Killing Me Slowly (Third Book to the Secrets Will Kill You Series)

Back And Ready To Go

It's been a few days since Death put Brit and Sam’s souls back in them and they were still unconscious. I was pacing so much I felt like I thought the ground was disappearing from beneath me. I could barely sleep because I was so worried about Brit and Sam so I basically looked like crap and I was cranky...not a good combo. We called Cas so he could just make sure Brit and Sam’s were put back into place…and they were but we didn’t know what else to do.

“Are they ever gonna wake up?” Dean asked.

“I'm not a human doctor, Dean”

“Could you take a guess?”

“Okay. Probably not”

“Oh, well, don't sugarcoat it”

“I'm sorry, Dean, but I warned you not to put that thing back inside them”

“What were we supposed to do?!” I snapped at him.

“Let T-1000 and the Terminator walk around and hope they don’t open fire?”

“Let me tell you what their souls felt like when I touched them. Like they have been skinned alive, Melissa. If you wanted to kill your brother and sister, you should have done it outright”

But, I didn’t want to hear anymore. I just walked away and headed upstairs to Bobby in the living room while he was behind the desk and I just continued to pace around as Dean came up as well and sat down in a chair.

"Girl, you’re going to pace a hole into my floor" Bobby commented.

I ignored him as I just kept my head down and kept moving my legs. "Babe, you’re exhausted, why don't you..." Dean started but when I snapped my head up at him, he shut up and he backed off.

I sighed. "I’m sorry, I'm sorry..." I muttered and sat on the couch.

But I just put my head in my hands and started shaking my leg, making some floorboards creak. "Okay, okay, go back to pacing" He jerked his thumb so I stood back up and continued pacing. Bobby poured three glasses of scotch.

“Like my daddy always said, ‘just 'cause it kills your liver don't mean it ain't medicine’” he said and I downed mine. I ignored their stares as I continued to pace. “Sam and Brit still asleep?”

“Yeah” we both replied, monotonously.

“They’ll wake up”

“Yeah"

“Dean, Mel, they’ve been through how much? Somehow, they always bounce back”

“They’ve never been through this” I muttered.

Then, there was silence. “Job?” Dean questioned and I saw him pick up a newspaper.

“Might be”

“Can we help? Send us to the library? Anything?”

“Couple goes up in a light plane. Wreckage was just found in the woods”

“Couple of Buddy Hollys? Doesn't really seem like ‘news of the weird’” I said before Dean could.

He looked up at me as I walked over to them. I needed to wrap my head around something else for the moment…we both had to. “Pilot was found 17 miles away, flambéed. Girl's just gone. No body, no nothing”

“Okay, I'm not changing the channel” Dean said and I turned to pace some more but I felt my breath hitch up into my throat and I moved to the side absentmindedly and then froze.

"Dean..." Sam whispered. Dean spun around and got to his feet as well. "Sammy" Dean breathed out.

Then...I really saw it. I saw the sweet, puppy dog, do-eyed look...it was Sam. He rushed to Dean and hugged him tight. Dean was hesitant but returned the hug...then they let go and he hugged Bobby...then he looked at me and rushed to me and lifted me off the ground a little as he hugged me so tight that I almost couldn't breath. I had that feeling of being safe and secure…the feeling a big brother would give off…I almost forgot what it was like. Then, he let go and my eyes widened as I raced off, around the corner and skipping some steps as I ran down to the basement and I saw Brit come walking out of the panic room.

"Oh my god..." I gasped.

"Mel" she replied and I saw it in her too...the innocent, sweet girl, do-eyed look...it was in her eyes.

She raced to me as I met her half way and we hugged each other so tight...I felt my insides ache a little as they were being put back into place and I was being put back together.

“It’s so good to see you” she whispered.

“You too, Brit…”

But, then, I heard footsteps and I spun to see it was Dean racing down the stairs. “Dean!” she cheered and raced to him. She hugged him tight as he lifted her up a little and hugged her back.

