Odell Quickies

I Just Wanted Gingerbread Cookies Man

It was holiday time on LSU's campus. I would have tried going home after finals but I couldn't because of some big football game we had coming up. Now I'm big on Christmas, it's my favorite time of year so naturally I was trying to give myself some Christmas cheer and include my teammates/roommates in on it too.

"Bro what the fuck is that?" Brad stood next to Jarvis in the kitchen of our apartment.

"It's gingerbread ass!" Jarvis snickered aloud. "Amazing isn't it?" He painted a red thong on one with frosting.

"Bruh." I start with my head titled back and eyes dropped low in disgust. "We making gingerbread men not-," I looked at Jarvis' tray with wide eyes, "IS THAT A DICK MAN?"

"Haha, yeah." Him and Brad doubled over in laughter. "Can't have the ass and no dick."

"Man, you the only one eating those cookies dog." I heard my phone ring in my room. "Man watch my shit Brad, keep this nigga away from my tray." I sprinted to the room just before the phone stopped ringing. I looked at the notification that my mom had called and immediately called back. "Hey mama, what's up?" I was a little winded.

"Nothing, are you okay?" I told her I was fine and explained I was just out of breath from trying to catch my phone. "Oh okay, how's everything? You coming home soon?" She sounded a little sad cause she was used to me being with her every year around this time. For the longest it was just me and my mama before she got married and had my little sister. So I understood it really.

"I hope so. This game is big and coach says he wants us focused and if we came home for a bit it would just throw us off, after though I'll definitely be coming home. Promise ma." I smiled at the thought of being home with home cooked meals and don't get me wrong, I loved my boys but I needed a break sometimes to get my mind right again.

"So what you doing baby?" She asked, I could tell she'd cheered up a little.

"Making gingerbread men with Juice and Aussie." My mom let out a howl before telling me it was gonna be a disaster, not solely cause Jarvis is a huge clown but because none of us could boil water even if our life depended on it. "Ma, I can bake some gingerbread cookies, oh my god."

"If you say so. Call me later baby. Love you." I gave her a kiss through the phone.

I can't even lie, I'm a mama's boy for real but I couldn't help but be one. She's sacrificed so much for me at such a young age. I slipped my phone into the pocket of my purple and yellow gym shorts. It had gotten too quiet in that kitchen I was a little suspicious.

I slunk back into the kitchen silently. "What y'all up to?"

They both jumped almost clean out their skin. "Noth-nothing man." Jarvis couldn't even talk through his giggles.

"What did you do?" My eyes were squinted at the side of his face. "Brad what he do?"

Brad doubled over laughing. "Just-just look man." He stepped to the side and opened the oven.

"YALL TURNED ALL MY COOKIES INTO DICKS?!" My voice boomed angrily. "Man y'all play too much, damn!" I grabbed a pair of oven mitts and took the cookies out the oven, even madder they were damn near done. "Brad I told you keep him away from my shit bruh."

"I did, but I thought it'd be funnier to let him." His face was red as tears streaked down his cheeks. Jarvis was on the floor rolling around holding his gut.

"Shit. I can't-I can't breathe man!" He was slapping on his thigh trying to stand back up. "Ya face man!" He looked at me for a second and broke into laughter all over again.

"Man fuck y'all. I just wanted goddamn gingerbread men." I pouted and walked over to the couch pulling out my phone. "Y'all get on my nerves."

While sitting and sulking my phone buzzed in my pocket. I looked at the screen: v.royalty.s tagged you in a photo. I swiped the notification to see a photo of my tray of dick cookies with the caption: @obj_3  got the ass and dicks on lock 😂😂😂😂😂😂

"TAKE IT DOWN!" Brad and Jarvis erupted into more booming laughter.