heart strings

chapter 6

hi guys! this is a bit of a filler chapter, so it might be a little long. enjoy!- alyson

Jack's POV

I was sitting in the recording room, setting up for a reading your comments video. 

Mark had taken Trina to tour her new school, I couldn't go I had to catch up on work.

I glanced at the questions I picked randomly. This is going to be a pretty funny video, I thought. 

As I was scanning the questions I came across the most frequently asked one. 

"What exactly happened in your past?" 

I sighed. 

It was time. I had to tell them, I couldn't put it off any longer.

I turned on the camera. 

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I finally reached the dreaded question.

"So Jack, what happened in your past? You get asked this a lot and I'm hoping you will really answer it this time." I read.

I took a deep breath. 

"It's time you guys got a straight answer. I have been hinding it from you guys for too long and you all deserve to know." 

"It all started a little over 12 years ago..."

Flashback

I was about 17 at the time. My life wasn't the best thing in the world. 

My dad abused my mom and my sisters. Both of my brothers left home as soon as they could, and I still haven't heard from any of them.

My mom was my best friend. She was always there for me, even when she was in pain. 

I didn't really have any friends because I wasn't exactly the most pleasant person ever. I was always mad at the world for it letting my mom suffer. 

I always threw myself in front of my dad's wrath to protect my mom. 

One day, I went out with this kid, his name was Patrick I believe, to a party.

I wouldn't normally go to parties, but my mom encouraged it, saying I should socialize a bit more. 

So of course I went to please my mom. My dad wasn't home, so she would be safe.

I never should have. 

I came home, after having a bit of fun, to see my mom dead on the floor in our living room. 

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Apparently my dad came home, raging drunk, and got mad at my mom and punched her, right into her cabinet full of her favorite china dishes. 

She got crushed by the cabinet falling on her and pieces of broken plates got stuck in her head. 

He killed her. My mom. The only person who could make me smile and make me forget about all the troubles at home.

I saw this, and ran. I ran and ran and ran. As fast as I could, anyway to get away. 

I eventually realized that I had left my mom, when she most needed me. I hated myself for that and I'm still not sure that I have forgiven myself yet.

I was young and upset, so I turned to something to ease the pain. Drugs. 

It got so bad that I OD over 16 times. 

I eventually figured out that I needed help, so I went to rehab. Once I got out of rehab, I began to do YouTube.

Rehab didn't help at all. 

I relapsed.

It wasn't as bad as last time, but drugs are bad, non the less.

The person who fixed me up, was Mark. 

We were about a month or so into dating when he found out about my addiction.

We almost broke up. 

I told him I wanted to get better, so he stayed. 

For several months we fought over me going to rehab.

It really strained our relationship, but eventually I went and got better.

Without Mark, I would be dead right now.

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"...And that's the whole story. I feel like absolute shit for not telling you guys for so long..."

I trailed off.

"I hope you can forgive me."