Last First Kiss {A One Direction Fanfic}

Chapter 24 - Little Things Sometimes Makes You Cry

Chapter 24 – Little Things Sometimes Makes You Cry

*Cassidy’s P.O.V.*

Today is the day. The day that, after almost 5 months, I get to see him. I get to see them. I’m nervous and excited and happy and sad and I don’t even know what else. It has been the craziest 5 months. I had moved on from Harry. I had to. I tried dating other guys, trying to meet someone. I wanted to take my mind off of him. I wanted to meet someone, fall in love, more in love than what I was with Harry, so that when I saw him again I wouldn’t feel anything. We could all just be friends. I was trying to tell myself I was ok with that. But in the end, all the guys I dated, I compared them to Harry. ‘His face is too masculine’, ‘his face isn’t masculine enough’, ‘his clothes are too hipster’, ‘his clothes aren’t hipster enough’, ‘he isn’t as kind and caring as Harry’, ‘he smothers me too much’. It was driving me, and all the guys I dated, crazy. I never lasted longer than 2 weeks in a relationship with someone.

My friends and family knew what I was doing, trying to avoid any sort of conversation that involved him or made me think of him. In the end I would just stop asking Dad how work was, because it all became too painful, and reminded me of the boy I was and still am in love with.

For a good 3 months I convinced myself that I didn’t need him. That I didn’t love him. That me and him could never be, it would never work out and I would end up heartbroken. That dating an international popstar was stupid and unfair on me. I thought I had completely convinced myself and rid the thought of being with Harry. I was almost beginning to believe that I would be able to call him and tell him that although we can’t be together we can still be friend’s, and that I would love to catch up with him and the lads when they returned from tour.

That was, until I heard it. Until I heard their song. Until Little Things came on the T.V. and I saw their faces. Until I saw Harry staring into the T.V. screen and into my eyes. I couldn’t take it. My eyes started to well up with tears as the song continued to play. they ran down my cheeks and all I could do was cry. No sound came out of my mouth, just tears falling silently from my eyes. Mum heard the song on the T.V. and came in, I knew she was running in to change the channel before I heard it, she knew this song was my weakness. When she came in, she saw me, curled up on the couch, crying and staring at the boys. She pulled me into her embrace and gently rocked me back and forth as silent tears continued to escape my once dried eyes.

“I need him, Mum. I thought I didn’t, but I do. I have to be with him. I can’t fight this anymore. I need to call him.” I sobbed into her shirt as she stroked my back.

“I know you do sweety, we all do, you were the only one who didn’t see that.” She whispered to me. I knew she was right. I looked up at her and whipped my eyes.

“I have to call him, now!” I began to stand up but Mum pulled me back down to her.

“He just started his European tour Cas, you can’t call him now. You can’t leave school to go and be with him and he can’t leave the tour. If you call him, all he will want to do is return to you, he won’t perform to his best and he may even just run to you. I know you want that, but he needs to do his job.”

“When does his tour end Mum?” I knew she would know, hell she knew everywhere he would be for the next year because she knew that one day, I would come around.

“The boys have a show in Madrid on the 25th of May, call him that night and talk to him then.” She kissed me softly on my forehead as I nodded slowly. I knew she was right, I knew I had to wait, I just don’t know how I will last the next 2 months.

So here we are, the day I am going to call him. Its 11pm here in London which means it’s 12am in Madrid. I fished out my phone and scrolled down to Harry’s number and hovered my finger over it. I was nervous. We haven’t spoken to each other in 6 months, since he said he would give me space. I was going over the ‘what if’s’ in my head. I took a deep breath and pressed his number. I put the phone to my ear and waited for him to answer.