Jack's POV
Imagine someone stabbing you, ripping your limbs, torturing you in the ways you despise the most. They burn you, drown you, beat on you, shoot you and rip your heart out of your chest and crush it to tiny pieces.
But none of this kills you, you're alive the entire time.
You have to suffer through this never ending excruciating pain.
You want to scream, to shred your throat and collapse your lungs.
You want to scream at the top of your fucking lungs until not a single noise can come out of you. But you can't. Maybe it's the fact that your daughters asleep that keeps you from screaming.
You want to cry, to drown yourself in tears. To cry and cry until there nothing but your tears for endless miles.
But you can't. The faucet to your eyes isn't just turned off, it's broken. Smashed and crunched.
You want to tear down the walls and hurl things around.
You want to completely fucking obliterate everything you see. You want to break things. You want to hurt. But you can't. You're too numb to even blink.
You want to end the numb feeling.
You want to end the desire to scream and cry. You want to forget all about this. Drug yourself up, and it would all melt away. It would be so easy, just to take something, anything to stop this torture. You could take the easy way out and do drugs and never bat an eye.
You could go back to the scum life you were living, a druggie out on the streets. Anything would fucking be better than this.
Heck, you could even take too much. Swallow a couple extra pills, add some more heroine. Death sounded blissful at this point.
What would it matter?
Eventually you'd be alone in this world anyway.
But you have to rationalize with yourself.
Your fans? Your job?
Pretty sure they'd be fine. My job would be empty without him.
Your family?
What family?
Your daughter?
She'd be fine with another family. She shouldn't be around me anyway. I'm an awful influence.
Are you sure?
I'm not sure about anything anymore.
Trina. She needs you. She'll need you more than anything soon enough. When she finds out. You can't kill yourself, and you can't relapse. Not now and not ever.
Mark will need you too you know. He's going to have a shit storm coming.
You'll have to support them Sean.
I know,
but a world without Mark, my soul mate, my counter part, the person who saved me, isn't a world worth living in.
But I have to be strong.
For Mark.
He needs me and I crushed him.
Fucking hell.
YOU ARE READING
heart strings
Fanfictionseptiplier happens. they fall in love and we all knew it would happen eventually. but what happens when they want to settle down and try to start a life together? will the hardships be too much and they split? or will something else happen? or wil...
