This Is Our Second Skin (Frerard)

24: Somebody To Love

*above picture is of Gerard's dress*

"I can't - please Frank, I'm just...I need a drink, or a brain transplant, or something," Gerard babbled, his mouth spitting out words without any thought being put into what he was actually saying, he was too panicked to bother with that right now. "Did you see all of the people, there is so many of them, oh god - I'm going to fuck up."

Gerard knew he was overreacting, full on diving off the deep end actually, but he couldn't help it, not after he had gotten a good view of the large amount of people filling the small club, and the sheer numbers had astounded him, as well as driven him into the hysterical state he was currently in. Gerard came here every Wednesday night, so he had assumed he knew what to expect, but the fact that this was a special event had slipped his mind, apparently everyone else had remembered though if the dense swarm of bodies in the main room was anything to go by.

"Honey, come here," Frank ordered, one of his eyebrows rising up sternly when Gerard didn't move from his hunched over position in the corner, "please?" That got Gerard in action, because he could never ignore that pleading tone when it came from Frank, not even when he was on the verge of an anxiety attack.

"I'm sorry, I'm okay...I think." Gerard's legs trembled as he reached Frank's side, but as soon as Frank wrapped his arms around Gerard's dress covered frame, he felt himself relaxing, his lungs finally allowing some oxygen to enter them without any resistance in the way for the first time in far too long.

"I know you are scared Gerard, but it's going to be okay, I've got you," Frank murmured soothingly, one his hands pressing against the back of Gerard's head, encouraging him to bury his face in Frank's neck so he couldn't focus on anything besides the sweet smell of the perfume Frank had sprayed on the both of them earlier.

Gerard had been doing a pretty decent job of not freaking himself out until about thirty minutes ago, the preparation for the big night of their performance had kept his mind occupied from the fact that this was actually happening, that he was going to perform on stage dressed in drag, but now that there was nothing to do but wait for their turn, Gerard was quickly losing his slippery grip on his anxiety, and he honestly wasn't sure if he was going to be able to make it to their show time without having a breakdown.

But he couldn't do that, not after he had come so far, not after Frank had put so much work into this; Gerard refused to let his boyfriend down, but that was easier said than done, and Gerard wasn't sure how to calm his nerves besides drinking himself into a stupor, but he knew that was a bad idea, even without the disapproving looks he had received from Frank when he had been eyeing the bar longingly earlier.

"When do we go on again?" Gerard asked, his words muffled against the soft fabric of Frank's dress, but he was unwillingly to move just yet, because for the first time all night, Gerard felt safe, protected even, and maybe if he stayed in this position until their names were called, he could do this after all.

"Maybe half an hour, you are almost there honey," Frank responded in a soothing tone of voice, his body swaying back and forth minutely as he held Gerard as close to him as humanly possible.

"Okay, that's not too bad, I just...I think I need to sit down," Gerard gasped out when he made the mistake of lifting his head up, a glimpse of the crowd filling his vision for a split second before he hastily looked away again.

"Don't pay attention to them honey, just focus on me, listen to my voice," Frank whispered as he led Gerard to a nearby bench, tactfully situating their seating arrangements so Gerard's back was turned to the mass of people behind them, making sure he could only view Frank unless he craned his neck around, which he definitely wasn't going to do. "See, that's better right?" Frank asked warily, his eyes dancing over Gerard in a nervous manner as he spoke.