Then, we all went upstairs and Brit hugged Bobby right away…and then her and Sam shared a look…and I really did wish I could know what they were both thinking.

“Wait. But, I…I could’ve sworn that Lucifer made me snap your neck…” she started with a sad tone as she looked at Bobby.

“Well, Cas kind of…”

“Cas is alive?” Sam and Brit, both asked.

“Yea…Cas is fine” I nodded and smiled at them. “Sam, Brit…are you guys okay?” Dean asked.

Actually…” Brit started. “We’re starving” Sam answered. There it was…they were finishing each other’s sentences already. I couldn’t help but smile at that.

We got them both sandwiches and gathered in the kitchen. We all watched them carefully as they pretty much just shoveled the food into their mouths. “Guys…what’s the last thing you both remember?” I asked.

“The field…” Brit shrugged. “Then we fell” Sam said.

“And then?” Dean asked.

“Woke up in the panic room”

“That's it? You really don't remember…” Bobby started.

“Lets be glad” Dean said, quickly, interrupting Bobby.

“Yea, who wants to remember all that Hell?” I asked, rhetorically.

“How long were we gone?” Brit asked.

“About a year and a half” Dean answered.

“What?” Brit said, shocked. They exchanged a look. “We don’t remember a thing” Sam said and Brit shook her head. “How did we get back? Cas?” Brit asked.

“Not exactly” Dean said and I hung my head slightly and played with my fingers. “Dean, what did you do?” Sam demanded.

“Me and Death…”

“Death?! The horseman?”

“He had leverage…” I said quickly to get a word in and help Dean out. “It’s done”

“Are you sure?” Brit asked.

“Yea…it’s done. Slate’s wiped” he said.

“Well, isn't this just neat and clean” Bobby commented.

“Yes, it is…for once” Dean replied, a bit harsh.

“Is there anything else we should know?” Sam asked.

“Nope…more beer?” I smiled lightly. “Uhh yea” they both replied.

So, I stood up and got them more beer…I tried to keep up a smile and just be thankful that they were really back…but I couldn’t help but worry a little.

After a while, Dean and I headed out to Bobby who was fixing up a truck. “Hey” we both voiced so he would look over at us. “How are they?” he asked. “Good…really good, actually” I answered.

“Better than I could have hoped” Dean added. “Uh-huh” Bobby said but there was something really off about him.

“What? Why the poopface?”

“I'm glad they’re better. I really am”

“But…”

“Those kids went straight-up Menendez on me not 10 days ago…you know, Mel, you were there…you saw what they tried doing…and now it's all just... erased? Sorry. I'm having a bit of a hard time even looking at them”

“But that wasn’t Sam and Brittney” I said.

“Well, maybe it wasn't all Sam and Brittney…but it was them, Melissa” he said as he started to head over to us. “Well, what do you want to do, Bobby? We tell them everything?” Dean questioned.

“No. Just wish I could, that's all.

“Yeah, but if we start throwing that crap at them, we don't know what's gonna happen”

“It could crack the wall. I know. I know”

“So as far as I’m concerned, it’s a gift horse and I’m not looking for teeth. Hell, I’m sending Death a friggin fruit basket” I said.

“They’re gonna find out, you know. One way or another, someone will tell them, or they'll figure it out on their own. They’re not dumb. They should it hear it from us”

“Can we just leave it alone for the moment, please?” Dean asked.

