"Let me cryyy, they say a man ain't supposed to cryy. So Ima let this song cry." My eyes fluttered open as I heard August singing next to me.
I grabbed my phone and looked at the time and it was 1:30 in the morning. He's been doing this a lot lately, he wakes up in the middle of the night in night sweats, or I'll hear him up just singing with so much pain in his voice.
"What's wrong baby?" I asked laying my head back down on my pillow.
"Nothin ma, what you doing up?" He asked and I turned over looking up at him sitting up against the headboard.
"Well see I was sleep, but you was singing a little loud. You on snapchat?" I asked looking at him hold his phone like he had been recording himself
"Yea and my bad bae, I'll try to keep it down." He apologized and I shook my head
"It's ok Ant, can't sleep?"
"Nah not really." He answered looking at his phone
"Thinking too much?" I asked him knowing what was wrong
"Like always" he sighed
"Baby I know this stuff with your family is bothering you, but you can't let it suck the life from you, don't allow yourself to lose sleep over it. ALL families have their times of problems, but I promise this will all past and God will bring you peace of mind." I laid on my stomach with my arms under my face as he rubbed through my hair.
"I hear you, it's just hard not having that support from the people who claim they love me the most. You know I want that genuine, good relationship with my moms like you have with yours but she just doesn't seem to appreciate my efforts baybeh."
He looked at me with so much hurt in his eyes and it broke my heart. A son longs for his mother's love and deep down I know that little boy that still lives in Aug and he's hurting wishing his mother would just love him for him and not what he can do for her now.
"I know what it looks like but me and my mama ain't always had this great relationship Ant. For the longest time we couldn't get along for nothing, we was always arguing about something, it seemed like nothing I did was ever good enough and lived up to her expectations.
We tried counseling and everything, but eventually I just stopped fighting to try and make her the mother I wanted but the mother I needed.
The one who always pushed me to do my best cuz she always knew my potential. I realized she's been a certain way her entire life and she ain't gone change for nobody but herself now so I love her whether we agree or disagree.
She my mama and I only get one and I know I'll miss her when she's gone so I cherish her while she's with me. I promise things will get better you just need to sit down and truly have a heart to heart and make her understand what you're feeling." I explained and he just nodded
"August!" I raised my voice cause he's so damn stubborn
"I hear you ma I promise I do, but there's just no sense in trying to fix things with her cause she ain't gone ever change" He ran his and down his face and I sighed
"You don't know that, you have to spark that nerve in her to make her see that her son needs her and she has to make some changes to make things right. Just try for me babe alright, and if nothing changes you can at least say you tried okay" I asked him and he sighed
"I'll try ma, I really will" He said and I nodded
"Thank you now go to sleep Anthony, my family will be here tomorrow for thanksgiving. And we got a lot to do" I laid my head back down on my pillow with my head facing Aug.
YOU ARE READING
In Love With The Preacher's Daughter
FanfictionBeing the granddaughter of one of the biggest preachers in the country has it's pros and cons. Koko Ray was always known as the pretty chocolate preacher's daughter and granddaughter with the a voice out of this world. She was also always called pre...
