Killing Me Slowly (Third Book to the Secrets Will Kill You Series)

Something Is More Than Just Wrong

I didn't move...I didn't talk...I don't even think I was breathing. I just kept staring at the phone in his hand that he didn't shut. He didn't move either, he just kept staring down at the phone as well. I finally lifted my head and that alone took all my might. I stared into Dean's eyes as he stared into mine and honestly, he looked like he was ready to cry...and I couldn't hold the truth in anymore.

"I agree with Abbey. I never talked about it before but I have thought about how I'm in this mess because of you. But, then I think hey, I'm a Stern, I must be cursed because of my family tree being filled with the best hunters of all time and I try not to think that it's your fault...but I do. And I've thought about leaving with Brittney and being on our own again, I've thought about it way before the apocalypse even started. I've even thought about taking Jesse and leaving while you were in your state of depression and you were drinking every night while at Abbey and Chris'...but I cant leave and ya know why?"

I twisted my whole body so I was on my knees, facing him. "Because I love you. I love you so much that it hurts sometimes and I hate you for making me love you so much. Six years ago, I would have never even thought about love or being in a serious relationship with somebody but then you just waltz in, I find out we already have history, we couldn't even remember it and then we act like we can just pick up where we left off...it doesn't work like that, Dean. It's not supposed to"

"But, Melissa...that just shows how Abbey's wrong and we are meant to be together if we can just pick up where we left off even if we cant remember how we left off" he babbled slightly.

I saw more tears build in his eyes as his face was pained. It broke my heart seeing him like that but I couldn't stop. "I don't know, Dean...and now Abbey's filling out papers to get full custody of Jesse that we already signed because we didn't know all of this was going to happen...we didn't know about how Sam and Brittney were just going to throw themselves to Lucifer and we didn't know we would end up going to live with my step sister, her husband and our son for a year just to have our brother and sister come back from Hell with no explanation..."

"So since we were so ignorant, we just gave up our son, just like that...and I cant help but wonder if it's because you influenced me somehow to do that or just because I've been going even crazier ever since we met...but you do influence my decisions... a lot...and you and Sam have changed me...and before six years ago, I would've smacked myself for this..."

Then, I just clenched my teeth together and squeezed my lips together so I would stop. He continued to just stare into my eyes as a tear slipped down his cheek and pain was written all over his face.

The only thing I could think to do, without spilling anything else, was just get out of the car and walk toward the house and walked inside. I wrapped my arms around my stomach as I went looking for Sam and Brittney. Dean found us minutes later and I could tell he wasn't up to even be around me right now but he tried to push away the feeling as he told Brittney and Sam that we had to talk. I kept quiet and held back a bit, afraid I would just blurt out anything at any second. He asked them why they just stood there while the vamp attacked him. They said that they froze. Which didn't make sense at all because they've both been Terminator since they got back...but they stuck with that story and explained how they feel terrible and how they didn't understand how Dean could even think they meant for it to happen. But, I didn't believe them...and it got me on edge since they would have to be forced to tell the truth...but what they said...just wasn't the truth. I couldn't just call them out on it though, what proof did I have?

So, we got back to the motel to do some more research. Sam and Brittney had found a small box under the girl's bed and pulled out a cat's skull, grains of paradise seed and a double shoe string. Mix those things together and you got yourself a summoning spell for the goddess, Veritas and anyone who asks aloud for the truth, they invoke her. She just doesn't give the truth though, she slams you with it...Dean and I found that part out the hard way...and she continues to slam you with the truth until you kill yourself and gets her tribute so if we didn't stop this chick, Dean was going to be next on the menu. Dogs were this bitch's Akeley's heel and she was an attention whore, she wanted nothing more than to be worshiped. What's the 21st century version of speaking truth to the masses, you might ask: well it's the news of course.