why I like Colin. He can make me laugh even on the day my love died.
"So, back to the point though," he says ,"Why are you sad?"
"Oh, it's just nothing. I'm not sad at all."
"Hmm.. Stop lying to me Four. We've been friends for nearly one year and I know you -"
An expression of realisation passes through his face. He knows about Tris, I often tell him about her.
"I'm sorry," he looks down ,"It's about Tris, isn't it ?"
I nod, but somehow I really feel like talking to him. Colin is like Zeke, I can share anything with him. The only difference between them is that I have been with Zeke longer than Colin.
"It's okay, you know. It's not your fault. So, just chill."
He raises his eyebrows and says ,"Um.. I wanted you to meet my girlfriend but apparently, not today."
"No, Colin, it's okay. Of course I am ready to meet her. What's her name?"
"Are you sure?"
"I am. Now tell me her name, young boy."
He smiles and replies quickly, "Cara."
My eyes nearly fall out of my sockets when I hear that name. I haven't met Cara since She and Caleb broke up, and I am not in touch with her. And then, I wasn't expecting to hear that name in a while.
"Cara? Cara what?"
Before he can reply, Cara comes to meet us.
"Four?" She looks at me ," What are you doing here?"
"Hey, Cara," I say ,"I work here. I heard you and Caleb broke up? And Colin is your boyfriend now?"
"Yeah, well, Caleb wasn't the best boyfriend ever. Maybe we weren't meant to go on, so I decided to break up. And yes, Colin here, is my boyfriend."
"Okaaayyy, " Colin says, completely shocked to see us talking like we're friends ,"So you guys seem to know each other."
"Yes, " Cara says ,not takin her eyes off me, "I am Four's girlfriend's brother's ex."
Colin mutters, "Four's girlfriend was Tris. Her brother must be Caleb, so..."
"Right, Coli," she says, planting a quick kiss on his lips ," I gotta go."
"Bye, love." He says to her, and then turns to me, "What do you think?"
"I know Cara. She's a nice girl, maybe a little too nice for you. Never thought a person like you would get her," I say, laughing,
"Four!" He punches me slightly in the arm and I go away laughing.

I go to my cabin (guess what, even I have a cabin!) and sit down on the sofa.   Naturally undoing have any work right now, so I let my thoughts wander. And each time i let then, they flutter to Tris. One year, and I haven't heard anyone call me Tobias. One year and no one's presence has been as comforting as hers. One year, and my soul is still wandering in search of her, any part of her. Her house in Abnegation was destroyed, all of her stuff was left behind when we moved here. Maybe I should have had that serum. At lest I would have forgotten everything, and there would not be that much of pain.

Then again, as Christina said, I wouldn't remember Tris, and what would be the point of life after that?

Tris, I try to talk to her, even if it is her spirit, My ears ache with longing to hear you all me Tobias just one more time.

"Tobias?" A voice says. My head jerks up in astonishment. Did she actually reply? Oh, my God, my heart is racing a hundred miles per minute.
Tris!

"Tobias Eaton," that voice says again , "Hello?"
That voice? It's not Tris'. I open my eyes, and see my boss standing in front of me with a quizzical look on his face.
"Jerome?" I say ,"I mean... Boss?"
"Call me Jerome, actually. Hey, I just learnt your name is Tobias."
"What?!"
"Isn't it?"
"How do you know, Jerome? No one here knows that!"
"It's a.. Very nice name. Uh, I accidentally checked your phone. And in your contacts was a person Tobias. The contact picture was yours, so.."
"Accidentally?"
"Yeah, well, I used it to call."
I raise an eyebrow, sure that he is faking a reason.
"Okay, fine," he says ,"I really thought your name was weird. So I wanted to know your real name. No one knew, so I checked your phone."
I really can't think of him as a boss, because Jerome is my age, and a good friend, too. Also, he is more like a kid when you compare him to me, but he's excellent in his job. He's a terrible liar, and if you believe his lies, then I'd say you are a person who doesn't know how to lie, either.
"Jerome, seriously? Why?"
He shrugs and says ,"Because, the other day I met a beautiful little blondie in the office and she asked me if I knew a person by the name of Tobias Eaton. I was searching for him, and it turns out, it's you."
My ears perk up on hearing his description. As far as I know, no beautiful little blondie I know, knows my real name, except..
"What was her name?"
"Uh..." He says, thinking, "Something like...Tris?"