Suicide Baby

8. Just One Gunshot.

In the morning when Alex woke up, Lyne wasn't there. His room, just like is heart had become empty again. All there was, was a note, with the writings,

"I am really sorry for what happened last night, can we please act like last night didn't happen? You know, right, how much I need you? I know, I love you, right? You are my best friend, and you'll always be that to me. We've always been together, you have always been there for me, so for this last time, just be there. Just fucking be there. I need you right now. See, I've been going through a lot lately, and at nights, when everything gets so silent, there are these voices in my head which make me stab myself because I feel numb. You know, what stops me from cutting deeper? You. You make me feel like there is something left for me to live for,you you and you. It has always been you. I really need you with me. I am so sorry for everything that has ever happened, especially last night. I'm sure a kiss doesn't have the power to ruin our friendship, I mean it was just a silly little kiss, it meant nothing. So just be there. I have the gun. If possible just meet me today at our place, I'll be waiting.

                                                                                                                                            Your bestfriend,

                                                                                                                                                       Lyne."

'It obviously meant nothing, the kiss,' Alex spoke. If only he had known how Lyne's stomach knotted inside her when she wrote down that lie. Oh, it meant the world to her, that kiss. Maybe that's why she had waited, that's why Alex was her first. 

On the other hand, there was Lyne, sitting on a park bench right opposite to her father's house. The gun was in her bag. So many thoughts raging her head at once, so mane questions and doubts. Should she? or should she not? Will she really be free if she kills him? If she gets arrested, what would her mother do? Would Alex be in trouble too? She sat there. While the whole world around her moved with the speed of light, people and their routine. School children rushing to school, men and women rushing to their jobs and destinations. Everyone in this endless race against time, with failing efforts to save what's already fading away. With the false belief that someday everything will be alright. People running because sometimes running helps then forget about their problems. While the whole world ran, she sat there. Still as a statue. What to do what not to do?

Would it be good if she actually stayed with her father? But why should she. She felt like crying, but she didn't. She had already cried enough. So much, that now she felt dry, from the inside, empty. Hollowed. 

She lifted her head, and right across the road was her father's house's front door. One knock and one gun shot. 

No one would even know, would they?

Lyne got up, she looked around her, was anyone watching her? No. She moved on.

She pulled her hood up covering her face, trying to be as unnoticed as possible. She crossed the road. Walked through the drive way, past the lawn and there she was. Infront of the door. Just one doorbell away from disaster. She reached her hand out, one striking finger  on the switch. But still she didn't press it. 

She stood there, looking at the door, trying to peep through the peep hole. By this time the gun was inside the pocket of her jacket, hidden. Her right hand clasping the gun tightly, waiting to pull it out and pull the trigger. Her left hand still on the bell, waiting to press it, or not press it. 

A few sighs of giving up hope. And she pushed the bell. 

The sound of the bell echoed inside the whole house. 

She stood there in absolute silence. Her mind being wretched by the waves of memories, her mother, Alex, was she doing the right thing.

She could hear footsteps moving towards the door. The door opened. A young lady in her late 20s opened the door, that was her father's present lover. She called for her father.

Lyne was shattered by the name she was called. While going inside, the lady called out loud for her father saying, 'Honey, that daughter of yours has come'.

Lyne stood there. After about half a minute, her father came near the door.

'What are you doing here right now, Lyne? Don't you have school?', said the man who didn't even know what subjects she choose in school.

Lyne could feel her anger, her blood boiling inside her. Her hand still inside her pocket, clasping the gun. 

Was it worth it? Just one gunshot?