Shattered Appearances ✓

f o u r t e e n: You Can Sleep When You're Dead

Stage two was anger.

It's been two months since Stephanie's pregnancy scare and everything returned to the way it was. It seemed like our previous bonding experience was forgotten by her because soon enough, she went back to ignoring me. It was fine though; I was used to it.

With December came naked trees and crispy cool air. My lungs burned as I opened the door to the house and stepped inside. Winter was my least favorite holiday. The shorter days and lack of vacation put me in a depressing mood.

As I put my jacket on the coat racket, I saw Stephanie laying on the couch. She had a heating pack on her abdomen and a blanket covering the rest of her body. Stephanie was obviously trying to fall asleep, but by the way she was fidgeting, it was clear that she didn't achieve that goal yet.

I so desperately wanted to go to my room, climb up to my bed and fall asleep. I felt like a mindless zombie right now. But as much as I tried, I couldn't ascend the carpeted wooden steps. It was my fatal flaw; I always put others before me. Always.

With a tired sigh, I went into the kitchen and started boiling water for some green tea. Whenever I had a stomach pains, my mother would always mix honey and ginger with the green tea. It worked most of the time. When I finished, I went into the living room and handed Stephanie the glass.

"You look fucking terrible."

She scowled but took the glass anyway. Muttering a thanks, she sat up and took a sip. I sat down besides her and closed my eyes. "What's wrong with you? It looks like you're going to die on me any second now."

I frowned at how over dramatic Stephanie was being but I made no attempt to open my eyes. "I haven't slept for a day and a half. Midterms are coming up and if I don't pass Calculus then I'll fail the semester and may have to repeat the year. Thomas offered to tutor me but I didn't know how rigorous he would be. We have another study session in an hour."

I heard Stephanie make a sound of acknowledgement and she continued sipping her tea. I knew that there was no use going up to my room if I would have to be up in forty minutes to go to the park. Although I couldn't possibly fathom why Thomas would want to study in the chilly air, he thought that it would be a nice contrast to the dimly lit library.

"I think you should go to a doctor. You've had this fever for a week. It should be gone by now."

I half expected her to reject the idea but for once she agreed. When she said she already did, I opened my eyes in surprise and looked at her, "Mom already made an appointed when my OB-GYN."

"Good to know that you took someone's advice for once." I bitterly mumbled. Although I didn't want it to bother me, it ticked me off how Stephanie listed to Monica's advice when I've been preaching the same thing for the better half of a week.

She noticed my tone of voice and her mood evaporated instantly, "Whatever. I'm going to bed. Have fun studying and hope you don't miss sleep too much. With your grades, you probably won't be sleeping for a while." Stephanie took her blanket and stalked up the stairs to her room.

What a bitch.

Groaning, I rubbed my eyes and grabbed my jacket. I was hoping to maybe take a nap but my kindness ended up destroying me. Bracing myself for the winter cold, I opened the door and headed outside. I arrived at our spot a couple of minutes later and Thomas was already there with textbooks and notebooks in his hand. Besides him on the frozen grass was a basket.

"I hope you're not planning on having a picnic here."

He looked up at me and smiled while motioning for me to sit down. He handed me a thermo with hot chocolate.

"Why are you so happy. It's disturbing. Come on, frown." I tried to turn his smile upside down with my fingers until he grabbed my hand and set it down. Rolling his eyes, he handed me a textbook and I turned to the page where we left off.

I took a sip of the hot chocolate and tried not to moan in happiness. This was probably the only good thing about winter: hot drinks.

"My mom made too much for breakfast so she wanted me to give some to you. She also wanted me to thank you for getting me out of the house but I'm not doing that."

"You just did." I commented.

He ignored me and went on with the lesson. The hot chocolate gave me a little bit of energy but after an hour I started dozing off.

"I'm sorry, am I boring you?" The annoyance in his eyes radiated from his glasses and I couldn't help but yawn in response.

"No. Well, maybe a bit. I'm just tired. It took me all night to do my homework and finish those extra math problems you sent me."

"You actually did those?" Thomas asked in astonishment. "I half expected you not to do them. That's why I gave you three pages. I wanted to do some of them now."

I mentally facepalmed and wanted to cry. I wasted sleep for nothing. Pushing Thomas, he lost his balance and fell into the grass. It didn't hurt since he was already sitting down but at least it made me feel better.

"I hate you." I said simply as I put my notebook on the floor.

"No you don't. If you really did, then you would've asked Lucy to tutor you instead of me. As I recall, she actually has a higher grade in calculus than I do." He snickered when he saw my face.

"I asked her. She already had too many students. You're my second choice actually." I let out a small chuckled when he grumbled and we focused on the course work again. The truth was, if I really wanted too, I could have asked her and she would've said yes. Although I know Lucy's apology was sincere, it was hard to pick up a friendship after two years of not talking. What she did really hurt but I couldn't blame her. If she was accused of what I was accused of, I probably wouldn't want to talk to her either.

After I almost fell asleep again Thomas said, "Alright, let's take you home. I have shit to do anyway."

I didn't hesitate to grab my things and stand up. My hands were so cold now that I was afraid that I would get frostbite.

"Wow, I didn't know you were so excited to leave my presence." He deadpanned.

"I'm tired. Enough said." Since I walked home and he had a car, Thomas offered to drive me home. The ride was silent and comfortable, and soon enough I was in front of my house.

As I was about to open the car door Thomas said, "You know, I actually think you won't completely fail this exam. You might pass with a 66%"

"I hate you." I replied once again although I didn't mean it. He winked before driving off.\

I dropped my supplies on the table before going to my room. Jumping on the bed, I hugged my pillow and closed my eyes tightly. I never felt so happy to be in my bed.

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A/N- Yes, I know. Not the most interesting chapter and it was pretty much a filler. But I do think that this added to the friendship between Thomas and Zoey so this chapter wasn't a complete fail.  Things will heat up soon so don't worry. I'm not planning to be stuck here forever. Please vote and comment if you liked the chapter.

See you next chapter. Love you all.