“Okay. But you better prep for the "B" side, 'cause when Sam and Brittney realize we're shining him…it ain't gonna be cute” I knew that already…and that’s something that really worried me.

~~~~

Dean and I were getting ready to head out with Bobby to try and solve this case that he found and Brit and Sam had fallen asleep with each other a while ago. The sight made us both smile…knowing they couldn’t remember the way they treated each other these past couple months. We left them alone and walked outside and started to head over to Bobby but I grabbed his hand to stop him and face me.

“Since they don’t know anything at all…it means they don’t know about the miscarriage either…and I don’t want them to, especially Brit…” I averted my eyes.

He grabbed my chin to lift my head and look at him and gave me a gentle look. “Okay…no one else has to know…”

“No one else has to know what?” Bobby asked us. “Nothing” Dean answered and grabbed my hand to lead me to the Impala and Bobby followed as I felt his eyes on us.

“Sam and Brit still asleep?” he asked.

“Yeah, let them rest. We'll call them later”

“Call us from where?” Sam asked and him and Brit were standing behind us.

I’m so distracted right now, I couldn’t even hear them coming. “Uh, there's this thing in Oregon” I told them. “Great. We’re in” Sam said.

“Whoa, whoa. You both just got vertical” Dean tried.

“Exactly. We’re up. We’re good” Brit said.

“Well, a few more days of crap cable couldn't hurt”

“Right. Because that's what you did when you got back from Hell” Dean contemplated as I stared up him, anticipating his answer.

“Alright. Us four and Bobby”

“Oh, you kids go on ahead. You got this covered. I uhh forgot I promised that idjit Rufus I'd work the phones for him, so…” he lied.

“You sure?” I asked, stiffly.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. You four enjoy catching up, okay?” he said and then walked away.

“What was that?” Sam asked.

“One part age, three parts liquor” Dean answered. “Come on” I smiled, hooking an arm around hers and we walked over to my truck.

Honestly, I didn’t even want to be driving this damn truck right now…which used to not be like me at all…but now…I don’t know. It kind of hurts to just sit in my seat and start the thing up.

Night fell when we got to Oregon and Sam called the police station and then texted us the information. Besides the plane crash, there were two other disappearances in town this week. One college girl from her apartment building from the [i]seventh[/i] floor and another girl never made it home from school. There were no connections though, between any of them. They were just young females…what could take a girl from the sky anyway…?

“So you never even tried? Never gave it a chance?” Brit’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “Give what a chance?” I asked.

“A real life…you do remember your promise, right?”

“Yea…I remember…”

“So, why didn't you try?”

“Who said I didn’t?”

“Have you seen yourself? And this? You’re exactly the same…maybe a little happier which is kind of creepy but I just assumed it was because of you and Dean…I can get used to your happy side though”

“Well, don’t” I chuckled. Then, it was silent. “I did give it a chance…I was with them for a year…Dean and I…we were living with Abbey, Chris and Jesse for a year”

“So, then, what happened?” I just shrugged.

“Didn’t work out”

“You and Dean are still together, though, right?”

I smiled at her, then back at the road. “Yea, we are…” I was afraid I was going to start babbling and tell her something that she shouldn’t really know at the risk of the wall breaking…and I wished Dean was at my side to keep my mouth shut…so I just pierced my lips shut and put on the radio.

~~~~

We all went to go see the plane crash victim’s sister and she just explained to us that Penny (the victim) was a shy, non adventurous kind of person. But, she did it for this Stan guy. Apparently they were getting serious and she just didn’t want to seem uninterested. Poor girl went up in a plane to impress a guy…ladies, never try to impress men, it’ll end badly. What I couldn’t help but notice though was how Sam and Brit were showing compassion for Penny’s sister…they weren’t stoned face or cold or harsh…they had emotion in their eyes and their faces. So, now, we were all at a motel, researching and whatnot. I smiled at Brit and Sam researching close to each other and I just couldn’t help but be happy that we actually had them back. Dean walked in with food and I flipped over onto my stomach as I was laying on the bed and he tossed me a burger and Brit a salad.

"What do you got?" he asked. "Well, looks like those other two missing girls both baked cookies for the lord" Sam said.

"What is that? Code?"

"No. Church choir, bake sales, promise-ring clubs. The works" Brit explained. "They were good girls" I added.

"But Penny wasn't even a Christian, so...I have another theory" he said and pulled out a pink book. "Penny's diary"

"Did you steal that from her room?" I asked, incredulous. "I love that you’d even ask me that. It's like you don't even know me at all" he sighed, pretending to be hurt and I just rolled my eyes at him.

