"I'm fine." I typed as another tear slid down my face hitting the illuminated screen.
But in reality I was far from "fine" I was broken. No I was shattered. Everything was fine... but it all came back. The depression, the suicidal thoughts, the need to feel something besides pain... cutting thats all I wanted was to feel the pain of the blade, instead of the pain that I felt in my heart 24/7 lately. He wasn't the major reason I was hurt.
I was hurt because all I have ever felt was worthless, never enough, pathetic.
He made me feel special. I felt happy, he made me happy. Even the little things, I'd give anything to be in his arms 1 last time. But I knew I couldn't. There were other girls... ones he probably said the same things to. I promised to never ever let anyone in again, I told myself that I would never go for a player even if I was hopefully in love. But it happened. I realize I'm never enough. Thats when it came back.
YOU ARE READING
Late Night Thoughts
PoetryA series of thoughts, that I cannot mute. Some would have these at night, while I have them all day.
