Saving Max

Chapter 25

I wake up to an empty bed for the third time this week. Caden's alarm is ringing in my ear, and all I really want to do is throw it across the room and go back to sleep, but I know I can't. Unfortunately, I have an English test today on the book that I haven't read yet. I looked at the summery of it on Wikipedia last night and am almost certain that I can at least get a solid C on it, which is good enough for me right now. After all, I'm already in Stanford, so it's not like this test is all too important anyway.

Huffing out a long breath I slam my hand down on the alarm, kicking my feet out of bed. Shuffling out into the living room, I pull on Caden's shirt that is loose over my body, glancing down at the sweat pants on my legs as I walk. Looking up, I see Caden sitting on the couch, a cup of coffee sitting on the table in front of him. Probably not his first cup.

I sit down next to him without a word, leaning my head on his shoulder with a sigh, hooking my arm loosely through his as I do so.

He doesn't say anything as we both watch the black screen of the TV, the house filled with a calm quiet passing between the two of us. It's almost nice, if it weren't for the fact that Caden has probably only gotten an hour of sleep for the past three nights in a row. I know that he's stressed, but what he's doing is unhealthy, and its starting to make me nervous.

"Caden." I murmur, lifting my head up of his shoulder to look at him, my arm still wound through his.

He hums as a response, turning his head ever so slightly toward me to acknowledge my words. Taking his hand in mine, I realize how cold he is and instantly scoot closer, wrapping my arms around his waist. This makes him smile a tiny, lopsided smile as he picks me up, placing me on his lap quickly. I let out small squeal, putting my legs on either side of his, straddling his waist as my hands find their way to his chest.

I trace small designs on his shirt, a silence falling over us again as we both calm down a little, giving us a chance to sober back up. He plays with a tangled strand on my hair, his eyes focused on it instead of looking directly at me, his mind drifting away.

"You're starting to worry me." I whisper, running my fingers through his hair, catching his attention so that his eyes finally meet my own. "You're not sleeping, and you're gradually becoming distant. Even more than usual. It's scaring me Caden. You barely talk anymore."

I stare at him worriedly, my fears consuming me as he doesn't answer, making my heart clench in my chest. I know he's not okay, but he won't tell me what's wrong, besides the obvious. I get that we're going through a hard time right now, but he can't just block everybody out. He's can't distance himself; not now. Not when Max and I need him most.

I want to help him, but the worst part about all of this is that he won't let me. He won't let me in on what's going on, and it's making me feel helpless. I feel like I'm all alone now, trying to fight this battle all by myself. When he doesn't talk to me, it doesn't even feel like we're a team anymore. It feels like we're bound together but trying to move separately in all different directions, none of them on he way to each other. It's frustrating, and it's worrisome. Whenever I look at him he seems so far away, and I don't know if I'll be able to reach him to bring him back this time. It hurts knowing that he won't let me help, that he won't even tell me what's going on. All I want to do is make things better, but it's almost like he doesn't want to get better. Like he's already giving up.

"I'm just tired, babe. I'm okay." Caden mumbles, leaning in to press a quick kiss to my lips, my head turning to the side right before we meet. His lips collide against my cheek instead, and I can feel his frown etched against my skin.

"No you're not, Caden. You're not okay, and I want to know why." I tell him sternly, pushing myself back so I can take his face in my hands, my thumbs running across his cheeks, trying to pry the answers out of him.