I Hate You, I Love You { mitch grassi }

III

"Hi, I'm Mitch."

I tense up and turn around to be met with a face I never wanted to see again. Izzy takes my hand and squeezes it, calming my nerves a bit.

"Nervous?" He laughs lightly.

I shake my head, unable to find words that aren't rude, offensive, or anything that won't get me kicked out. I notice Scott from across the room and signal to him for him to get Mitch away. I clearly wasn't ready for this. I've spent two days trying to prepare but I can't. I want to cry and scream and honestly just punch a tree.

Immediately after Mitch leaves, they all gather to sing a song. Scott picks Natural Disaster based on what had happened earlier and they all begin. It was a beautiful performance and I had to restrain myself from singing the entire time. It's my absolute favorite song of theirs. The entire time I would notice Mitch looking at me with a confused face, but I just figured he was thinking of something disgusting to say.

After the small performance, everyone claps and it goes back to a regular meet and greet.

Scott comes up to me and laughs at my shirt. He pulls me away from everyone and starts talking to me.

"You don't have to talk if you don't want to. You don't have to do anything. But it really looks like Mitch wants to talk to you." He whispers.

I let out a deep sigh and look at Scott.

"I just.." I stop. I can't put any words together to describe how I feel. I thought I would just be furious but im not. I'm angry and sad and fluster and confused and I can barely look at him. "It's been so long. And he's never nice, he's always so rude to me. He only ever insulted me our entire highschool years. Then when I moved at the end of junior year he literally told me no the only thing that people will miss about me is the radiating whore off of me. I honestly just want to cry."

"It's okay, Cress. Just don't rush it, okay?" He hugged me tightly and took my hand and we rejoined the group. I talked to Avi, and was introduced to Kirstie and Kevin by Scott. But soon all I could think about was Mitch.

Why did he hate me so much? What did I ever actually do to him?

It made me so mad to the point I actually started yelling at him in my head.

"I did nothing to you, Mitchell Grassi. I didn't do an absolute thing. I was the best person I could've been to you and you only ever repaid me by being a total jerk! You abandoned me and everything we ever had. We were best friends. It was supposed to be us against the world, until you became the world and turned against me. I just want an explanation, Mitch. Why do you hate me? Did you miss me? Why did you leave? I missed you so much. We w-" I was cut off by a voice behind me.

"We were best friends. But, I left, and I was so mean, and I didn't mean to be. But I missed her so much. And I cared about her so much. And I'm just really sorry." He said.

I turned around to see Mitch standing there, looking me dead in the eyes. I looked around for Scott, but he was no where to be seen.

"Cressida, I-"

"Please stop, Mitch."

"But I need to say something." He said persistently. I did my best to choke back tears.

"You had three years to say something. Something other than 'Maybe you would look cute if you didn't shop at Moms R Us.' or 'Wow, Cressida, you look exceptionally fat today!' You had three years. But all you did was become a plastic monster. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go find Scott. And I suggest telling everyone else here who you really are. Because one day, they'll all think you really care about them but then you'll just walk off stage and never come back. And you'll meet explain why you didn't show up to their birthday party or to their theater performances until one day they see you with another band while you're talking shit about them. Because that the type of thing you love to do. The type of thing I had to get used to for. Three. Years," I turn to walk over to Kirstie, who didn't seem to notice the commotion, "Bye, Mitch."

***

Soon after, the concert started. I sat I misery and in complete though of what had just happened while I keep catching hopeful looks from Scott.

Scott is a great person. I mean I've only known him for two days, and he is a world famous superstar, but I feel like we could end up being great friends. Avi, too. They're really great people. It makes me wonder what Mitch did to them for them to like him so much.

The concert went on and I actually started enjoying myself. They were really good. It's surprising I like them because I actually hate everything and everyone.

They started singing Love Again, and I couldn't help but scream-sing along.

Maybe I'll actually enjoy myself the rest of the night.