What You Don't See

A List

I took a deep breath and steadied myself once I climbed out of Jake's truck. I pulled at the hem of my short mint green shorts, feeling incredibly uncomfortable. They were ripped and had gold studs lining the seem of the left pocket. The knitted loose crop top, that's sleeves rested just above my shoulders, showed way too much midriff for my liking. The long gold necklace was scratching at the back of my neck and the gold leaf ring around my index finger was annoying the hell out of me. I never wear jewelry and I know why.

I felt weird and although I never give two shits what people think about me, I couldn't help but feel like everyone knew how fake this whole new look was.

I flipped a strand of hair over my shoulder. It was perfectly parted on the left side with my bangs loosely braided and pinned to the right. Natalie spent extra time curling my light brown hair into soft messy waves.

I lifted the back of my hand to my lips trying to remove the thick sticky lip gloss pasted on them. The heated air was causing a thin layer of sweat above my eyebrows but I was sternly instructed to not wipe the foundation layering my face. Although there wasn't much, the powder caused my face to look much more tan. The coat of mascara on my lashes reached all the way to my upper eyelids that were lightly smeared with a gold eyeshadow.

I cautiously approached a group of guys on the team with Jake by my side. They turned their heads and let their eyes roam to my body and linger mostly at my legs.

"Hey guys." I waved at them, making sure to avoid eye contact.

"Tanner?" One of the guys asked in disbelief.

My eyes roamed over the crowd of eyes and met with Michael, our team's goalie. His eyebrows were raised slightly as he looked over me again.

"Yeah dumb ass. Who else would it be?" I shot him a disgusted glare, not being able to hold my anger at bay any longer.

Why is everybody looking at me like that? So what I'm wearing different clothes! I waited patiently for someone to say something but they all just stared at me like I had a third eye.

"What?" I demanded at them, raising my voice slightly.

It must have been louder than I thought because the moment I said it, they all winced at the sound.

"Don't hit me for saying this but..." Michael trailed off and looked around behind me. He cleared his throat and returned our gaze. "Since when do you wear girl clothes?"

I raised my eyebrow slightly in confusion. Why is it so hard for them to realize that I'm actually a girl. Just because I'm violent, wear baggy clothes, and cuss a lot doesn't mean I'm not a girl.

Oh god, none of them see me as a girl. Do I really act so much like a guy? Being around my older brothers my whole life, I never really noticed how manly I can be.

"Well in case you didn't know, I'm actually a girl." I spat back sarcastically. I'm so done with having to explain that to everyone.

"Yeah but you're not...you're not really like..." Michael nervously chuckled taking a step back.

"I'm not going to hit you Michael!" I shrieked at him. "Shit you guys, why is it so hard to believe?" I turned slightly and pushed through them.

Shoving open the door to my first period, I glanced at the clock and noticed I was early. I tossed my navy blue backpack onto my desk and slumped into my regular seat. I heard a muffled buzzing from the front pocket of my backpack and unzipped it.

"Hey Nat." I answered.

"How's your morning going?" Her voiced echoed around her and I imagined her being in a bathroom of some sort.