The Wolf and the Halla

Kiss and Tell

She had been caught up in his excitement, in his happy gait and the way he had smiled. Listening to that beautiful voice, she had almost not heard what he had been saying. She tried to focus.
"..you sealed it with a gesture." His hand held up, imitating when she had closed the breach. "In that moment. I felt the world change." His hand dropped to his side as he looked back to her.

Her heart leaped, "Felt the world change?" She stepped a bit closer.

"You change everything." He said sweetly.

She flushed and stepped closer still. "Sweet talker."

....

She couldn't believe that he had actually kissed her. Sure, it happened in the Fade, but he still kissed her! She was absolutely exhilarated by the simple thought of how his soft lips had pressed to hers. Then he had said "We shouldn't. It is not right." But then he had smiled and kissed her again.

She had just awoken in her quarters. Unsure of how she had gotten there, but she didn't care about that too much. She rushed from her bed and ran down the stairs. Once she entered the main hall she tried to walk normally. She turned into Solas' quarters.

"Hey." She said happily. He turned to her and smiled. "That was.. Interesting."

He chuckled. "Sleep well?"

"That was..." she trailed.

"My apologies. It has always been.. Easier to show emotion in the Fade." He replied.

"Hmm, didn't seem like you were sorry when your tongue was in my mouth." She stated with a smile.

"I did no such thing." He said. But mostly playfully.

"Oh, what? Does it not count of its Fade tongue?" She laughed. He smiled back at her. "I really like you." She said.

"I like you too, Adani." He said. "I am not sure it is in your best interest to be with me though." He said sadly.

"I don't care. I want to be." She said.

"I.. Please, give me some time to think." He said.

"Okay." She said. She was tired of waiting on him to come around. These games were getting old, but she couldn't shake him off of her, it seemed.
....

Later she had to meet up with Cassandra. They had been talking some time when Cassandra asked her how she had felt about being named Inquisitor and how it had affected her.

"I had expected it, on some level. I guess. But it has had an impact. I have responsibilities. People consider me a part of the Chantry.. I have to make decisions. Hard decisions." She paused. Cassandra was ever so patiently listening and now she looked up as if to assure Adani she was still listening. She continued. "I heard of my Clan almost attacking when Josephine sent word. Why would they do that? They are always so peaceful. We never just attacked people. What happened?" She looked and felt confused now. "Was it Lyklor", she said under her breath.

Cassandra looked perplexed. "Perhaps they thought the agent had ill intent?"

"No." Adani said. "No, they wouldn't just attack. The Keeper doesn't believe in violence. And neither do any of us. Not unless its necessary."

"Well then, perhaps.."

Adani cut her off "It doesn't matter. They're all alive and that's what matters." She looked at Cassandra's confused face and decided to change the subject. "What about your duties? Have they changed any?"

The next hour she made sure they were talking about Cassandra or strictly the Inquisition. She did not want to think about any of that other stuff. Until eventually she had to tell her.

"Solas and I kissed today. Well, kind of. I mean it was in the Fade but.." She said.

"You what?! Oh, I knew you two were up to no good!" Cassandra had exclaimed. "In the Fade?"

"Yes." Adani explained, "We went to Haven. In the Fade I mean. And we were talking and flirting and all as usual and then I just really wanted to kiss him. So I did. And then I thought I had messed up, but he grabbed me and pulled me back into him and kissed me. It was amazing."

Cassandra smiled. "Well, I am glad that you have found someone."

"He held my hand on the way here." She said. "I wasn't sure if it had meant anything. I'm still not sure that it does"
.......

The evening went well actually. They had drinks. Not the stout kind that Bull would have them drink. They laughed. They just enjoyed the company of a friend. Adani thought about how amazing it all was. She and Cassandra were two totally different people. They came from different cultures and had different beliefs. They were different races and classes. Cassandra was strong and humble. Adani was prideful and relied more on magic. They were so different, and yet here they were, friends. Friends in the middle of a war.

Is that why she had wanted Solas' attention so much? Because they were in the middle of a war and she thought she needed more. She needed attention. She needed... What? Love? Or merely affection? She searched her heart for the answer to this need, and found nothing.

Later she lay in bed, deep in thoughts that kept inevitably going in circles. All wound up like a ball of rubber bands. She came to the conclusion that she just wanted him. She wanted him closer to her heart and her skin. She wanted to know him better. She wanted to let herself be taken away with this thing they had. She wanted.. Him to love her too?

Is that what this is? Love? Do I love him?
She searched hard and deep for the answer to that question. However, she did not find it before sleep came.