Snippets of Life

S A D N E S S

S A D N E S S

No but seriously

I should be happy
Not sad
Cause they tell me "girl you're only a teen, you shouldn't be upset."
And they tell me "not everyone wants to save the world."
But I do.

I do.

The fragility of the world is getting to me
It's not the place I thought it was
When I played with Barbies and imagined things
Now they're meaner
Angrier
Sadder
More insecure

I'm 6 when I realize
People don't like themselves
And they don't like it
When they see what they want in you
So they put it on you
And tell themselves that it's better
To make
Someone else feel bad

I'm 12 when I realize
You can fail
Without actually failing
You can fail
Expectations
Standards
People
Friends
Teachers
Parents

I'm 14 when I realize
That there's a place in my mind
That's too dark
That I can get lost in
That I can fall and fall and fall
And never come up
That it is possible
To be so numb
You forget
What physical pain feels like
That it is possible
To wish
Your entire existence away

I'm 15 when I realize
What it's like to be so afraid
Your breath is gone
When you're so scared
And so stressed
Your heart
Might
Just
Beat out your ribcage
And there is no one
Absolutely no one
To hug you and say it's okay.
And I realized
What it was like to be victim
To a restless mind
What it was like
During all those endless nights

I'm 16 when I realize
That
There are too many problems in the world
That my mind is an enemy
That there is a black hole
That's just grown and grown
And it lurks underneath me like a shark
And it'll swallow me whole if I let it.

I'm 16 when I realize
That equality has yet to happen
That in some countries men oppress women
That in some places people are racist
That in some places people open fire
And kill
Their own kind

I'm 16 when I know
The crushing weight
Of failing
Without really failing
And the questioning
Of
What the point of
My existence was
And
The crushing weight
Of existing

So don't tell me
That I'm too young to be sad
And
Let me ask you
If not everyone wants to save the world
Is the world really worth saving?
We call ourselves human
And pride ourselves on our humanity
But when it comes down to it
We do many things
That is not human
Why
Do we open fire
And kill our own kind
Why
Do we treat others differently
Because
Of their skin tone?
And why
Do we not think
That basic rights
Should be given to all genders?

So if
Not everyone wants to
Save the world
Are you going to allow the world to die?
To rot from climate change
And the crap that happens inside it?

You see where I am coming from.

You see why I am sad?

Do not tell me
I am young
That I do not know better
Because
I know
That the media
Has shielded us
From many things
And I want to do something about it.

Yes
I am young
Yes
I am still inexperienced in the ways of the world
But
The world
Has already made my soul
Old.

[The world is a dark enough place already. Be kind to one another. And please, try your very best to be a shining light. I think it's what the world needs these days.]