Dear Dad

March 27th

March 27th,

            It had been a few months since Christmas Eve and Anabella still seemed depressed.  I don’t blame her though.  I knew her pain now.  I knew how much it hurt.

            We were in the hallway in between classes when I noticed something about Anabella that was different.  “Have you lost weight?”  I asked noticing that she looked skinnier.  She shook her head no.  Her eyebrows were raised, she was lying.  I tilted my head and raised my eyebrows giving her the “tell me the truth” look.  She sighed and shook her head yes.  “You don’t need to lose weight though, you’re so thin!”  She started to cry.  She had been doing a lot of crying lately.  I held her and rubber her shoulder like I had done so many times before to try and comfort her.  She pulled away and signed, ‘I have a confession to make.’

“Beautiful, what’s wrong?”

‘I haven’t been eating, like at all.’

“What?  But, why?"

‘Because I look in the mirror and I used to only see my scars.  They kept reminding me of everything, of my dad, of that night, of all the nights before, of my mom and what she went through.  They were there constantly reminding me.  I needed something else in the mirror to focus on.  I started focusing on my body.  Now all I see when I look in the mirror is my stomach and my arms and my thighs.  I see them and I think, look how fat I am.  My dad was right, I am fat and ugly.’

“Don’t you ever say that again!  You’re not fat, you’re so, so skinny.  You’re not ugly, you’re the most beautiful girl who I have ever met.  How about this, next time you look in the mirror don’t look at you flat stomach or your skinny thighs, look at you gorgeous hair and your beautiful eyes.  Look at each and every adorable little freckle on your face.  Look at your cute little nose and your perfect lips. Look at them then look at you, not your body, you.  Look at your personality, look at your quirks.  Look in that mirror and see the girl who to me is flawless, look at the girl who’s perfection to me, look at that girl and know right then that I love every piece of her no matter how she looks.”  She smiled at me.  She wrapped her arms around my neck and mouthed “I love you.”  I looked down at her perfection and said, “I love you to the edge of time and back.”  I kissed her.  After that she started eating again.