Young Justice Oneshots

Dick

"Oh my God, Rob, what is wrong with you?" Wally yelled, entering the kitchen to find Dick reading Great Expectations. "You couldn't pick something a little less... I don't know... Old?"

"It's really good," Dick replied, not bothering to look up. "Pip struggles a lot in his short life, and that's--"

"Not that!" Wally said, exasperated. "This!"

M'gann, the only other team member in the room, turned away from the oven then, just in time to see the contents of Wally's backpack. There was a notebook, two textbooks, a few loose papers, and an old, moldy, mushy, banana.

"Seriously?" Wally continued. "Dick, you're not even gonna look up?"

Dick slammed his book shut and looked over his sunglasses at Wally with wide eyes. "Wally!"

"Oh no, you don't get to place blame on me here, this is all your fault, Dick."

"Did I miss something?" M'gann asked. "Of course I am aware of the context, but that particular word seems a little strong for this prank."

Wally stared at her in disbelief, then burst out laughing. In fact, he was laughing so hard that he almost fell on his face. Dick stood from his stool and walked over to kick Wally lightly. M'gann remained very confused.

"She thought... I can't... Oh God..." Wally stammered through his giggles. Dick smiled a little, but he was still pretty mad at Wally.

"Still though," Wally said, mock sincerity on his face, "Dick move." He burst out laughing again, and M'gann felt that she really did have to ask.

"Why does he keep saying that?"

Dick sighed, kicking Wally in the shin and ignoring his pain in favor of turning back toward M'gann to explain. "He's not using it as a curse word," he said. "It's my name."

"It's... It is your name?" M'gann asked. "But your name is Robin!"

"Dick is his secret identity," Wally added, still grinning. Even that was a half joke.

"Oh!" M'gann said. "I assumed Wally was just very angry about his books."

"Well, that too," Wally said.

"Hey," Dick replied, "in my defense, you once put an apple in my sleeping bag and I didn't find it until three months later when we went camping."

"Yeah," Wally said, flopping down to eat some of M'gann's freshly baked cake, "but in my defense, that was hilarious."