Starting Over (An Andy Biersack Love Story ){sequal To Secrets}

Chapter 6: Memories Are the Beauty To It All

Andy's PoV
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After a week of just taalking to Alice, today was her day to come out of the hospital, and honestly, I don't think any of us want to leave.

We don't want to go out to the mob of fans and reporters that are trying to bust through the front doors of the hospital. Jamie and Journee were more than irritated by it than anyone, because let's just say it's hard to deal with them like this.

Katelynn and Copeland came to the hospital and met Alice. Katelynn told Alice, "I wish you were Kellin's actual sister. Your so nice!" We were actually all surprised by this. It made us realize how much Alice has changed without her memory. I still want it to come back and make her more ammune to the world, so she doesn't get snatched by someone who says they know her.

And, of course, I'm the most paranoid of the situation of letting Alice leave, if you can't already tell. I don't want something like this to happen to Alice again. Jinxx was the person to be right behind me on that one. I never even knew he wanted to adopt Alice. Let alne anyone else. I mean, sure they talked before and everything, but they were always really the ones to bond over being a hermit.

Jake was acting more and m9ore like her brother each day, and even CC was calm enough to be a brotherly-ish best guy friend to her. I guess Ash would be one of those guys Alice could go to for, "relationship problems." Ash was getting more and more into the idea of an actual idea of a relationship himself. Alice was going to pick out the first girl he would go out with because she knows everything about him now. Literally. Ash even got her into Hello Kitty! I still kept her with Batman. . .

Her parents were going to reveal a lot of things to her, a lot of things she didn't know before either. Jinxx has talked to the agency about the signing of papers for Alice's custody, and Jinxx is going to be a great father. He already got me handled by saying, "Andy, I know you're in love with Alice, and everyone can see that," and he laughed, and then continued on. "But if you hurt her under my watch, I'll make sure you'll never be able to have kids." He scared the living hell out of me, and I'm pretty sure I want kids when I'm older, thank you very much.

And actually, a lot of the bands had come down to see us. Even Pierce the Veil who weren't even playing Warped this year decided to come down. I think it was just concern for Alice after Kellin claimed her as his new sister. Even if it was playful. I still can't stop replaying what happened last month when I kissed Alice and she ran off, and then Kellin found her. What the hell was I thinking when I thought they were in a relationship?! I mean, I know I was a jealous and worried wreck at the time, but I'm still embarrassed I thought Kellin had made a move on her.

"Hey man," Vic said, sitting next to me on the bed. He knew about me barely sleeping, and he was the only one who tried to get me to sleep. "How many hoours from today?" He means how many hours of sleep did I get today or last night. And to be honest, I've only had arounf 72 hours of sleep out of the whole month. Even when I was on tour I slept for a ood amount of time.

I sighed.

"Not hours at all. I only got 57 minutes of sleep." It was true. I would look at the clock right before my lids closed and then I'd wake up and count the time. Vic made me do it because, "You can go into an extremely bad coma, Andy. It's been a month - a month - and you can go into a coma for not sleeping for weeks." And it was true. I looked it up. Even the doctor of Alice told me to get some rest, but I just couldn't and I don't know why. But, I'm really tired all of the time, and sometimes Alice would just stare at me, and tell me to go to bed, because she's fine now and she doesn't have to have me hovering over her eyelids when she wakes up. I would just laugh, and force myself to sleep. Her, Vic, the doctor, and Kellin and Katelynn were the only ones concerned with my sleeping. I still stayed in the bed, and everyone else crashed in the lobby, in the chairs in here, or outside on the benches.

Jamie, Katelynn, the doctor, and Jessica would kick all the guys out so Alice could take a shower or change each day. Her ribs are almost healed, and her legs will need to take it slow, and her arms are fine, but she needs to wear bandages around her ribs for a few more weeks. Me and her had went on one other date, and I'm a litle amused she decided to go down to the cafeteria sometime last week for our sefcond date. I told her everything about the first date, and she jut smiled. Now, we were in her room talking before we leave, and she was laying in the bed of white sheets. I think she still wants her memory back, because every time I look back over, she's in such eep thought, and I think a few memories came into her head about her paintings, because she told me about her dream she had yesterday.

"I remember painting this girl in a wheat field, and she looked so beautiful. Who was she?" Now, remember when Alice had told me she painted herself in that image? Well, she looks very different now.

Her body was more skinny and frail, but she was just a petite figure now. She wasn't that skinny. Her dark long hair fell down to her waist now, and her eyes are a full black now. The iris is just black. No brown glows in thenm anymore, but the black is more welcoming than the darkness I've ever seen. And her fingers are longer and skinnier, but she likes to fiddle with a lot of things with them now. Her cheeks are more hollow, but slightly chubby, and she grew two inches from her height. Hey, she's sixteen, and still growing!

"She's you," I explained to her. She looked more in thought for a moment then smiled.

"I guess I am being selfish if I think I was more beautiful then than now," and she started to twiddle with her fingers again. I grabbed one of the hands and felt a burning sensation shoot through my arm. Cheesy, I know. But it's so true! It's like sparks, but then it's like every spark that shot into the air, ran back down my arm and melted, and I couldn't hlp but feel a smile etch across my face.

"You are not selfish, because you aren't her anymore. You're a different person than you were before. You carry all the same traits, but you've changed."

"Then what was I like before?" I gulped down. What was she like before? I shook my head at her.

"I wouldn't be able to explain it to you. You were just more bolder with everything and more shy." She laughed and nodded her head.

"I'm still very shy Andy. It's just I'm getting more and more familiarity with everyone now, and I just have this feeling in my chest that I can trust you guys." i smi8led and grabbed her other hand. We were the only ones in the hotel room, and I remember Ashley making everyone get out to go and grab some Burger King down the block. But before he left, he winked at me and then darted out the door. That was when I knew he had planned this. . .

What fazed me the most, was that Alice was perfectly fine. She wasn't sad or scared, or in depression like most people after they've had Amnesia take over their mind after a car crash. She was just perfectly sane. And I knew there was something she needs to say about it.

"Hey Alice?" She looked p from our hands. Her smile and eyes made me just want to forget about the whole question.

"Hm?" She hummed.

"Why does it seem like your running from saddness? Most people would be ripping their hair out from this situation." She smiled and pulled me closer and hugged me. I was shocked. But I didn't hesitate to hug her back, I just wrapped my arms around her tightly and combed my fingers through her hair. Her hair was so long, and she'd braid it every night to make it wavy.

Then, I felt it. I felt a small drop of wetness on my neck. The side where Alice's face was. Was she crying? She can't be. I can feel her smile in my neck.

"Andy," she said in a soft whisper. It was right near my ear so I could hear her perfectly. "I think this is a sign that I have to keep from my past, and lok more forward to the future." She pulled away, and that same ghostly smile was across her perfect lips.

"Why do you want the memories to come back then, if you're just running from the past that holds them all?" I asked her confused, while cupping both hands on her cheeks and wiping away her unknown tears.

"Sometimes, you need memories to keep you going Andy. Because without them, you'd have to start from the beginning of your exsistence. I'm not running, I'm starting over."