Hate is a strong word, but I still hate you.

Chapter twenty-three, Miscarriage

*Rayne's POV*

   Days turned into weeks and a weeks turned into months, my stomach slowly growing.
   After one month it was time for Katy to go on tour and the social worker to come back. I'd completely forgotten about it and when I signed the letter to say I would stay Taylor decided to throw a party.
   It was cut short by my vomiting.
   Two months on from that I was beginning to show but Taylor was huge. She was eight months pregnant compared to my four.
   Taylor still didn't know. That was until today.

   I woke up and rubbed my sore stomach. I went downstairs and Taylor gave me a huge grin. She put a hand to my stomach.
   "I can't believe it. You're finally getting better." I knew she was referring to the fact that I'd starved myself when I first moved in and ever since I had been extremely underweight.
   I played along with Taylor's theory, after all, I had been eating a lot, in cravings.
   My stomach was still in a lot of pain, it had been for around two days. The toaster popped and the bread almost jumped out. Taylor grabbed it and buttered it then put it in front of me.
   "Thanks." I began to eat the toast but each bite made my stomach clench. I couldn't eat it. I pushed it away as Alison came down chatting to Wyatt.
   I didn't stay. I stood up and slowly went back to my room. Surprise surprise. After a few minutes Taylor came up and I had to choke back my tears.
   I didn't want Taylor to see me cry again.
   "Are you okay baby?" She asked.
   "I'm fine." I said. My stomach gave a sharp twinge then settled, it still hurt though.
   "Rayne. Are you sure?" I'm not sure why, I'm guessing hormones, but I became suddenly annoyed.
   "I'm fine." I sat up and slid off the bed. I pulled on my boots and walked down the stairs and out of the front door.

*Taylor's POV*

   I totally blew it. I know there's something wrong with Rayne, she's been acting strange for a couple of months now but she won't talk to me, no matter how hard I try.
   When she ran out of the door I hobbled down the stairs and out to the car. I saw Alison running after Rayne.
   "Ali!" I shouted. She stopped and turned to look at me.
   "I'll look around the local area! You look further away!" She yelled back.
   I nodded and got in the car. After struggling with my seatbelt I gunned the engine and stepped on the pedal.

   After two hours we still hadn't found Rayne.
   I turned another corner and saw Alison.
   "Ali!" I called. She came over. Her face was tear-stained and blotchy. "You haven't found her then?" She shook her head and brushed tears from her face. "Okay, go home. I'll keep looking." She nodded and I drove off.

   Another three hours later I saw the familiar waist length blonde hair. Rayne was curled in a ball, leaning against a wall. I cut the engine and ran over. 
   I put my hand to her shoulder and he looked up.
   "It just keeps coming out." She cried. Tears streamed from her eyes and she showed me her bloody hands.
   "Rayne, what did you do?" I asked. I was worried she had done something stupid or that she had cut herself again.
   "I don't know. It just keeps pouring out." Her hands were held in front of her face and she was looking at them in disbelief. Her whole body was shaking with fear.
   I called an ambulance and sat with Rayne as she screamed.
   I had no idea what was happening. When she screamed again she clutched her stomach. I held her close and she gripped at the back of my top and she screamed a third time.
   An ambulance arrived a few minutes later and they took her into it. I wasn't allowed so I followed in my car.

*Two hours later*

   The doctors had stopped the bleeding and she was still unconscious from the anaesthetic they had given her. They hadn't old me what had happened but I assumed it was her Leukaemia.
   "The anaesthetic should be wearing off now." A doctor told me before she left.
   I quickly glanced at Rayne before I ran out after the doctor. I caught up with her just down the corridor.
   "What was wrong with her?" I asked.
   "Didn't anybody tell you?" She asked.
   "No."
   "Miss Swift, your daughter had a miscarriage."
   "Thank you." I said before I turned and went back to Rayne. I sat down on one of the hard, blue, hospital chairs and waited for Rayne to wake up.
   If she was pregnant that would have explained her weird eating habits and her growing stomach. I can't believe I didn't notice, I just assumed she was getting better.
   When Rayne opened her eyes she sat up and pulled her knees to her chest.
   "What happened?" She asked. "Do they know what's wrong with me?"
   "You had a miscarriage." I said flatly, folding my arms.
   "Oh no." She whispered.
   "Too right, oh no." I said. She looked at me and a tear slipped out of her eye.
   "I'm sorry." She mumbled, looking away.
   "Oh, because that makes it all better. You're sorry." I wasn't even angry at Rayne, very disappointed and upset, yes, but not angry. Tears flowed freely from her eyes now.
   "It's not my fault." She said.
   "It's not your fault? How did it happen then? Do you think you can just turn on the waterworks and you'll get away with it? Not this time Rayne."
   "I ... I was ... I-"
   "Save it." I cut Rayne off and left to go sign her discharge papers.
   Once I had I went back I grabbed Rayne by the wrist and practically dragged her to the car. She got in and slammed the door.
   "What's your problem Rayne?" I yelled when I got in the car.
   "You wouldn't care. Why should I tell you when all you do is ruin my life?" She shouted back.
   "I ... I ... I-"
   "Save it Taylor!" Rayne snapped. I drove us home and Rayne jumped from the car. She made a point of slamming every door and stomping on every footstep on her way up to her room.
   "And don't come down until you think about what you've done!" I yelled to her. I sat in the front room and Wyatt came in, Alison tailing him.
   "Get out of my sight!" I spat at Alison. "I bet you knew the whole time. You're a disgrace. How can you call yourself her girlfriend?"
   "We're not officially dating." She said quietly. She turned and left, running up the stairs.
   "Babe?" Wyatt asked. He sat down next to me and held my hands. "What happened Taylor?"
   "She had a miscarriage!" I spat.
   "Oh no. Taylor, what did you do?"
   "What do you think? I yelled at her."
   "Taylor, Rayne was raped."
   "Oh crap!" I felt bad instantly.
   I hobbled up the stairs and opened Rayne's door.
   "Get out!" She spat.
   "I'm sorry. Wyatt just told me." I pulled her into my arms and I felt the anger leave Rayne.

