The shock on my face stays there even when Zayn is hugging me, once he releases me and tries talking to me. As soon as I get back to the right mind I hug him again, this time holding him tightly, enjoying the moment I've been waiting for so long. Everything I've dreamed of and more. This just might be the best day of my life.
"How did you get in? When did you come? What are you doing here? " I started pouring out questions when I felt it was getting awkward just standing there in his arms.
"I came here like 5 minutes ago, I tried calling you but you didn't pick up and the door was unlocked, so I decided to wait for you here" This obviously means he doesn't know that I was missing for like two weeks. It doesn't matter right now. I am just so happy that he is here, whatever the reason. It's just that I can't hold my curiousity and have to actually ask what he is doing here.
"I thought you were touring some continent right now? " A smile spreads across my face. He found time to meet me.
"Well, we just finished touring Europe a few days ago, so we have a week off and I decided to visit my best friend in the whole world."
"Well that's nice! What comes next? How long are you gonna stay here in the UK? "
"Just a few more days, unfortunately. And next up is the USA, which I am so freaking excited about!" And Zayn clearly is excited, he is almost jumping.
" That's so awesome, you can't even imagine how happy and proud I am. And I'm glad you found time to visit me, now I wanna hear every detail of what happened during your Europe and UK tour" I say generally interested. When it comes to talking about me being kidnapped or Zayn having fun on tour when he's only here for who knows how long exactly, I'd rather hear what Zayn has to say.
" It's just so much fun you know. Being in a different country almost every night, seeing all the support in the concerts. It just feels amazing. To have people scream and shout when I start singing my lines. it's unbelievable. I love travelling. Oh and you know how we had the X Factor tour as well?
"That's so awesome that you're enjoying what you are doing. Yeah, I've seen the one of the UK with you performing. What about it?
"If I remember well I did not tell you this yet. I got a girlfriend" Zayn's face is lit up by his smile while my heart shatters to tiny pieces. I do my best to contain my tears that are threatening to stream down my cheecks any time. To my surprise I manage to do that and my mouth does not open in shock. It makes sense, he's an amazing guy, his eyes are masmerizing, why wouldn't he have a girlfriend?
It's just how sudden this news came to me. I hide my surprise as well as I can while he continues.
"Her name is Perrie, we met backstage at the X Factor, she's just such a sweetheart. At first I had doubts if I should even start a relationship as I am basically never home, never even in the same country for a longer period than 3 months. It's just that someone once told me to listen to my heart if I don't know what is right and what is wrong. My heart told me to go into that relationship and I'm in love, Rebecca, we're so in love. It's just too bad that I don't get to see her as often as I wish. I am so grateful that I have you and can tell you all of this stuff. "
You know when in the movies they always show how girls have gay best friends? Well that is how I feel right now, like I am that gay friend who could not possibly have feelings towards this person. I wasn't even sure how I felt about him when I first started writing these letters, but then once I didn't even know how much longer I'd be alive, I realized what a big part of my heart he has taken. It just doesn't feel right. I don't think I have the right to be heartbroken, we've always been only friends. I've never given him any idea that he could be more.
And here I am, my heart aching, I am trying to stop my chin from shaking by biting my tongue and inner cheeck. It helps but does not stop me from crashing the letter I had in my hand into a ball. Zayn notices it and asks me:
" What's that you are holding? " Lord help me now.
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Letters to Zayn
FanfictionA journey of a 19-year-old who is in love with a famous band member Zayn Malik. They've known each other since childhood, but Rebecca never had the courage to tell Zayn the way she feels about him. She finds that the best way to do so is writing let...
