written in scars || father lrh (au)

chåpter twø

I never got Leilani's answer. She ran off upstairs. I wasn't up to interrogating her - I didn't feel the need, either. After a while, I ventured upstairs myself. As I approached her door, I heard soft sobbing. I was going to ignore it. But then I remembered - that's my daughter.

I slowly pushed the door open, quietly stepping over to her bedside. She was asleep, but her facial expression was that of pain and terror. She was sweating, and trembling, and turning. Suddenly, she whimpered, stopping. In an instant, she had screamed into consciousness, sitting up abruptly, breathing hard and fast.

"Kid, calm down?" My statement came as more of a question. I had no idea how to look after a kid. I didn't even remember how to be one.
I was abandoned at a young age and put into the care system. It was cruel. I watched all the other kids leave, and I was so happy when I finally got out. But I suddenly wished I'd gotten to stay at that place. Let's just stay that my adopted mother did... Unpleasant things. And that's why I'm here, with Leilani, and her with me; I don't want that for her.

I didn't realise I was sat on the edge of Leilani's bed until I had zoned back out and began to hum. I recognised my humming to be '(Welcome To) The Black Parade'. Leilani crawled over to me, sobbing into my chest as she hugged it tightly. I tensed slightly, unsure of what to do. Do I push her away? Do I stroke her hair? What the hell are my boundaries?!

I awkwardly hugged her back, still humming. After I finished the song, I patted her back gently, realising her sobbing to have stopped. "Nightmares, kid?"
She nodded, fists clenching my shirt.

"It's okay. You're safe here."
She looked up at me, sniffling.

"What do I call you, Mister?"

I thought about it.
"Well, I'm Luke. Luke Robert Hemmings. However, my nicknames tend to range," I thought back to the prison guards' names for me, "So I guess you can call me what you like."
I shrugged, letting her go. She wiped her face and crawled back beneath the covers. Even in the darkness, her eyes of intense blue shone, clashing with mine. I nodded awkwardly. As she snuggled down against the soft material of her pillow, I headed for the door.

"Hey, Luke?" Her fragile voice called as I stopped in the light of the doorway. I turned my head enough for my eyes to wonder back to her, muttering, "Yeah?"

She bit her lip. "Are you my dad?"

I sighed. "Never feel pressured to give someone a title. Yes, I'm your father my blood, but whether I'm your dad? You get to decide whether that's my name."

She nodded slowly and reluctantly. "Goodnight, Luke."
I didn't reply, but I could've sworn I heard her whisper, "Thankyou, dad." as I proceeded down the corridor.