Broken trust

CHAPTER SEVEN

Assalam Alaikum,

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CHANGE, they say change is inevitable. It does what it's called 'change'. We get used to our life the way it is that we fear change regardless. We wouldn't want to start afresh. But sometimes, change is good; change can turn out to be for the best. We get a chance to face life with another perspective.

Amal woke up with a start and felt sick, She ran to the toilet to throw up when Hameed woke up. He ran to the toilet to help her. They came out together. Amal was in his arms as he sat her down on the bed. 'baby this is the second time you are throwing up this morning, we need to see a doctor.' Hameed said. 'No, I think it's just a minor stomach upset. I'll be fine.' Amal responded with a smile. He laid her down and covered her with the blanket. 'I'll make breakfast' he offered and left for the kitchen. Amal watched as he left the room.

Hameed came in 30 minutes later with the food but found her sleeping. He carefully set the food on the table and sat close to her. She was so innocent and beautiful, he hate to hurt her. And for the first time he felt something in his heart. He felt the desire to save her, to protect her, he wanted to love her, and he wanted to walk away from this entire crusade. He needed her. But hameed knew it was impossible, he knew he can't feel that way. He knew he will have to hurt her. He knew he has to leave her someday. The day, he himself will take her father's life. He knew he will hurt her like nobody will, He knew he will break her, And he hated himself for that inevitable fate.

Just then, Amal opened her big round eyes and set them right on his face. He smiled at her and she reciprocated. 'How long have you been sitting here?' she asked as she made the effort to sit. Hameed helped her and kept staring at her face without saying a word. 'hameed' she called again as she touched his leg that was close to hers. 'What are you thinking about?'. 'Nothing, just appreciating Allah's work, subhanallah! You are beautiful'. He said with a smile. Amal did not utter a word, she just kept staring at him and every single nerve in her body kept telling her to crush him. She just watched as he served her breakfast and she kept asking herself how he does it. How he kept lying and pretending. She believed him all those years but now, she is not buying any of it. She want to open up, to tell him she knew so she could not tolerate all of his lies, so she can be free of him. But alas!! She can't do that because Najeeb told her to play along. Hameed is too dangerous. 'Hey princess, what are you thinking about?'. His voice brought her back from her thoughts. 'Nothing'. She answered shortly and smiled. Hameed fed her and she felt miserable as she played along.

Slow and steady, with so much care Hameed finished feeding her and cleared the room. She went into the bathroom and bathes herself. She was dressing up when he came in again. He was all dressed up; he looked more handsome than ever. When Amal looked at him she felt pure hatred for him but she was more disappointed in herself for being so ignorant. He offered to apply the body lotion for her. As Hameed was applying the lotion gently and kissing her tenderly, Amal hated it, she wanted to stop him, she hates it, to her it was like she was with a total stranger. They made love and Amal felt so miserable, to her it was disgusting. She went to perform the ritual bath and she cried hard in the shower. For the first time she wanted to kill Hameed for playing with her life and turning her life to be one of his plans in killing her father. 'Darn you Hameed'. She said as she kept crying.

He told her had an appointment that he had to leave as soon as possible. She knew that was also another lie because she has all his schedules. She nodded as he kissed her goodbye. Amal dressed up and headed out also to meet Najeeb. She drove fast and cried her eyes out.

At the Najeeb's recident, she met five gentlemen including Najeeb. 'Assalam Alaikum'. The Muslim greeting meaning, peace be upon you. They all looked up surprised; they weren't expecting her that day because Najeeb said he would call her if he needed her. But Amal couldn't wait, she had to see him. 'Wa'alaikum Salam'. They all answered in unison. 'Come on in'. Najeeb invited. Amal entered fully into the sitting room and stood by the door. She was uncomfortable, they were all staring at her and she felt like an outcast amongst them. 'I need the room'. Najeeb said and all the rest stood up and left. She was relieved a little. 'Why are you here?, I told you to stay still, you are not supposed to come here. What if you were followed?'. Najeeb said out of anger. 'I wasn't followed'. Came her reply rather harshly than she expected. 'How can you possibly know? You were just supposed to follow a simple instruction. Why can't you just stay still and let us handle this'. He was yelling. 'Enough, you think it's easy to stay under the same roof with a killer, not just any killer but who wants to kill your father!! You think it's easy to fake that smile and pretend everything is fine when it's not. You think it's easy to have to wake up to his face every single morning? To have watch him touch me? We made love today!!! Do you know how it felt? I hated myself for it every vein in my body wanted me to say something, everything. I wanted to end it all but I played along like you said. So forgive me if I needed some fresh air. I think I can have that at least'. She cried hard as she struggled for breath.

Najeeb was speechless. She is right; everything is just too much for her to handle right now. She needs a break. But showing up at his house will jeopardise everything. 'I understand how you feel, but Amal you need to endure all this, if you really want to win. I have been on this mission for some time now and I know how it feels to wait. But that is the only option we have left. It will only get worse; whatever you are feeling right now is just a warm up. You need to be strong and be able to endure the pretence. It will be better but only if we stick to plan. You will be free of him I promise you and your father will be saved. But for now, I want you to go back home and play along; we must not risk him finding out that you know his secret because if he does, you yourself will be in danger. I cannot protect your father when I'm busy saving you, okay?' he reasoned. 'fine, but you need to tell me something because I'm literally losing my mind in there.' She stared at him with raw emotions and even though Najeeb doesn't admit it, he, himself was tired of looking int her hopeful eyes as he crush the little hope she has left. He was lost; putting her in danger eats him up every second. Staying with Hameed is very dangerous for her, now that she knows the truth, he is not ready to let someone else die for his mistake. Not again. Her screams he kept on hearing, her pain, her cries, her voice and lastly his name she called. He couldn't save his SULTANA, but now, he will not lose this girl. He wasn't going to lose Amal.