My Boyfriend's(?) Roommate

Chapter 20: Look up before you act

The next day was spent alone in the living room, watching sad romance movies, stuffing my face with popcorn and cookie dough ice cream.

I was expecting to be able to vent all my problems onto Zoe, but she had really wanted to go see Alfie. He had just come back from a short holiday to his family's house, so Zoe hadn't seen him in a whole week. If I wasn't feeling so down, I would have loved to have met Alfie. Zoe really seemed to care about him, and I still needed to give him the if-you-hurt-her-I-will-track-you-down talk. But I did have a good feeling about this guy, Zoe talked so passionately about him. But still I wouldn't let Zoe get hurt the same way I was.

I was hurting badly. Joe. We never did define our relationship. I shouldn't be upset that he was seeing other girls. I just thought that maybe our date meant something to him. But apparently not. He had arranged a date with another girl the day after our date.

I didn't know anything anymore. Was that that even a date? Was there even a relationship to define anymore? I was just done with relationships. My first attempt was a failure. Should I expect anything more from any relationship?

That's when I heard the doorbell go. Zoe was back early, but I was glad. She was probably the only person who could stop me thinking sad thoughts. I rushed to the door and ran into her arms. But it was weird. I couldn't feel Zoe's chest. It was strangely flat. I looked up to question Zoe. But Joe was there instead.

Maybe me running into his embrace was some kind of sign that I wasn't actually mad at Joe, because his face had that stupid smug Cheshire cat grin. I was in a state of confusion and embarrassment, but after a while I immediately stepped back.

He grinned "It's nice to know I still have that effect on you." Referencing the blush on my entire face, then when I didn't reply he took that as confirmation. Even if I was angry enough to make little voodoo dolls of Joe and throw them around, Joe was right. He did still have that effect, even though his player ways should have changed my feelings they didn't. I still like Joe. A lot.

"Are you still mad at me then?" He asked me.

"Are you still seeing other girls?" I asked in response

"Uh..I've been thinking about you."

"That wasn't my question Joe."

"Before you chop off my testes, can you let me explain?"

"No." I slammed the door shut in his face again.

"Please {your name}"

"No Joe! I don't want to hear it. Why should you have to explain? You should have just been able to say no I haven't been seeing other girls. But you can't. So as of right now, I don't want to hear it." Getting emotional my tears started to fall again. My voice slightly breaking I continued "Just leave Joe. Don't come back."

As I heard his footsteps walking away, he left me with one final phrase.

"I don't have the right to say this, but please believe me when I say I love you {your name}."

Then when his footsteps could no longer be heard, I started to cry out loud, cursing Joe's name. I was crying because I wanted to believe Joe. I was crying because if I went outside now and ran after him, my heart would be broke again. But beyond repair. I was crying because I still liked Joe.

I wouldn't wish this kind pain on my worst enemy. There were no visual scars or bruises. That's what made it worse. You couldn't just put a plaster on, or take painkillers, there was no cure. All of this pain was my fault. What was I thinking falling for a player like Joe? I laughed to myself in-between sobs. I was a fool.

That was when the doorbell went again. Did Joe come back? Should I take him back? I let the doorbell ring a few more times, before actually deciding I would NOT take Joe back. I opened the door and pushed Joe back.

"Just leave me alone!" I screamed

"I-I'm sorry, I-"

That didn't sound like Joe's voice. I looked down at the shocked figure on the floor. I was expecting Joe, but strangely my heart didn't fall when I saw Caspar. It was Caspar I just pushed. God I really needed to look up before I acted.

~~~

   ❤ ~~~Caspar's welcome back party ~~~❤  

Me: It took 20 chapters but you're finally back!!!

Caspar: Oh yeah! Congrats on 20 chapters and almost 600 reads! 

He pulls me into his embrace

Me: *Dies* 

Caspar: *Laughs*

Me: * Comes back to life* I have to thank you beautiful readers who have shown my story so much love!!! Caspar thank them too! 

Caspar: *Kisses every reader*

Reader: *Dies* 

Me: *Mutters under my breath* Wish I was a reader too...

Caspar: Aww *kisses my cheek*

Me: *Dies x10*

Caspar: Don't worry she'll be back to write the next chapter!