I love her

My life is changing

We started dating it January on the 10th. Phone calls were exchanged, messages were sent, we would fight over who loved who more, we would call every night, saying goodnight and that we loved each other.
It was a long distance relationship, we couldn't see each other, her mom wouldn't let her come over and my mom was to busy to take me over there.

I still remember the day we broke up, February 9th 1 day before our 1m anniversary.
It was horrible, I don't even remember why we were fighting, probably something stupid, but I do remember watching a movie...

I believe me and my mom were watching knocked up, I was texting Ashli, we were fighting when I called her, I went to my room, crying, and we talked, I hung the phone up a few times, then called again.
I said something that I regret, my mom made me believe it, mom told me tht she was just like her dad, "stupid, immature, cheater, heartbreaker." I believed it, I believe everything she says.
I told her she was just like her dad, then told her it was over. I cried and cried and cried. My mom got me and brought me to the front room, she got ice cream and we started watching stand by me. Worst day of my life.

I remember when I was at my grandpas with my older cousins, Sidney and Lacie, and my younger one, Larissa.
We were dating, I called her and my cousin Sidney was I the room, I put her on speaker.
My cousin is mental, she didn't know that her parents didn't know that she was dating me, so she kept talking about it, I texted her while we were on the phone explaining why she was doing it, and she felt so bad afterwards.
But the thing I remember most about that day is...

"Ashli what's wrong?" I ask her because she sounded sad.
"Nothing," She answered.
"Where's your happy voice?" I smile, trying to make her laugh.
"My happy voice..." She goes silent for a minuet.
"Ashli?" I ask.
"I can't find my happy voice..." She answers, while crying.
"No Ashli please don't cry it'll be okay," I answer trying not to cry myself.
"I can't find my happy voice," he voice goes higher, it happens when she cries.
She hangs up the phone making me get worried.
I end up crying, with my cousin trying to cheer up. I didn't know what to do!
She texted me later, saying sorry she hung up that her step dad was coming. I didn't believe her, I still don't.

I love her so fucking much, she doesn't understand tht when I say that, I mean it.

I love her.