Wrong Number (Cake Hoodings)

31

{ t h i r t y o n e }

Calum: my friend told me a blonde joke today

Calum: I thought they died out in 2014.

Luke: what was it?

Calum: how can you tell when a blonde is having a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.

Luke: wow, I'm so offended.

Calum: you're blonde?

Luke: the blondest, I'm the stereotype too because I'm kinda dumb so

Calum: you don't sound at all dumb. If anything you are the smarter one of the 2 of us.

Luke: I'm failing all of my classes but music.

Calum: remember when you said everyone falls into a category? School just isn't yours. Doesn't mean you're dumb.

Luke: how dare you use my own words against me, but thank you

Calum: okay so I've got a question that's not at all small talk for you.

Luke: go on

Calum: what's something you're insecure about?

Luke: oh

Luke: um, I have some acne scars on my face that I really hate. What about you?

Calum: my ass is really feminine.

Luke: ...really?

Calum: yeah -.-

Luke: ...could you send me a picture so I know how feminine we're talking here?

Calum: I think I've created a fuckboy

Calum: I mean I should've seen this coming who can resist me?

Luke: everyone u virgin

Calum: rude.

Calum: I'll have you know that I kissed a girl when I was 10 and she held my hand and everything

Calum: it was so romantic

Calum: who took your virginity then fuckboy?

Luke: why do you assume somebody took my innocence

Calum: you called me a virgin

Luke: I didn't not call myself a virgin though.

Calum: now you're just confusing me.

Luke: I've not even kissed another person okay so shut up.

Calum: if it helps the kiss when I was 10 was not all the fun I made it out to be.

Luke: how so? :")

Calum: she got dared to do it and just shoved her tongue down my throat while I was trying to eat my snickers bar. I almost choked- and not in the good way

Luke: Calum Hood- death by choking on girls tongue.

Luke: sounds just as romantic as you described it

Luke: at least she held your hand.

Luke: how will anyone else ever live up to those expectations she created??

Calum: I mean you could try I'm not sure if you'll succeed but feel free to give it a go.