The Life Of A Breadstick

Chapter 4

Carb felt his texture was getting a little dry so he decided to take a butter bath.

It really helps to keep ya moisturized in the winter.

He was doing some deep thinking, contemplating his entire pathetic life, while soaking in the pool of liquid cholesterol.

Carb thought about their band practice from the other night, cringing at the memory of Kitty eating his relatives.

Overall, he loved making music with the boys.

What a story that would be, explaining how they all met.

Carb met Kiwi by tutoring sessions. Then, Carb and Kiwi met Kerchief by stalking him outside his basement window, resulting in them getting caught. Kerchief met Kitty at a 'My Little Pony' convention. Who knew.

Carb's thoughts were interrupted by his mother, banging on the door.

"CARB HURRY UP. YOU NEED TO GET YOUR WISDOM TEETH OUT TODAY!"

Uhm. Wut.

"MOM YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. THATS THE ONLY WISDOM I HAVE. I DONT NEED SOME DOCTOR SLICING ME OPEN FOR A COUPLE OF TEETH!"

"IM YOUR MOTHER. WHAT I SAY GOES."

Carb got out of the bath tub and draped a towel over his naked body.

He then trudged to his room to get dressed.

After he came out of his room, he went to the kitchen to wait for Liz.

Queen Loaf grabbed her breadmobile keys and led Carb out the door of their bakery.

*At le oral surgeon place*

"Alright Carb, were going to put you on oxygen and give you an IV for medicine." The nurse said while stabbing Carb in the rib.

"OW LADY WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING!?" Carb yelled, thrashing around.

The nurse got scared of Carb's outburst so she quickly put the sleeping medication into his IV and soon enough he was out snoring. She put on an oxygen mask over his face and put two heart monitors on his chest and back.

To be safe, she also put restraints on him in case he gets violent when he awakens.

Later the doctor came in and did his job. He extracted four teeth, aka the rest of Carb's wisdom.

Before it was time for Carb to wake up, the nurse switched the oxygen, that Carb was receiving, over to laughing gas.

Carb's eye lids fluttered open and he immediately started giggling.

He puffed out his cheeks that were already stuffed with gauze and then he asked for more so he could play the chubby bunny challenge.

The nurse felt safe to take off Carb's restraints, seeing that he was now completely harmless. Then she removed his IV.

Carb was escorted to the waiting room where Queen Loaf was waiting.

"The surgery went well. You'll have to change the gauze twice each hour, for another two hours. The laughing gas should wear off in about an hour."

While the nurse was talking, Carb looked up at the ceiling, swaying and continued to giggle obnoxiously.

Liz put her hands on Carbs shoulders to guide him out of the office, without letting him walk into a wall and knock himself out. 

When they got outside Carb stole the keys from his mother's hand and insisted on driving to McDonalds.

"Carb. No. You just got out of surgery. You can't drive for 24 hours."

"Mom it's fine. If we crash, we die. Yolo, whatever. Lets go.", Carb said while smiling.

Liz then yanked the keys back from Carb and got into the drivers seat.

"Get in the breadmobile now.", Queen Loaf demanded.

Carb stood next to the door and started mimicking Liz in a high pitched voice.

"CARB GET IN THE BREADMOBILE OR IM NOT GOING TO LET YOU WATCH CARTOONS TONIGHT!"

So Carb rolled his eyes and groaned as he got into the passenger seat.

They drove home and Carb was still upset he never got to go to McDonalds.

"Ok Carb. I have to change the gauze. Open up.", Liz said in a sweet voice.

"Who are you tellin me to open up? Open what up? My legs? Is that what you want?", Carb said confused, clearly still drugged.

"No Carb. Open your mouth.", Liz said, holding up the gauze.

Carb open his mouth wide and said "Ahhhh" while Liz pulled out the bloody cotton sheet.

When Carb saw all the blood, he started to cry.

"Mom. Mom Im bleeding! Im going to die. Im too young to die!", Carb whimpered.

"Well apparently you were fine with that an hour ago when you wanted to drive", Liz muttered under her breath.

"Honey, you're fine. Now let me put this in your mouth, so you won't die.", She said in her sweet voice.

That convinced Carb to believe her so he opened his mouth once again, with tears still streaming down his cheeks.

"Promise I wont die Mommy?"

"Yes dear. I promise you wont die." Liz smiled.

~

Ok I don't know if y'all find this funny or not, but I tried. Anyway Thank you for reading ☕️
Qotc: Who's your favorite character?