   She cried for almost two hours before I built up the courage to apologise properly.
   "Rayne. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions like that. I'm really sorry, I am."
   "It's okay, I guess." Her tears slowed and finally stopped. When they did she pulled away and went to pull some clean clothes from her closet. She took them to the bathroom and I heard taps running.
   I went downstairs and cooked some food. When Rayne came down she was washed and changed. I set the food before her and she looked at it.
   "Rayne!" I said sternly. She picked up her fork and began to take tiny bites. I plated everyone else's meals up then went to fetch Wyatt and Alison. Alison went downstairs but Wyatt wouldn't look at me.
   "What's wrong?" I asked, putting my hand to his shoulder. He turned to face me.
   "I've been offered a job in New York, it's my dream job but ..." He said.
   "That's great news." I said, a little confused.
   "I know but I have to leave in two days and I won't be back for eleven months."
   "That's fine." I said, my voice catching.
   "I was a planning on asking you to marry me." He mumbled.
After a stunned silence I mumbled "Yes."
"Really?" He asked.
"Yes." I said again, more sure of myself. He pulled a box from his pocket and slid a little silver band on my finger.
He gave me a quick peck on the lips before beginning to pack his bags.

*Rayne's POV*

When Taylor and Wyatt finally came down the stairs they were hand-in-hand and Taylor was literally glowing.
"What happened to you two?" I asked, pushing peas around my plate.
"Nothing." Taylor said, holding out her left hand. On her fourth finger was a silver band.
"You're engaged! To my brother!" I yelled. Her face fell. "Well, I must admit, that is a little bit weird but congratulations." I said. Taylor's glow returned and she slid into a chair.
"Oh, Wyatt has to leave in a few days for a while." Taylor said. She looked at her plate and picked at her food.
"What's today's date?" I asked, just remembering something.
"June eighth, why?" Wyatt said.
"Katy has a mid tour break for two months on the tenth." I was suddenly too excited.
Taylor dropped her fork and put her hand to her stomach.
"Wyatt, you're not going to be here when she's born." She began to cry.
"I'm so sorry sweetheart." He held her hands and she stopped her tears.
"It's okay, I'm just being silly." She picked up her fork and carried on eating.
I picked up my plate and put it in the sink. I went to my room and grabbed my phone.
I had to call someone. When I found the number for Tiffany's I hit call.
"Hello, how can I help."
"I'd like a silver band wedding ring bracelet charm making please. The address is ..."

After a few hours I got a text message saying that the charm should arrive in three to five working days. I closed my eyes and sleep came.

   When I woke up it was the ninth. Katy is back tomorrow. I brushed my hair and change my clothes.
   After I had some breakfast I went to my room and grabbed the only book in the house I hadn't read.
   Two hours later I had finished it. I went and sat in the front room and flicked through three hundred-ish channels before Taylor grabbed the remote.
   "What's up with you?" She asked.
   "I've read all of my books."
   "You can borrow mine." She said.
   "I've read those too." I admitted.
   "Go buy some." Taylor gave me a handful of money. "It might keep you quiet for and hour or so.
   "I don't read that fast!" I said, pretending to be offended.

   After six hours and fourteen stores I managed to find a few books.
   I picked up a 'Chocolate Cream' from Starbucks and added a ton of cinnamon too.
   When I got home I was still sipping Starbucks and I was seven books poorer, well Taylor was anyway.
   I gave Taylor the change and began to devour one of my new books. After three hours I handed it to Taylor.
   "You should read that, it's amazing." She opened it and I got to work on its sequel.
   After a while my head began to hurt and my eyes began to drop. I folded the corner of the page and set the book down on the arm of the sofa.
   I put my head on Taylor's waist and began to fall asleep.
   At one point I'm sure I woke up and saw Wyatt carrying me up to bed. I don't really remember, I did sleep very well after that though.