Why did I ever let you slip away

"Justin, come back" I laughed as we run around the house. "Justin, we're going to be late." I laughed as I tried to get my 5 year old brother. It was his first day of school today and to say he was excited was an understatement. I am 12 years old and well I really hated school already.
"There's nothing good about school" I said as we walked out the door to catch the bus. He just laughed. Oh he won’t be laughing for long I thought as we got onto the bus.

He sat next to his best friend Troy as I sat next to my friend Gemma. "Jaz, can I please have your cake?" he asked already knowing the answer. "Ah, no" I laughed as I ruffled his hair. He put his hands in a heart formation and put the heart over his heart. I mouthed I love you too.

It had been a couple of days and we were coming home from school when mum came past us in her car. "Do you ever look at your phone Jaz?” she laughed. I looked at my phone as I realized I had 5 missed calls from mum. "Woops" I laughed as Justin and I jumped into the car,

"I built a big Lego house today and then we painted it was so much fun." Justin yelled as he tried to tell us everything that happened at school, oh how I wanted to go back to being 5. "Oh yea that must have been fun." I said as he had to take a breath.

"Yea, yea and then, and then, we were reading.  I read this story about a dog and a boy." I laughed as my brother talked nonstop for the next two minutes.

“Justin, you have to go to bed now” I said as I picked Justin up as he ran out of bed again. “But I don’t wanna” he said as he threw his blanket off his bed. He started jumping on his bed. “Justin you have school tomorrow and it is 9 O’clock.” I said as I picked up his blanket and placed them back on his bed.

He put his hands in a heart formation and put the heart over his heart and I whispered in his ear “I love you too”

It had taken me ten minutes longer to get him asleep admittedly I did bribe him but I still got him asleep, I walked back to my room that was down the hall way and climbed into bed and fell asleep as I fit the pillow.

“Justin” I said as we got off the bus after school. “Yea” He sweetly said as he came over to me. “Dads going to be back today” I say. I watch as he put his hands in a heart formation and put the heart over his heart. “I love you too” I replied as we ran home as fast as we could.

3 months later

Justin and I walked inside after going out for dinner with our nana and granddad when he realized he never said goodbye to them, he ran onto the road.

"Justin, stop!" I yell as my brother ran onto the road as a car raced around the corner. "Justin!" I yell. But I was too late, the car slammed into his tiny body I saw him crumble to the floor, as I reach him I bend down to his tiny body. “Justin.” He didn’t respond. The driver of the car called for an ambulance. Nana and granddad had ran beside me I couldn’t hear what they were saying I was focused only on Justin.

The ambulance had come and taken my younger brother and me away, the ride to the hospital was all a blur I held my brothers hand the whole ride back.

3 hours later.

I was still replaying the incident over and over again, praying he will be alright, praying that I could tell him I love him. I sat in the waiting room with my mum she hugged me as I cried. Nana and granddad were also there waiting for him to live, waiting for him to die.

A doctor came through the doors of the ER. “Hello I’m Doctor Freeman, I’m so sorry but Justin’s injuries were too extensive .I’m so sorry.”

I could feel tears run down my eyes. My mother wrapped her arms around me not wanting to let go.

Justin's funeral was today, It has been one months but it still feels like it was yesterday. I sat on the ground in my room in a black dress I would only wear today.

My mother walked into my room and took my hand helping me walk towards the car. When we got there I put down a flower, it was a rose, because I love him. I put my hands in a heart formation and put the heart over my heart. As I did this I could hear him say I love you too.

We walked off an hour later; I sat in the back in silence wondering when I will see him again. But I knew he would be waiting for me.

He will be forever in my heart.