Penance of Honor | BOOK 2 ✔️

Chapter: Twenty-Eight

Isaac's P.O.V

I press my lips onto his cheek and then his forehead. His fever had broken, but he still has yet to open his eyes. It only makes me grow more worried.

My eyes look to the water and food some of my packmates placed there for me, but I have no desire to eat. Not even the smallest. My heart is hurting too much to want for much more than my mate's eyes to open.

In my heart of hearts, I know he had done what he did out of the love he has for me. However, I can only think of it as something selfish now that I see him laying down like this. How could he be so narrow-minded and do this to me, knowing I would not be able to bear this burden?

I cannot live with myself if I am the death of him. Tears begin to swell in my eyes causing my throat to tighten. He knew this so...why...?

Soon, my hand begins to reach for his wanting to feel his warmth against my skin. The sparks are still there causing me to press his hand close to my cheek.

"Stevens...you are all I will ever love...and if you die... I swear half of me will die with you. I had given you my heart and my love...and it's not meant to be given to anyone else but you..."

I look at his unchanging face and muscle down a sob.

"I only agreed to become Ronan's caretaker because of you, because it was something that you wanted. And I only wanted to give you whatever you desired...if it made you happy."

My voice breaks as tears come falling down my cheeks.

"I can't do this by myself...I am not fit to be a child's role model...I've done too much terrible things...Stevens."

"Even saying your name hurts..." I press my hand to my chest. "I feel like I am already dying."

One of my packmates comes to the entrance of the room reluctant to make eye contact with me.

"Alpha..."

"What is it?"

"Pierce, Aaron, Sanuel, and the Northern Alpha, are all together in a room trying to dissolve some differences."

"And what does that have to do with me?" I growl.

"I... thought you might have wanted to voice your opinion on things...Alpha."

I look into his eyes before cutting them away.

"Leave me. Just... do not come and bother me with pack ties and relations any longer."

"Alpha-"

"Let me share what little moments I may have left with him in peace. Please."

He nods his head before closing the door making me feel even worse than I have already been feeling. I need him close to me. I need his arms to wrap around me and hear his voice telling me that it's ok. I need that so badly.

I get up from my seat near his bedside and loom over him until I decide to climb over the railings. Soon, I have myself pressed against him. I can feel the thump of his heart beating against mine, comforting me beyond belief.

My face tucks into the nape of his neck smelling that strange scent of citrus. Still, I wrap my hands around his back and let out a shaky sigh. It is a comforting smell, simply because that scent does not go away no matter how many times I see him. He has always smells like this.

I nuzzle my face into his neck more trying to stop myself from crying. A headache is beginning to develop from it and everything is beginning to become hazy.

"Stevens...come back to me," I murmur into his skin.

Anyone seeing me like this must think I am a wounded beast trying to defend its lair. They know I am incapable of much...but it matters so little to me. I am wounded and I am stricken with an unbearable amount of pain. I am supposed to always be strong, and seem strong even when I am not. But I can no longer uphold that facade anymore.