Chapter twenty six

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CHAPTER TWENTY SIX

JOHANNA

'Just let me hear her voice! I need to hear her with my own ears!' I wept to Aiden, losing count of the times I had done before, this week alone.
'We have to stay cautious, Johanna, you can speak to Garnet when she is fit to come home.' Aiden kept calm, repeating what he had been saying for a while now.
I hadn't spoke to Garnet for so long, the memory of her voice was surely fading. She had a boy and named him Gabe, short for Gabriel. After an emergency cesarean she contracted a staph infection and had to stay until she was fully healed. I seen a photo of Gabe the week before and was overcome with so much joy from seeing his tiny body wrapped up in a blue blanket, but there wasn't a photo of Garnet and I was worried they weren't telling me the whole truth about her condition.
'Please, just be patient my love. You will see her soon I promise.' Aiden soothed as he wrapped his strong arms around me before I left to do my duties.

I had barely pulled a weed whilst gardening in the vegetable patch when I finally gave up and sat under a tree. George had been watching me from his post and slowly wandered in my direction, then finally reaching me and sitting beside me.
'I hate to see you cry, Jo.' He whispered, pulling my wet fringe from my sticky face.
'I can't help it anymore. I don't know anything anymore and it makes me so unhappy.' I choked out through my sobbing.
I looked up to find George tearing up himself, and wiped the newly formed tear about to fall down his cheek.
'Don't you cry too, or I won't stop at all!' I joked, making us both chuckle and look down at the swaying grass on the ground.
'I love you, Jo.' George finally admitted after a few minutes of silence.
'I love you too, George.' I sighed.
'If we weren't here, and in the outside world with no one to tell us anything, do you think we could be together?' George pulled at the grass nervously as he asked me.
'Perhaps, if none of this ever happened, and I wasn't married to Aiden.' The sound of my husbands name made George quiver with anger and fear.
'What if it did, and we just tried to forget it and start a new life together?'
'I don't understand what you're getting at George?'
'I mean, I want you to leave with me. I want us to go far away from this place and start over. I can't stand another day of your over exerted depression.' George by now had stood up, pulling me up with him and walked me to the edge of the meadow. My heart pounded in fear, hoping this was all a weird dream, but as the bushes thorns on the commune fence stuck to my calfs and dug into my skin I knew I was awake.
'George what are we doing?' I whispered, my breaths as fast as his.
'Were leaving.' He whispered back, pulling at the bush, revealing the Forrest through a hole in the fence.
'I can't. I'm sorry.' I started to cry again, taking a step back.
George looked around to make sure no one had noticed us yet, then fixed his eyes to mine. For a moment I considered a life on the run with him, the way he stared at me was the way Aiden did when we first met. Before another thought could appear George had pushed his body closer and pressed his lips firmly against mine, his hands caressing my cheeks. I didn't stop him, and relaxed as I felt the soft warm embrace his big lips gave, pushing every wonder I had ever had about how they felt to the surface and giving me complete satisfaction.
The fireworks in my heart didn't last long when my thought and reason came back into play. How could I have let him take this so far?
I pushed him away and pressed my hand to my steaming forehead.
'That shouldn't have happened! None of this should be happening!' I stuttered.
'Please, Johanna, we have to get away from this place, we have to be free!'
'No, I can't. I've made promises to this place I intend on keeping. I'm sorry George.' I ran as fast as I could back to the commune and dropped to my knees in front of Aiden who was looking for me. Once the words came out that George was leaving I regretted saying it at all. If I had of kept quiet he wouldn't be in the chamber awaiting purgatory, and I wouldn't have the guilt of another life on my hands.

'You didn't have a relationship with him did you?' Aiden spoke in the darkness as we laid together in bed, wide awake.
'My heart is only for you, my love.' I squeezed my eyes shut from the surreal pain in my chest.
'Good, I was worried you might love him.' Aiden sighed in relief, before turning over to sleep.
'Of course not sweetie.' I whispered, kissing the back of his head and turning over as well. The pain in my chest intensified as the lie I just told was set in stone. I did love him, and I even considered leaving with him, but now he was gone and it was my fault.

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