Resurgent

Chapter 16

"Tris, I am sorry," I say whole-heartedly. I feel horrible.

She doesn't say anything. I know she's hurt, but I can't do anything. I feel like a traitor. But, it wasn't my mistake, and I had no control over it.

"I am sorry, I didn't even...like..." I stammer. Somehow, I can't get myself to speak properly.

"It's okay," she finally says,"It wasn't your mistake."

And then she adds, fuming ,"But if I ever meet that Lucy girl, she's going to get a black eye from me."

"The other one from me," I assure her. Immediately, the mood in the room lightens and I am so relieved. I know for one thing that losing Tris might be my new fear.

I lean in to kiss her and she kisses me back. Instinctively, I place my hand on her left cheek and she places her's on the back of my neck. She presses her lips against mine harder, But pulls back after a few minutes.

"I love you so much," she whispers to me. It is these moments that I cherish. There are the moments that I live for, that I actually realise how blessed I am to have a person like Tris in my life.

"Couldn't possibly love you more," o reply, in a little more than a whisper.

There is a moment of silence and then I look straight into her blue eyes, the eyes that made me fall in love with her. Those eyes that I see everyday in my dreams, those eyes that I die to be with everyday.

A smile creeps up onto her lips and she says,"Stop staring at me, flirty!"
I look away and say,"I was never staring at you."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Uh-huh."

Tris smiles at me. It's a beautiful and perfect smile. She pulls my cheek and says,"Cutie!"

That sound very weird to me, because people have called me 'muscular' or 'hot' or 'macho' but never 'cute'. But the again those are people and this is Tris.

"I'm not CUTE!" I protest.
Tris laughs and gets off the bed. She goes to shower as I lay in bed, thinking. And I know I'm super confused.

We go to visit Christina. I knock on her door and she opens it. I look at her with a smile and say,"Congratulations? Is that what I should be saying?"

She punches me playfully in the arm and says,"Maybe. But I don't care."

We get in, and somehow, the way I look at her is not the same anymore. It's all different, I don't see her as I saw the brave and daunting Christina- now I see her as a fragile Christina who is carrying a baby. It's weird.

But when we talk to her and everything, she's still the same. If I wasn't aware of the fact that she is pregnant, I'd never even know.

"So, when did you learn that you were pregnant?" I ask her as casually as possible.
"When Tris came over that day." She is blushing slightly, and that's not very Christina-like.

She and Tris struck a conversation about some feminine topic that I couldn't- and didn't want to-get involved in. One hour later, we leave her place.

We walk down from Christina's house to a nearby sushi restaurant that I have always loved. It's just so cool. We get into it and have our lunch as I look into her eyes. They aren't blue anymore, like they were- now they're black.

Yet, they are so mesmerising, so Tris, so beautiful. They still have that glow in them, like they're always sparkling and she has a smile in her eyes, if that is possible.
"You are so beautiful," I say to her. She looks wowed, and I know that's because she was saying something and I wasn't paying attention. But I also know that she doesn't mind because I was admiring her.
"Thank you," she says, exaggerating the two words. I can tell her cheeks are red. That is why I like her so much- she's so nice without ever trying to be. It's like an inherent characteristic, something that has perhaps been passed down the family line. But even as I say that, I know it's not true, because Caleb is nothing like Tris. A guy who can sacrifice his sister for some leader is not a good person, let alone a good brother.

I had always wanted to be a brother, but that dream was stolen from me Evelyn. She left me alone with Marcus. Even today, when I have everything I could possibly wish for, I still feel the absence of a sibling. But, when I come to think of it, if I had a brother, he'd be Abnegation, left with Marcus when I chose Dauntless and then I'd play the role of Evelyn for him or her. And maybe that sibling wouldn't have been able to survive the war. So maybe, whatever happens, happens for good. But whatever it is, a sibling would've been a great help for me to get through my dreadful days at Abnegation.

"Tobias?" Tris snaps her finger right in front of my face
"What?" I say, suddenly snapping out of my daze.

"I've been talking to you and you have been muttering something. Are you okay?"
"Yep, I'm perfectly fine," I say.
"Good. So as I was saying..."

And then Tris starts rambling on for hours without stopping even for a minute. I try to listen to her but I do get carried away once in a while.

And this is my Tris. I love her beyond explanation.