"I had a diary...then it burned" I sighed but it wasn't even a sad sigh. Thinking about my family didn't make me upset anymore...just frustrated or angry...not even.

"I bet yours was filled of dirty, dirty things" he smirked, flipping through the diary.

"I am not that much of a dirty girl…anymore" I made a face at him. "I have memories of you on New Years that say otherwise" he chuckled. I glared as my jaw dropped a little.

"Okay guys. Dirty stories, later. Penny’s diary, now" Sam brought us back.

"Right. What if it's about purity?"

"You think they're all..." Brit started.

"Virgins, Brit. Virgins" Dean said, blatenly.

"Penny was 22" Sam pointed out.

"Yea and her room was pink..."

"With stuffed Teddy bears" I added.

"Fine. But you really think..." Sam started.

"'I've decided I'm going to give Stan my most precious gift'" Dean read a page from the diary.

"Okay...never say that again" I said. "Yea, that sounded really creepy coming out of your mouth" Sam said.

"I think I delivered it"

"Ya know...you could’ve led with 'the diary says...'..." Brit said. "Yea, or, 'She wrote...'" Sam added.

"Okay, whatever. Say Deans actually right, believe it or not...who would want virgins?" I question. Sam and Brit shrugged. "Got me. I prefer ladies with experience" Dean said and smirked at me. I just shook my head and threw a pillow at him.

"Wow a year later and you guys are still disgustingly dirty" Brit commented.

Dean and I just chuckled and I saw how Sam and Brit had amused smiles on their faces but their smiles were also genuine...like they were happy...happy to be alive and with us again...and they were smiles that I haven’t seen in a long time. When they smiled before...without their souls...they were just amused smiles or just from laughing...but their laughs weren't genuine...we seriously had Brit and Sam back.

We heard about another girl getting attacked but she didn't disappear. She was just badly injured at the hospital and when I saw her, I could tell she was also a little traumatized and still shaky. Her name was Melissa…was a little confusing but whatever…she explained that the thing that went at her looked like a giant bat and she noticed us shift in our spots but she swore it was huge and then she showed us three long scratches on her back that went from the top of her shoulder blade, down to her lower back.

“Melissa, is there anything else you can tell us? Even if it doesn’t seem important” Brit said.

“Well, my gold ring got lost. Or else that thing stole it, if that makes any sense”

“A…promise ring?” I questioned.

“Uhh yea, how’d you know?”

“Good guess”

“So…a purity ring?” Dean wanted to confirm.

“Yea…why?”

“I got to ask”

“Melissa, no one is judging anyone here…” Sam started.

“But should you really be wearing that ring?” I asked her.

I watched as something flashed in her eyes as she just stared at us. “Well, I-I mean…I-I am…Matt Barne didn’t count!” she snapped. We all just exchanged a look and finished up there.

We all headed outside. “So, what, you think Batman tried to rape her?” Dean quipped. “Well, he does carry a lot of rage” Sam said.

“But he rejected her because she was already dehymenated, huh?"

“You think?“

“I think it just goes to show that being easy's pretty much all upside…right girls?”

Brit and I both scoffed and she smacked him upside the head as I punched him in the face…but it wasn’t one of my [i]hard[/i] punches. He chuckled, grabbing onto his chin and moving it around.

“Sam and Brit bring out your dickhead side, keep it up and you’ll end up with a whole bunch more cuts and bruises, Winchester”

He grinned. For a moment, it felt like…what it used to feel like…six years ago when Dean and I first met and just started to get along and joke around and not be so…grown up all the time. I noticed he was staring at me…and I wanted to know what he was thinking…maybe he was thinking the same stuff that I was…maybe he was just analyzing me, like he always does….

“So, what kind of thing likes virgins and gold?” Sam questioned. “P. Diddy?” Dean replied.

“You know, it's comforting”

“What's that?”

“We died for a year, came back, and you're still not funny”

I laughed. “Shut up. I'm hilarious”

“Yea, you keep tellin yourself that, babe” I said and Brit laughed as Dean glared at me and Brit and I walked over to the truck.